How to support my anxious boyfriend

[sunflower01]

Hi everyone!

I'm a new member and was hoping I'd get some advice on how to deal and support my boyfriend who suffers greatly from anxiety. Over the years, I've slowly learnt what and what not to do/say in some situations. He has seen many councillors in his life but always goes back to his anxious ways. My boyfriend is prone to overthink everything, especially in scenarios where he is torn between doing the "rational" thing or doing what will make him and myself happy. I'm worried about the things I say to him will cause him to overthink again and take him back to a dark place. He has thought about suicide, to which I'm still struggling to let go of, even though he has moved on. I am trying really hard to there for him, but I feel useless. I've read articles on anxiety and spoken to his close relatives to see how they deal with it. I want to provide the best support I can by being there and loving him, but I become irritated when I think he is being too irrational and too emotional. I hope someone can please help me. I would really appreciate all the help I can get. thank you!

[Doolhof]

Hi Sunflower01,

Welcome to the community here. It is admirable that you want to help your boyfriend and support him. You mentioned you have read information on anxiety, if you would like to read more, the Beyond Blue website has information on how we can help people who experience anxiety.

I'm wondering if you boyfriend has learnt some strategies to help him cope with his anxiety when it arises? I sometimes find deep slow breathing helps and telling myself that I am okay. Could you try to do this with your boyfriend when he is becoming anxious?

Have you tried talking to a support worker at Beyond Blue or Life Line for ideas on how you can assist your boyfriend?

Sometimes just having someone reassure us they are there for us is a lot of help. As a person suffering from various mental health issues, I know there are some days when nothing seems to help no matter how hard I try.

Hope you can both find some answers and strategies.

Cheers from Dools