Should I get a new referral?

[AlexH]

Hi, so. In my 20s here and trying to get an ADHD diagnosis. I have already been to my GP and got a referral to a doctor who could assess me. However, that was almost a year ago now.

The delay was due to a) my anxiety at having to call up during work hours, while at work, and then ask for time off, b) self-doubt overtaking again, c) anxiety over leaving it for so long, d) classic ADHD-style procrastination.

Should I get a new referral, or will that one still work? I’m really worried it’s going to look like I don’t need a diagnosis since I left it for so long, and I’m really anxious now because I don’t know what I’d do if this avenue’s been messed up, too.

I’ve already had bad experiences trying to get people to take me seriously, but over time by symptoms have only gotten worse and it’s becoming really clear that this IS impacting on my life a lot. It’s too late to do this part right but I don’t know if I should even try to set up an appointment today like this - I really don’t want to waste anyone’s time by trying if I need a new referral.

Anyone have any ideas?

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi AlexH,

Thank you for your post and for your question.

Unfortunately, all MHCP (Mental Health Care Plan) referrals only last for 12 months, so you will need to get another referral. With that said though, I can guarantee you that you will not be the only one getting a new referral having not used the last one. All of your reasons for not using one are valid - sometimes people get referrals for psychologists and decide that making that first appointment is too hard or they're not ready for it yet. That doesn't mean their reason for getting an appointment is no longer valid or no longer matters.

I hope that you won't let that fear stop you; like IsaJett said, I think you'll feel like it's worth doing it in the long-term. 🙂

RT

[AlexH]

Thank you both for the advice! I actually do just have less than 12 months to go (I got the referral in late November - maybe Christmas preparations distracted me?) so I guess I'll at least make a try with it! It's definitely a relief to know I'm not the only one who takes my time with these!

Just hope I can keep up this courage, haha. But I will try my best!

[AlexH]

RIP :') It turns out the guy I got a referral for isn't accepting any new appointments right now. Booked out til the middle of next year. So I definitely will need to get another referral. Hopefully that one will work, though who knows when I'll be able to actually get it done.

NGL I'm incredibly frustrated right now. I've spent so LONG building up to this and finally felt like I was making progress. It's just such a DIFFICULT system. The whole point is that we're bad at this stuff!! Why do I need to push myself so hard just to even get assessed??

And this is so many times of mentioning it to counsellors or therapists and getting 'no you aren't lol' within 20 minutes of knowing me. (Weirdly, after meeting me for a few sessions, they always seemed a lot less skeptical???) After being given one kind of super short assessment test by someone who clearly didn't know anything about ADHD and couldn't explain any of the questions, one of which I now know I answered wrongly because I had no idea what it was trying to ask and overthought it. After specifically asking my old GP to refer me to someone who can assess ADHD and actually being sent to an anxiety therapist - something I only found out halfway through the (expensive!!) session, during which she heard that I can't drive or hold conversations without difficulty and just shrugged and said she didn't hear anything to be concerned about.

And I knew it was a possibility that this referral wouldn't work out but I finally felt hope that the future was in my grasp for once and it sucks that it was taken away for reasons outside of my control AGAIN.

ugh. I will go to the doctor and get a new referral. But it's just depressing. I've had SO MUCH TROUBLE finding work (actually currently unemployed with nothing on the horizon again) and once again it's a case where the difference between pushing myself and doing the right thing versus doing nothing is just... non-existent, over and over again. I was trying to do this so I could get better at that and not need to push myself so hard to do that. But even here you can do it right but just: nope! Nothing available.

ugh. just needed to vent for a moment.

[Nurse_Jenn]

Hi AlexH,

It is great to see you here on the forum and am glad you are finding it a safe place to vent. There is a lot to vent about when talking about the 'system'. Your frustrations in trying to find help in the very confusing system are shared by many. It is great to see that you know that steps that you need to take even through you are having to take them twice. I am sorry you are going through such a tough time getting clarity and support in your diagnosis and assessment. This is so frustrating and I can tell you with great certainty that you are not alone in your struggles to get the right support, the first time.

By revisiting your GP and getting a new referral hopefully you will be able to find a specialist practitioner that can see you sooner than mid next year. I wonder if you have any supports you are accessing in the mean time? Using some relaxation techniques such as mindfulness can often be of help when you are struggling to focus. There is an app called Smiling Mind that can get you started. Mindfulness is challenging and takes some time to get the hang of but over a period of time, many people have found it helpful in giving their brain some time to switch off and rest, even if it is only for a few minutes.

Sometimes talking to someone can be helpful and I wonder if you have any friends or family members to help you on your journey towards healing? In any case, we are listening so please feel free to vent. The forum is a safe place to do this and you will find support in many of the threads. I wish you the best in gaining employment, getting a new referral and seeing a specialist so you can get some clarity on your symptoms.

Wishing you the best possible outcome,
Nurse Jenn