I'm really exhausted psychologically and emotionally. I think I'm setting a deadline in my head for things to get better, or I'll have to leave.

[Violet12]

Sometimes I think I'm codependent. How do we tell the line between caring/supporting codependence, absorbing their emotions, and letting it totally affect us? I'd really like to hear others' thoughts on that.

So I'm here I suppose for a venting sesh. My partner is on a waitlist to see a psychiatrist early next year for an assessment to see whether he has ADHD. All signs indicate that he does. I am praying that we can afford that appointment when it comes, which is really iffy, and that we can then also get medication - and, that the medication makes serious improvements. Because... I'm so tired. I'm so over this.

I love him. I do not blame him. He did not ask to be this way. But I also did not sign up for this. I think that if the medication doesn't work out, and if he then doesn't actively try in therapy, I might have to leave for my own sake. The emotional rollercoaster, his inability to self-soothe, just everything... It sometimes feels like there's not enough oxygen in this relationship for me. It feels like our relationship has become one where I anticipate and manage and react to his moods, and he feels guilty and hates himself for it but nothing ever changes. Every day since the pandemic last year that kicked this into another level, I feel like I wake up and my day depends on his mood. Will I get to get some work done, maybe think about myself for a few hours, get some housework done? Depends if he has an emotional outburst or not and tells me he hates himself and wishes he had the guts to end his life. It's at least 3 out of 7 days a week lately. I can't do it. I'll wait to see if the medication helps but if it doesn't I'm going to have to leave. How I'll do that knowing he'll be suicidal, I have no idea. But I can't give up my life to sit next to him on the floor.

[adasmith]

Feeling mentally and emotionally exhausted is an overwhelming experience. Setting a deadline for improvement is a sign of your strength and resilience, recognizing the need for change. Remember, it's crucial to prioritize self-care and seek support with a mental health therapist difficult times. Don't hesitate to talk to friends, family, or a professional to share your burden and explore solutions. Instead of viewing your deadline as an ultimatum, see it as a motivating factor to take proactive steps towards healing and growth. Life's journey is unpredictable, and with proper care and support, brighter days are within reach. You deserve happiness and peace.