Thoughts on Voices?

[ChildHeart]

I am wondering what everybody’s thoughts are on what is more and less common in regards to voices in the head? I am going to word this as sensitively as I can but I do apologise if I offend anybody as that is not my intent.  

I have them still only sometimes, but I used to have them frequently. My voices are myself but speaking to me I guess like a bad friend or the devil on the shoulder. I’m posting this here because they would mostly occur when I was having su*cidal thoughts. An example being “stop being a coward. You know this is what you want”…etc. Would you say this is more or less common? I’m trying to determine if these “voices” so-to-speak are a cause for concern? 

When I think about what I would consider voices that would be concerning on a mental health level I think of hearing voices that sound unfamiliar as in, not like me? Whilst I do think I have experienced voices that say things I might not normally say to myself, I still hear them

in my voice as an internal thought and not sounding like something external.

[therising]

Hi ChildHeart

The 'You' factor's definitely an interesting one, incredibly fascinating in my opinion. For example, you can say 'I just don't know what to do anymore' and suddenly what may come to mind is 'You need to calm down. You need to breathe' or 'You need to find someone to talk to'. So, it goes from 'I' to 'You'. I'd say it's more like hearing words rather than hearing voices. Where the words come from, I don't exactly know, but what I do know is they will either be positive or negative, helpful or unhelpful. They can be incredibly inspiring or incredibly depressing. I've found there are a variety of camps regarding where people imagine the dialogue comes from. Some of those camps, when it comes to the positive vs the negative

• The inner sage vs the inner pessimist, the inner risk taker vs the inner overly cautious fearful non risk taker and so on. In other words, certain facets of our self can be dictating or battling it out at times
• The divine vs the not so divine. Some folk will pray or meditate in the hope of hearing the 'You' factor in positive response (aka divine guidance). Along these lines is what's known as Clairaudience (aka clear hearing)
• Certain parts of the brain vs other parts. With the mind defined as 'the brain at work', it's a matter of 'What part of the brain is responsible for this way of thinking (this dialogue) and what part's responsible for that way of thinking (that dialogue)?'

The list goes on.

I think, where we imagine the words are coming from is what creates the filter. Me, I'm a girl who's a serious romantic at heart. While I can imagine there are aspects of me battling it out at times, I also like to imagine there's some form of divine guidance out there somewhere. Let's simply call it 'The powers that be'. I'll do my best to filter things through this. The words that come to mind at times are either divine or they're not (sometimes far from it). I choose to imagine this because it's something that works for me. It's how I've come to manage depression at times. I think a lot can be achieved through what we choose to imagine.

As I say, definitely a fascinating topic and quite a philosophical one at times. Not a lot of people recognise the 'You' factor.

[ChildHeart]

Thank you for acknowledging that, the rising. I do love to get philosophical but I’m quite the spiritualist so I most definitely understand the “clairs”. I actually read tarot and I’ve come far over the years from where I started where I was basically just trying to read the card less intuitively and more straight from the book but now i’m completely intuitive when I read and in terms of downloads (channeling) I will pick up a line here or there as I’m tuning in on a radio and there’s static and then suddenly something there. When this happens (and I don’t channel like other tarot reader yet who can seem to reel off a so many things all at once as if they have almost been possessed by a spirit guide lol but I’ll receive it as a private thought to where when it occurs, it will sound something like me having sudden inspiration, that “ah-ha” moment. 

But these other voices, well, the best way I can decide the “you” without going into something su*cide related, is to say that, they come in the form of a conversation almost but this is the best example I can give.

“Hmm what should I have for dinner? Curry or Pasta?”

”Well, you had pasta recently so I guess it’s curry.”

”yes, but I don’t feel like curry tonight”

”you had pasta the other night. You’ll have to have curry or it’s too much of the same!”

I think you’re right on the importance of deciphering the negative or positive despite the manner in which these thoughts or voices are received. 

[therising]

Hi ChildHeart

I've always wanted to master the tarot yet never had enough patience plus I suppose my interests took me in a different direction. That's fantastic how it comes so easily to you, through a lot of practice of course. Practice makes perfect.

Yep, don't know where the dark dialogue comes from either but what I do know is it can get extremely dark. Let's just say 'It comes from that dark place', whatever that place is. Call it what you will. And yes, absolutely, I can have full on conversations with whatever it is that comes from that dark place. If I was to have those 2 way conversations out loud, people would definitely look at me with great concern. We tend to have them silently though, in a way where no one can hear the suffering but us.

