First Session...confused not sure??

[Justanothermum]

Hi all

I had my first session today with a pshycologist and im just not sure if it will work for me. I walked out and sat in the car wondering maybe i cant fix this anxiety/depression stuff and it will forever be this way. Is it normal to feel like that?

The lady was very nice and friendly and i didnt feel judged at all but at times i felt awkward and didnt know what to say and she sort of just sat there.

She gave me a few tips and asked me what my goals are but im just not sure.

I guess what iam wondering has anyone with anxiety/depression have success stories with speaking to a phsycologist like has it worked for you.

I will keep going for a few more weeks and see how i go but at $120 a session (i do get some back from medicare) i want to have some hope it can work.

any advice would be really appreciated thanks! 💙

[Birdy77]

Hi Justanothermum 😊

Seen you around, nice to talk to you on your own thread.

That's an awesome achievement, having your first session! Good for you, having the courage to step out and do that.

Please don't be discouraged. Sometimes it can take a few attempts to find the right therapist. And sometimes even if you have found the right therapist, sometimes it takes a few sessions to realise this and to feel comfy. It doesn't always click straight away, and that's ok.

If you don't know what your goals are, don't worry. Maybe choose some really simple, really achievable goals at first. Sometimes though, we just don't know, and that too is ok. But if you try break it down into smaller bits it might help. Whether it's to be able to get through the day without crying or being able to get to the shops on my own, or being able to clean the bathroom in one go ... goals don't have to be big ... just what works for you.

I ended up finding a psychotherapist whom i really clicked with, but at first it was still very awkward and strange, and maybe that's just natural. I've had one other psychologist and i never clicked with her so i moved on. But i know it can feel deflating at first.

Congratulations on getting out there and looking after you 😊

🌻birdy

[Justanothermum]

Hi birdy

I have also seen you on a few other threads and you always seem to have such awesome helpful advice!

Thanks for replying to my thread and the words of encouragement i really appreciate the advice the tip about small goals is such a good idea!

💙

[Sad_Mushroom]

Hi Justanothermum,

It's not like you see on TV.

For me it got better. It certainly gets easier to open up and remember the important bits (I used to write them on my wrist so I didn't forget but then I used to feel like I was cheating) I also used to get nervous and say odd stuff, then I'd get the giggles.

Take your time with it all and remember why you are there. Keep notes through the week (between visits) if you need, just to record anything you feel you should mention. There's nothing worse than walking out of an appointment and going 'aaaah! I forgot' The notes will also help if you find you don't 'click' with this one and chose another.

It's about looking after you, the more involved you are, the better your chances. (involved isn't the right word but I can't think of the word atm, it's close though)

SM

[Birdy77]

My pleasure Justanothermum,

It really can take time for the rapport to start happening with the psycholgist.

Also, I've found that it can take a few sessions to really sift through the surface stuff and get down to the nitty gritty, the stuff you need to really work though. So give it some time if you can.

It's good that you found her nice and that you didn't feel judged. I know psychologists are not supposed to be judgemental at all, but it can happen, a friend of mine started seeing a therapist and felt judged about her sexuality so that concluded that avenue for help which was a real shame, but thankfully she found someone else to see.

You asked if people had success stories ... well i went to see a therapist initially because i had just come out of a damaging, emotionally abusive relationship and i pretty much had a melt down. Couldn't function properly, couldn't sleep, just broken.

Went to get some help ... such relief that someone validated me for a start, but i felt, like you at the beginning i don't knkw if this will work.

But then what happened was she was able to guide me on a journey of discovery pretty much about why i had got myself into this horrendous relationship in the first place (ie the nitty gritty).

Uncovered all sorts of painful but necessary details about my childhood etc and it helped me to start to heal wounds i didn't know were there. And to start developing some less dysfunctional (sometimes even functional!) ways of relating and being.

If i hadn't gone through that with her? I'd have probably gone back to the abusive relationship or started with another similar person.

Instead, i started to learn to care for myself and have compassion for myself and that led me to make healthier relationship decisions.

Sorry if that was too much detail, but that is part of my story, and please don't feel discouraged. 😊

🌻birdy