I am scared and lost about my wifes depression

[Barty174]

Hi peeps,

This is a first for me but I am struggling. My wife of 22yrs has recently been diagnosed with moderate depression. I love her so much and I am struggling and hurting bad. I am doing my best to support and care for her. We walk 10km a day and I try to open up to her but she never opens up to me. She says shes "numb inside". When I hug her and tell her I love her there is nothing.. She feels nothing.. She has a good friend network and lots of support amd lots of love pouring in, but me, nothing..I pray everyday for a glimmer of love, a spark to occur but I am struggling so much. I feel alone in this. I dont want to loose my wife. I have always pictured us 80 with heaps of grandkids.. Will she ever love me again? I am so sad trying to hold it all together and be strong including seeing my own psych for help.. Unfortunately I have realised I am only human. A lost lonely one at that... What can I do? Will she ever come back to me?

[Nikkir]

Hi Barty174,

Thank you for your post, my heart goes out to you. It must be so difficult and frustrating to try to reach out to connect to the person you love and they are not responding. Depression is a very real diagnosis and I know it may be hard to see and understand but often the person is suffering and they aren't even aware or capable of seeing another person's point of view or connecting with those they love. For me personally, I would try to find out all I could about depression just so you know that it isn't all you, there are many symptoms. I think it is great that you are seeing someone for yourself and have support. I love that you want to be by her side, she is very lucky.

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/supporting-someone/supporting-someone-with-depression-or-anxiety

Here is a link from our website about supporting someone with depression. You can always reach out to our DR KIM on Beyond Blue and call us on 1300 22 4636 or chat to us online. Make sure that you take care of yourself as well and we would love to chat to you if you feel like it or let us know if there is any resources or support we could provide. I wish you all the best, Nikkir

[Barty174]

I will definitely be taking beyondblue for the chat.. Thanks so much.. She has said its not me..her therapist has said it looks like she burnt out from work.. 70hr weeks as a dedicated school teacher.. But of course family and my work roster as a FIFO has played a part as well.. I have read all I can so far.. I have tried encouraging her to read about it herself.. She says she has no interest in it and just wants the meds to start to work.. I hope they do.. Just enough to see some grit to fight this monster as its hard to do it alone.

[Chris_B]

Hi everyone, this thread is a double-up so we're going to close it off to avoid confusion. You can continue your conversation in the other version of this thread below:

I am scared and lost about my wifes depression