Can be seriously hard to observe those dark words, simply observe them and acknowledge 'I know exactly where this is coming from and I refuse to engage in it'. Before you know it, it can have you hooked, believing in all the lies and misguidance that comes from it, leaving you to say 'I swore I'd never get sucked into it again. What's wrong with me?'.

As you'd know, there's high level and low level vibration, with high level being the one you tune into with the tarot. The challenge is to get out of low and into high. A massive challenge at times. There are channelers who can get stuck in lower levels for a number of reasons (serious exhaustion, depressing circumstances/challenges, being surrounded by people who bring them down etc). They may consult other channelers who can see (clairvoyance), hear (clairaudience) etc how to get them out. Eg: a clairvoyant will go and consult someone who can see for them, when they can't see for themself. 

[ChildHeart]

Thank you for the insight, you are very wise! I am sorry if this gets off topic being as I did post this in the su*cide section, but in regards to the high and low vibrations it’s like I can be in a high vibration for the people I am reading for, and I can have many words of wisdom for them, but I can’t seem to do that for myself. I work so hard to try get myself in that positive energy to benefit me, but it’s like I can do the high vibe for others, just not so much for myself. An example would be that I can do a reading, be super happy and positive (should the reading go that way) and then when it’s done it’s like I just go back to being in the energy I was (most likely low vibrational) before I started the reading. 

This is may sound  ironic or even silly, but I started a podcast doing motivational speaking and have been trying to get a project going (I guess with us not being allowed to give away personal details I can say what it’s called) but I love trying to spread joy and make people happy. I want to help those who have struggled like I have, and I think to my family perhaps especially (although my sibling doesn’t give my projects the time of day he just keeps saying I’ll look at it later and never does), it’s a confusing contrast to them because here I am projecting something to people that I myself I guess technically am not. It’s like I can’t seem to follow my own advice even if it’s actually something that’s good and helpful. I just do it for others then go back to my melancholy and despair. It’s like I can come out with all this positive insight for others and then when all is said and done, I get the sadness and seeing as yes we are talking about voices, the voices that want to constantly put me down or try to tell me how everybody else sees me in a negative way. 

IN THE PAST not current. I used to write a lot of su*cide notes. But it wasn’t so much for intent it was a release of emotions. Deep down I would know that I’m not going to act on this, but it felt good to write them. Almost to know that I had them

ready to go if I needed them. But the voice inside me as I would write them would always say things like “stop writing these and take action! You’re just procrastinating” blah blah and most of the time I would say back no shut up let me write this and then I guess I would a feel a little better having let it all out then I would go back to what I was doing. 

[therising]

Hi ChildHeart

I've heard it said before that those who are here to do good in this world, bring light to others, can be tormented in a number of ways into stopping that. Kinda of like if you're no longer here how can you do any good. Whether that's the case, not sure. Plenty of theories out there.

Can't help but wonder whether you're graduating. What I mean is maybe having mastered the tarot, you're graduating beyond that level but there's some resistance when it comes to letting go of relying on the tarot to be able to do that. Maybe next level could involve doing readings for people without the tarot as a resource. Could you possibly be at a graduation point of some kind? Could that graduation point be linked in some way to starting the podcasts? For example, in order for the podcasts to be super successful and reach as many people as possible, is there some specific ability or set of abilities you need to develop in the process?

I know of a particular mainstream writer who is known to have said something along the lines of 'When I write my books, I simply take dictation. I don't know where it all comes from but what I do know is I need to write down what I hear when I begin to hear it'. Rumor has it Mozart was similar. It's said he gave credit to whatever led him to hear and see music so clearly and so easily, whatever it was that gave those notes to him. It's said that while channeling such compositions so intensely, nothing could shift his focus out of that channel of inspiration. Lots of people in history who give credit to that which naturally inspires them.

[ChildHeart]

Perhaps you are right on the graduating/leveling up type scenario and ai certainly wish I could channel without cards! But I’m not at that stage yet however, I have been told that I have a connection to the ascended masters (I will assume from your previous posts that you know what I mean when I say that) and I have tried meditating and doing that, but I’m sadly never in a place of quiet and never alone when I want to be lol. As in, I live with a flat mate. If I go out to be by myself for some peace and quiet that never happens as I am a magnet for people. I am an empath which is hard enough as it is but people act like they know me when we have never met or they see me as somebody that can help them. So they will either approach me and say I look familiar and then go crazy trying to figure out how they know me when we have never met and they keep saying “it’s your face it’s, your face” and then there’s the poeple that just come straight up to me for directions, recommendations, people who ask me where things are in aisles and then after helping them I lose track of what I was doing.

