boyfriend admitted to mental health unit in hospital

[era1988]

Hi, 

My boyfriend who i live with has just been admitted. It has been a month long battle but i finally got him to go down to ED. i live in NSW and wasn't the most pleasant experience but we got the result we wanted. He was on a mental health plan with his GP but wasn't working for him and couldn't get regular appts with a psychologist. 

I just wanted to hear from other people who have gone through this process. How long was you/partner hospitalised? Was it a positive experience?

Im not sure where our relationship will go when he gets better, but thats all i care about, him getting better!

[HA1]

Hello Era!

Well done firstly to you and your boyfriend on taking the steps to see a GP, and secondly on recognising the signs of when it is necessary to take the next step by going to the ED.  From my experience, the second step takes a lot of courage.  I did neither. 

It took my wife to finally convince me to go and see a GP just before I was about to head off on a long drive.  I had stood fairly strong when I arrived at the GP, but within seconds become a complete wreck.  It took the GP about a minute to decide that I needed to be hospitalised immediately.  

Going to the ED was definitely the right step ..... and now I am very thankful.

Stayed in hospital only four nights, before given the 'option' of being admitted to the public ward or taking a spell in a private facility.  We did not have the health insurance cover for private, so my wife signed up as my 'carer' with plentiful of instructions from the doctors and staff.  (We now have the extra cover with our health insurer - just in case!)

I must say, that the four nights stay in ED was great!  Just what I needed (and frankly, I did not really want to leave).  Staff and doctors were fantastic.  For example, they knew that I just needed time alone and made sure I was given that space - but they kept peeking in day and night just to make sure I was OK. I left with deep gratitude.

The weeks and months after leaving hospital times where difficult - I needed the space that I'd had at hospital.  With the help and understanding of a wonderful partner, I somehow obtained that space in a household full of people.  If I had not before, I now realised the importance of having a partner to turn to for support - just a look in the eye, gentle words, holding hands and a cuddle.

You sound like a wonderful and caring girlfriend.  All the very best to you and your boyfriend.  Keep posting to let us know how you go.

Regards

K

[Snoman]

Hi Era1988,

I am fortunate that I haven't been hospitalised, so I can't really comment on that side of things.  Hopefully someone here who has can.  From what I have read though, it can vary, but mostly positive.

If your boyfriend is having trouble getting regular appointments with the psych, perhaps he might be better off with a different one?  Is he taking antidepressants, and if so, for how long?  Unfortunately they take quite some time to make a noticeable improvement, and there can be some rougher periods until they do.

Also, it is great to see that you want to help him.  It can be very difficult for the carer, so you need to make sure you have support too.  I can suggest looking through the info in the links above.  There is a PDF with lots of info for Family and Friends section of the Resources area.  Beyond Blue can even send you the material free of charge.

Sno

[era1988]

He has been seeing a psych and she wasn't really helping so asked gp to change got onto a new one but she had a 2-3 week wait. It came to the day of his appt and she cancelled because she was sick he needs to wait another 2 weeks to get in again. He has been on anti depressants for about 5 weeks. 

the hospital has been ok and it's only just been over 24hrs but he feels like he has not had much communication about his treatment. His private health did not cover him to go to a private hospital so he is in public at the moment. I hope that there is going to be benefits coming soon for him. He feels like he couldn't get help and we thought the hospital would be able to at least get him some psychiatrist and psychological help. Fingers crossed for the next few days.

[Snoman]

Era1988,

Looking back over my recovery period, I didn't know what to expect at the time, and may completely wrong assumptions.  When I see your boyfriend has only been on AD's for 5 weeks, I remember how I expected to feel much better by then.  I didn't.  I wanted a higher dose.  It didn't help straight away.  I wanted even higher, but not the side effects I was getting, so I changed to another type.  That kind of felt like a backward step as I had to let the first one wash out over a few weeks.  I now know that the first bit wasn't wasted.

During the first four months, I was on a tough roller coaster ride that took me right to the literal edge.  After that, the dips slowly got shallower.

Treatment takes time.

While he is in the hospital, are there things he can do to exercise his mind?  Can you bring him some puzzles?  Memory and concentration diminish from depression, and memory/concentration games might help.  If nothing else, it could just be a helpful distraction.

Sno

[era1988]

cheers for the help. He was discharged a few days later and was feeling a lot more positive about things. It will still be a long road and the last few days he has been a bit down again. He's just a bit lost with his direction in life at the moment but he understands that he's got to make the changes for himself and he is making positive steps to move forward

[Joodi]

Hi era1988,

I too am the partner of someone who has been admitted into a mental health facility.

We're a young couple, together 6 years. He's my everything, my best friend.

He has always struggled with mental health issues (even if he doesn't think so) & in the last few year's alcohol & gambling.

3 years ago my partner was on a night out & i was at home. He came home later that night, we had an huge argument.

He'd broken my heart that night & i think his own, for reasons we won't get into. I didn't sleep a wink that night.

Morning had come & i must've dosed off, i remember feeling him move out of the bed he'd gone to the bathroom.

Next second i hear him say my name, i faintly open my eye's & i see my boy standing there covered in blood.

I remember this day like it was yesterday. He'd intend to take his own life.

I got him to the hospital via Sydney public transport. (Not my first idea of transport)

I had no idea what to except, what was going to happen. I don't think i was really focusing on anything other then getting to the hospital as fast as we could.

He was admitted & on suicide watch. He was in and out for the next 4 months.

I felt numb every single day, i was so drained & confused my whole world was crumbling. But i soldiered on for him, just like him for me.

You have to stay strong, there is nothing more powerful then love & support.

I had plesant experience's & awful experience's within that 4 months. Connect with his doctors & nurse's, this makes the process a lot easier.

I am writing on your post today, because 4 day's ago today after 3 year's my partner has been admitted into a mental health facility.

Thing's i guess have been rocky with everything the last couple of months & it's taken it's toll on my partner.

He suggested he needed to go to the hospital & get some help.

His mother & I took him in where he was admitted. His medication is now charted properly & correct dosages.

We're only on day 4, but i am really hoping he can get the counselling & therapy he so desperately needs.

As i said earlier, love & support will get you through anything.

I hope you & your partner are going strong together.

Joodi xx