Depressed boyfriend suddenly like a different person

[Wambianna]

My BF of 3 years, (we are in our 60s) has had several boughts of depression, lasting usually about 36 hours, since Ive known him. He sleeps and goes into no communication mode.

I am on a 4 day birdwatching trip, alone, and he was quite ok with me going. But on the morning I left he said not to drop in on him as he needed to be alone. I felt sick. But took him at his word. While Ive been away he has rung twice , sounding sleepy and hardly talking, but sort happy to be in contact.

But between these calls Ive had 2 texts from him accusing me of talking about his "mental health problems" to everyone and asking me very angrily to stop.He says he doesnt have the energy to discuss it. Of course, I have spoken to my sister about my worries around him but he can't know that. He has never been like this...nasty, blunt and paranoid. I don't understand him attacking me...is he finished with me? Im so confused.

[Sophie_M]

 
HI Wambianna,

Welcome to the Forums and thank you for sharing with us. Our community is full of lovely people who can relate to some of what you’re going through.  
 
It sounds like while he has had episodes of depression in the past, he has not acted this way towards you during any of those times which could understandably be very upsetting.
Since last week, has there been any changes in how things have been? We can imagine how tough this must be feeling with the amount of concern and care that you have for your boyfriend.

If you ever want to talk about anything you are going through, you can reach out to the lovely Beyond Blue counsellors any time, on 1300 22 4636, available 24/7, or you can speak to them on webchat here. 
 
Thanks again for sharing here. We’re sure you’ll hear from some other community members soon. We hope you can be as kind to yourself during this difficult time.
 
Kind regards, 
 
Sophie M