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Struggling at work

Keira2
Community Member

Hi,

So this is what is going on: In late 2017 my colleague resigned. We had both worked together on a particular job, and when she resigned they didn't get a replacement for a year so I was doing the job that used to be done by 2 people on my own. I went downhill very quickly under the workload, working crazy hours including some 16 hour shifts occasionally. I don't think people showed understanding that the job used to be done by 2 people and it seemed I couldn't do it well enough, the environment started to feel bad. Then when they finally did get someone in to help I had problems with her. I was still working really long hours, and it was really upsetting me to see her spending a really large portion of her day chatting and even taking 1.5 hour lunch break. I eventually began to show my annoyance and then things got even worse and everyone at work pretty much hates me. Things have been bad at work now for about 3 years. I am struggling very badly when I am at work with negative feelings. The feelings are so bad I think I need to end the pain and I am starting to plan that. The workload has decreased due to Coronavirus but I am struggling mentally and I can't get out of it. And before this so many things have gone wrong, it feels like everywhere I go people hate me and look down on me, I wouldn't even have the guts to reply to any ones posts as I would just think the person would think badly of me / what I say.

22 Replies 22

Obsessed
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi Keira2.

Its great you have reached out for help in this forum.It is the first step help you on your path of recovery.

My story is much the same, when I was going down the path of wanting and planing my departure from this world all I wanted to do is to get rid of the pain in my head. I though I was the only person who suffered, I though now one cared about me. I was scared to open up to people because I thought they would think I was weak.Yes there was a few people I opened up to had glazed eyes and when that happened I just stopped. However I know who my friends are because when I did open up they came around to my place to help me. I thought I had a lot of friends in reality I have five good friends that I can openly speak to.

In the time when I was in a big deep hole i would exersize a lot, do yoga a lot, meditate a lot every week I would do all these on different days. This allowed me to cope with my yin/yang in my head and to cope with bullies at work.

In 2016 when I hit rock bottom it was suggested for me to go to the GP to get medication. I rejected the idea because I thought it was a sign of weakness. I was a typical male. she'll be right I'll build a bridge and get over it.That never happened and for four years with depression and anxiety. three months about after 6 months of depression I finally decided to go to the GP for help.

ITS the best thing I did. My whole family has seen a big difference. They all say I am a lot happier now.

The medication will not cure the medication BUT what I have now found I can cope with difficult situations a lot better, Meaning my anxiety when confronted at work or if some one ask me a difficult question instead of breaking out in a sweat and shaking life a leaf in a hurricane I can keep myself under more control. I will be on my medication for as long as I can.

The point of all this don't be afraid for medication to help you and don't be afraid to ask a pychologis for help to get though this difficult time.

Look after yourself and continue to reach out for help.

Phil

sisu100
Community Member

Hi Keira2,

Thank you for continuing to reach out, I really appreciate that you are continuing to connect with us as I know it can be really hard to be so honest and open with your feelings in times like these. It's very brave and important that you have done so and I want you to know that we’re here to provide you with as much support as you need.

I’m so sorry to hear that work has still not been going well. It sounds like it’s gotten to a point where it’s become overwhelming and unbearable for you to even be at work. When experiencing such hopelessness, I imagine that even turning up for work must feel daunting or even impossible right now. I want to say that you are so strong and resilient to have put up with the conditions you are working in for as long as you have. Your job seems to have made you feel isolated and worthless and that’s so far from the truth- you are so much for than that and you deserve so much better. I’m wondering if there’s any possibility that you might be able to take some time off from work, even just for a short period, just to give yourself a bit of a break away from such a negative environment?

I can really hear your pain through your posts, and I’m so sorry that you’re going through such a difficult time right now. No one should have to face such dark moments alone. If you're struggling to hold on to hope, please remember that we are here for you. As you can see on this thread, many people here care about you and are here listen and help you through this. You can always talk about whatever's on your mind, and we'll be here to support you every step of the way. Please do check in whenever you’re up to it, we’d all love to hear from you.

Keira2
Community Member
Thank you Sophie, replying is helpful right now, appreciate it.

Keira2
Community Member
Thank you all for your replies, means a lot. I have been on a medication for many years now, but asked to try something new so have started on a new one about a week ago. Does anyone know if you can get a medical certificate for depression if it becomes absolutely necessary?

smallwolf
Community Champion
Community Champion

I cannot really answer your question myself - it would be something between you and your GP. Please have a look at the link(s) below. They might be helpful...

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/anxiety/medical-certificate-for-anxiety-

https://www.healthshare.com.au/questions/45040-what-can-i-do-if-i-need-time-off-because-of-my-depres...

sisu100
Community Member

Hi Keira2,

Just wanted to check in to see how you're going. How are you feeling today?

You mentioned that you are trying a new medication- how are you finding it so far?

I hope you found the links smallwolf shared to be helpful. Please do feel free to let us know how you're travelling whenever you feel up to it.

Pumba293
Community Member

Hey Keira2,

I wanted to check in as well to see how you're doing. How are you finding the new medication?

I also hope the links that smallwolf provided were helpful as well. I also wanted to say thank you for replying to my own thread, it meant a lot to me to hear from you. Take your time and let us know how things are going when you're feeling up to it. You're going to be just fine.

Kind regards,

Pumba

Keira2
Community Member

Hi Smallwolf, Sisu100 and Pumba293,

Thank you all very much for your replies, it really does mean a lot. And thank you Pumba293 for thanking me for replying to your post. I am very shy, it helps with the confidence.

Saturday I didn't do very much as not feeling that great. Then Sunday I pushed myself and got quite a few things done as I recently moved house, so that felt good at least I achieved something.

Today at work I did still have some bad feelings but it wasn't overwhelming and it wasn't like some other days where I wish I could just run out of the place and end things. So maybe the medication is hopefully starting to help.

Hope you are all well.

sisu100
Community Member

Hi Keira2,

It sounds like you had a very productive day on Sunday! Can't say the same about me, I think I spent a bit too much time on Netflix over the weekend! I think it's so amazing that you went and pushed yourself to get things done. I know how low you've been feeling lately, so I imagine that it must have been difficult. I think you deserve a big pat on the back for doing this and it honestly makes me so happy to hear that it's helped you feel good 🙂 How has the move been so far? I imagine there's a lot of things to organise and set up.

I'm so glad to hear that work hasn't been as overwhelming as previously, and I hope the bad feelings continue to improve. Are you finding it the same at work today?

Just also wanted to say, it warms my heart to see you and Pumba293 connecting and supporting each other in your threads 🙂

Keira2
Community Member

Thank you all so much for your replies, it really meant a lot. I thought the way I was feeling was due to the situation and nothing could stop me feeling like that, but when I take a high dose of the new medication, it really works and I feel so much better. I was really shocked by this. It's definitely worth trying out new medications and doses if your current one isn't helping that much. I wish I knew this sooner.

Thank you Sisu100 and Pumba for checking in on me. I do have quite a lot to sort out with the move and coronavirus will slow things down a bit, but the worst stuff is definitely over. It is my own house this time (bought my first house) so it's good to go slowly and not spend too much money at once. Thank you Pumba for your suggestion of the sticky notes in the jar. I am kind of doing a version of that by trying to make sure I do something enjoyable each day (usually food) and I will have to try to keep the work hours reasonable, which they are right now. I hope you are going ok with your situation, I will have a look for your thread.