There’s even a lady in my street who had an aneurysm and so she can’t remember anything and asks the same questions over and over again. Well my day started late in the end because she saw me walking past her house and asked if she could come for a walk with me and she kept asking the same two questions over and over the whole walk and people were saying to me that they would have made an excuse and walked away but as I said, I can’t do that, I’m not that person and even though she asked the same two questions over and over I answered them repeatedly with a smile until I walked her back home. 

My point is, there’s something I guess I have known that I am supposed to be doing to help people and I guess you could say it’s clear some see that too, even if it’s in strange ways or they can’t put their finger on it. But it’s also my problem because it drains me and effects my depression, I get anxiety from my family because they don’t understand my purpose and keep pressuring me to do a 9-5 that I know is a waste of time for me and then I end up getting sometimes to the point of “s” because it’s all too overwhelming but then somebody will randomly appear in my life much like you and the people on this forum to tell me to keep going. 

[therising]

Hi ChildHeart

Lighthouse or magnet to many, you simply sound amazing. I bet you even amaze yourself at times.

Life can definitely be noisy. Does my head in at times. My favourite time of the day is around 4am within the peace and quiet of my back yard. No one's awake, no one's asking for anything, no one's around to judge. It's the most peaceful and relaxed time of the day for me. Then daylight hits, the traffic in the distance starts up and life's every day demands start rolling in. When people say to me 'Why would you want to get up at 4am?', my response is 'Why would I not (with that being the feeling it gives me)?'. I find it's the best time to mediate too, on solutions or guidance when it comes to certain problems or challenges.

Took me a long time to recognise when is the best time to meditate in such a way. When people say 'Why is my torturous inner dialogue at its worst in the early hours of the morning or the late hours of the evening?', it is simply the best time to hear what comes to mind. The upside, you hear at times what you really need to hear. The downside, you hear at times what you really don't need to hear, such as the incredibly dark and depressing stuff. These are typically times when the good and the not so good dialogue's at its loudest, when there's nothing and no one to drown it out or act as a distraction.

With you being busy raising everyone around you, who raises you? Who's your 'go to' person? You got a masseuse who helps release all your accumulated tension? How about a serious adventurer, who raises you through helping you add ventures to life, helping bring out new facets of you that you never knew existed? How about someone who reads your cards on occasion? Lighthouses can't run on zero fuel and without being cared for.

[ChildHeart]

Hi again, therising! 

Wow, good on you for the 4am wake ups. I should maybe try to do that sometime, see how it goes. I’m usually up at 6 lol. 

I actually do binaural beats if you know them and mediate to those? They can be helpful but sometimes not even those can wind me down like I need or calm me in the way I need. They do work though when my mind isn’t on overload. Lol. 

Actually, I just got off a chat here with one of the counsellors and was saying that sadly no I don’t have anybody. There’s still some family in my life but not somebody that I can turn to who can support me in the way I need. I don’t have any friends anymore either. 

[therising]

Hi ChildHeart

Binaural beats, brilliant! Thanks for reminding me. Looked into that some time ago. Even bought good quality headphones but it fell by the wayside. So much can fall by the wayside in life as we move forward in finding all the ways that serve others. Sometimes, it's only in hindsight that we can see many of the ways where we could have devoted time to serving our self more.

Could it be time to find a circle? A brilliant man once said to me something along the lines of 'If you wish to develop in some way, find a circle of people who are going to lead you to develop'. Whether it's a circle of philosophers who love questioning and wondering about the nature of life and people, a circle of spiritualists who are into graduating to new understandings and abilities or a circle of nature lovers who love everything bush walking gives them, all are up for serving themselves and others in the group in so many constructive ways.

When I consider looking for a circle, the dialogue can start up and get quite bad if I'm not fully conscious of it...

• I wonder if that group would make a difference to me
• What makes you think they'd accept you? If you join, you know they're going to judge you
• But what if they do make a difference? What if I can make a difference to them?
• What makes you think you can make a difference to anyone?! You know what you're like, you're going to be all quite and shy like you usually are when meeting new people. They'll see you for the dysfunctional person you are

Blah, blah, blah.

On the flip side, with some positive guidance (as opposed to negative guidance steering me away from what may serve me)...

• These people may make all the difference and you don't want to miss out on that  opportunity. If the facilitator of the group is a good leader, they'll lead everyone in the group to feel comfortable. Those nerves you're feeling are your call to courage. Go for it!

I smile when I think of the last circle I joined, regarding a course in developing intuition, that ran over a couple of weekends. We were the shyest, quietest bunch of people you could possibly put together. By the end of it, we felt like we'd known each other for years. We had a great leader.