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struggling with special needs children

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
Does anyone else have children with special needs.I am struggling with mine.My youngest cant use a toilet when their at the age they should be.I am getting tired of changing them,does that make me a bad parent?The constant hyperepisodes are taking their strain especially that i am going through other personal stuff in my life
716 Replies 716

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Feeling depressed after my son asked me why I married his mother as I gave him Autism.His mother told him it was my fault he had autism.He dosnt want to have Autism and blames me now.

Community Member

Don't be too hard on yourself but don't be too hard on the children either. You guys will work though it together 🙂

Hi mark, not sure if u still hang about these parts but wanted to check in and see how things are for you


Sleepy here back visiting after being away.

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi sleepy it is great to see you again on here.I haven't been on here for awhile.I have been busy with kids and stuff.My daughter has finished school and her course at Tafe and now volunteers at the rspca.My son is in his last year of primary school and is still struggling with some things.Trying to work out where to send him for high school next year.I would like to send him to the special needs school but it a fair distance away for us.The local high school has things in place for special needs kids and would work at his level.                     

I hope you are doing ok and it was great to hear from you.And I am always here to listen.

Take care Mark.

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi Hanna I hope you find my thread ok.Things are really going great for my daughter.I am so proud of her getting  her licence and she passed first attempt.I was in the car with her as a support person as you can get one if you get a letter from your doctor.I wasn't allowed to talk or react in anyway.It was one of the most stressful things I have done and felt like I was doing the test myself.

A rescue dog would be lovely for you.Dogs are such great companions and give you unconditional love.when I looked at the dogs where my daughter works they were mostly bigger dogs and usually crossed working dogs.They do ocassionly have small ones like poodles, chiauhas and sausage dogs.Always something different coming in.

A big change for my son next year and getting nervous about the big change for him.He has had 3 induction days at the high school so he will know where everything is and know what to expect.

Very dry here and the air has been filled with smoke at times.I am ok here at the moment from the fires.The forecast is for rain tomorrow so hoping that comes.

Take care,


Hi Matchy

It really is lovely to see you around here again & with such great news about your daughter getting her driver's licence - I trust you all celebrate such 'milestone' achievements. 

It's also good to hear your son has had 3 induction days at the new school. & so long as he feels comfortable enough to ask for help from teachers or even some students he could be introduced to, I'm sure he'll soon settle in. 



Hi Mark, just found you and writing this so I can find you more easily again.  Thanks for the information about the dogs where your daughter works - yes there are so many lovely big dogs needing a home but I can only manage something fairly small...it is going to take a while to find one but they say that is better or else the dog is always compared to your previous one.


There's a big new step coming up for your son with high school coming up - how does he feel about it Mark, is he looking forward to it?  I would imagine it's also quite anxieyt-provoking - I actually still remember how anxious I was the first morning of high school in my new uniform and hat and feeling very strange!  


A few more challenges ahead for you as Dad, Mark, but you have dealt so well with them and you will continue to do so I know - but do take care of yourself too.  


I seem to remember you had some land and were growing some vegetables etc - if I am right, how is it going?


I'll try to come by later on, I still find these forums come up with the earliest post first and I have to scroll for ages to find the current comments!  Also no word count is really tricky!


You're doing well Mark!

PS:  Taking little Sam to be put down at the vet's was one of the hardest things I have ever done Mark - it was so horrible to take him to have his life ended, but at the end he was so sick - when the vet found what was wrong (Cushings and severe diabetes she said must have started only recently but it was so severre it was not treatable) she was going to put him down on the spot but I took him home for one night - he lay on the grass while I talked with the neighbours and he seemed to enjoy that - he ate a few of his favourite treats - and then he just shut down.  I told him how much I loved him.  Next morning the neighbours all came by to say goodbye to him, which was so nice of them.  Then my friend came and we wrapped him in warm blankets and took him to the vet.  It was a very peaceful end for him, I gave him a sedative pill at home as the vet told me and he was  so sleepy he really didn't know where he was.  I collected his ashes a few days ago, so he is back with me where he always felt safe.


I wonder how does your daughter deal with the unwanted dogs at the shelter, especially any that have to be put down? 


Thanks for reading this Mark.

Bi Hanna it is one of the hardest thing to do having your beloved pet put down.I have done it to to a beautiful dog called Sasha a Ridgeback x staff.She had cancer that spread fast.One of the hardest things I have ever done and still puts a tear in my eye thinking about it even though it was over 20 years ago.My daughters rspca dose not have a vet there and take them out to an independent vet.They are building a surgery and hope to have one on site in the near future.

On a happier note it is raining here really good steady rain.My tanks were getting very dry.I do grow my own vegies and have a lovely crop of corn which should be ready to harvest in another month.I also growing pumpkins,watermelons,eggplants,potatoes,carrots and beans.I have a nice crop of apples on my tree.

My son is nervous about going to high school.I think he is glad to be going and finishing primary school.

Just remembering a friend who had a pet cremated put some of the ashes in a locket and wore it close to heart.

I seem to be looking after myself ok these days.I like to work out in the garden or do some work on my motorbike that I am doing up.

I find since they did the changes to this site that it has become a bit tricky.

Take care,


Hi Mark,


It must be a good feeling to grow some of your own food!  It's nice to be a bit self-sufficient especially in these expensive times.  The corn sounds lovely!


You have a motorbike?  I just got hold of a movie DVD from an op shop here with Anthony Hopkins, called The World's Fastest Indian about a man who decides to take his bike to the Bonneville Salt Flats race in Utah.  I haven't watched it yet but it has great reviews.  Where I lived before they had regular meetings of people with vintage motorcycles - some of them looked fantastic - the guys do them up and they were just beautiful.  There was also a group of older men who rode motorbikes - they used to have a trip to my town and have a get together in one of the cafes - it looked like they had a lot of fun!  It's still my dream to one day have a ride on a Harley!  I think they are wonderful.


It's kind of you to chat with me about putting poor Sam down.  It's heartbreaking isn't it?  


Your son will probably be anxious for his first couple of days at high school and hopefully then he will settle in - it's a big change.  You are a very supportive Dad and I am sure that is a big help.  


Have you ever ridden a Harley, Mark?  I also have a movie called The Motorcycle Diaries but I haven't watched it yet, it's supposed to be excellent.  I love classic and vintage cars and motorbikes!  


It's threatening to storm here - it's only late afternoon but the sky is already quite dark and the atmosphere is oppressive.  I'll be relieved when we have a good thunderstorm to clear the air.  


It's so nice chatting with you Mark!