should I talk to hubby's family?

[my1253]

I'm pretty sure my husband has depression.   Should I talk to his family about it?  They have no idea.  I'm not sure how to deal with this by myself.

[white knight]

Hi my, welcome to beyond blue forums

In one word - No.

However, IMO I would tackle it this way. Talk to your doctor about it. Then find a way to see reason for both of you to attend your doctor on the premise maybe, that you are not coping well.

Half way through the meeting bring up that your husband is acting like someone depressed. When the doctor discusses this topic with your husband the best thing you can do is only speak when you are spoken to. eg keep quiet. Allow the doctor to do his thing.

Any talk done through his family could be seen as betrayal.

Tony WK

[Pixie15]

Hi my1253,

Welcome to the forums. It is good that you thought to seek out some information before acting. If your husband has depression and you want to help him I think that it is important that you try to keep your relationship on friendly terms.

If your spoke to your husbands family without his knowledge and agreement I think this would be a breach of trust and not likely to be helpful. If your husband is going to get help he needs to do it on a voluntary basis. It is not a good idea to try and diagnose your partner. I have been caught up in doing this and it just lead to confusion and time wasting.

There is information on the site here that is for carers and suggestions for having the conversation you might want to have a look at this.

Is there a reason that you wanted to speak to his family? Are you afraid to approach him to discuss it on your own? Do you think it is going to be difficult for him to accept if he is diagnosed? 

If you feel comfortable sharing more information on your situation you might get some more useful feedback.

Cheers,

Grateful.