Slipped back into balck hole-missed AB, stressed and sicklish

[Beetle]

HI All

I am pretty stressed out at the moment. New job, health concerns and worry and had just a quite intense medical procedure done. I am on AB's every morning and yesterday I forgot to take my AB, I didn't realize I forgot until I looked at the packet at night. I felt pretty down and 'isolated' . isolated in terms off having this tunnel vision & feeling disconnected from everyone around me. I could physically feel the darkness sucking me back into it. At work I could not engage with people and felt like I wasn't really there and caught myself thinking suicidal thoughts.

Somehow I made it through the shift, floating around forcing myself to 'engage'. Somehow it worked, I finoished my duties, I made it home.

I felt awful this morning, forced breaky into me, took my pill and could feel that it started working after an hour.

This whole experience was pretty scary and I wonder if one missed pill can have such an effect? I take a Serotonin and noradrenaline reuptake inhibitor for severe depression and anxiety.

Has anyone experienced such a thing were one missed pill threw u back? Or is it in my head? Am I paranoid to slip back into my suicidal world were I have been for so long?

thanks to all those wonderful people on this forum.

Love Beetle.

[Neil_1]

Hi Beetle,  

Your feelings that you experienced were real.   I take 3 meds;   but just one to start my day;   just after breakfast each morning.  It’s however a large dose (3 tablets) and it’s only been very very few and far between times when something has occurred at home where I completely forgot.  By late morning I usually begin to feel kind of spacey or light-headed and these feelings continue as the time goes by.  I haven’t ever made it through the whole day without taking them … because once I realise that I’ve forgotten, I hi-tail it to home and take them.  Hi-tailing VERY carefully I might add, as my judgement isn’t the best and I feel wonky – the feeling aren’t good at all.  

I don’t necessarily have bad thoughts, it’s just that I find it hard to manage to do anything because of the previously mentioned feelings I get.  

But then, everyone is different and likewise, the meds that you are on, are no doubt different to mine.   However if for some reason I wasn’t able to get home till later … I would still take them once I got home.  

 I can also understand why you forgot on this occasion, cause when you’re highly stressed and things are travelling through your mind, you aren’t thinking straight anyway and to accidentally forget can happen.   I do hope though that having had this little episode, it’ll give you a strong prompt or reminder at least for the foreseeable future to make sure it’s taken.  

May I ask what are AB’s ?   The only thing I can think of is anti-depressants, but that would be AD’s, wouldn’t it?  

Neil  

 Ps:  I hope that you are settling ok into your new job and that you are liking it?  

Pss:  likewise with the medical procedure, I hope that it went well and that all signs are positive with your recovery.

[Beetle]

Dear  Neil

Oh thanks so much for your long and helpful post Neil I really appreciate it 🙂 🙂

 Your kinds words really really reassured me that my feelings were not in my head and that the missed pill may have been the reason for my dark mood. You are right I was under a lot of stress, and all the dieting and fasting and the aneasthetic for the procedure  threw me completely out of balance. I could not think straight. That day of the procedure I also could not take my pill( wasn't allowed to) so I had one day with a late pill and the other day a missed one-no wonder my poor brain went into the dark zone....

Oh im on AD's -silly typos!! Haha. Yeah its a quite new serotonin noradrenaline reuptake inhibitor also used for fibromyalgia and stuff. Would love to tell u the name but I think the moderators will censor that....i take it for MDD and GAD.

Yesterdays work was a bit better, still a bit 'unengaged and touchy' but better. Also went for long walks today end yesterday to get the neurotransmitters flowing...

I decided to always put my pill next to my plate and only take it out of the blister pack when im ready to take tit. Also numbered them now so that I can check if taken or not. I just cant remember sometimes if ive taken it or not!!

I hope u are traveling ok good vibes your way

Love beetle

[Neil_1]

Hi Beetle

Sunday evening and just seeing how your weekend went for you.

That's a very good idea for numbering your pack - or even write down the abbreviated day of the week on them, so when you check you can see if for instance, Sunday's is gawn?

And yes I can totally understand your missing your tablets - I did find it odd though that they wouldn't allow you to take your one tablet on the day of your procedure;  surely just to swallow it down, perhaps even without water would have been ok.  But I guess they're the specialists and I am but a mere sufferer, who out of interest has had around 20 operations during my time on this earth.

I would like to think now that with you back on your tablet taking on a consistent basis that you'll be in a much better mind-set and hopefully your upcoming week at work will be an "ok" one.

Kind regards

Neil