Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

This space discusses suicide and self-harm. Consider limiting the time you spend here. To use the section safely, read the pinned discussion.

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Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 96

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

Stax Same old feelings
  • replies: 2

Hi All, Im a newbie here and thought that this maybe a good outlet. Lately i've been struggling with suicidal thoughts or self harm. Like right now i want to have some physical pain instead of numbness, hopelessness, being unfulfilled and all the oth... View more

Hi All, Im a newbie here and thought that this maybe a good outlet. Lately i've been struggling with suicidal thoughts or self harm. Like right now i want to have some physical pain instead of numbness, hopelessness, being unfulfilled and all the other negative feelings. Having some physical pain i know how to heal it or stop it from hurting, these other feelings i have no idea how to do it. However, i will not do it, because 1. i don't want to clean the mess when i come too. 2. I can't afford to pay for damages on the property. The upside of lazy i guess. I have seen a couple of psychologist and feel that the help they try and provide does not work from me - they have diagnosed me with a few mental illnesses (which is helpful). Also, been feeling to damaged too help. The struggle is to find the best one to work with, within a budget and timeframe. Also monthly visits calls builds up my anxiety and then too have it cancelled or postpone just makes me feel even more damaged more rejected. Asking for help makes me vulnerable and I vowed never to be in that position and then that happens... Frustration, anger and too damaged flooded in. Today was one of those days. So for now its the same old life, same old feelings. Thanks for the rant.

pleasehelpme1111 im desperate: i want to kill myself but i don't think anyone is treating it as an immediate reality
  • replies: 4

Yesterday I told my dad that I was suicidal, and having thoughts of suicide. I have been dealing with this since year 9 (in year 12 now) and it recently escalated (past two weeks) to the point that it was no longer passive, but I recently made a plan... View more

Yesterday I told my dad that I was suicidal, and having thoughts of suicide. I have been dealing with this since year 9 (in year 12 now) and it recently escalated (past two weeks) to the point that it was no longer passive, but I recently made a plan. He called the mental health triage people (we're in SA) and they sent out some people to evaluate me two hours later. The two that came (a social worker and a nurse) were pretty dismissive, and made it seem that because I was able to clearly express myself and I wasn't confused or something, and because I was purposefully not sleeping enough (to punish myself, might I add) I was less of a risk to myself, and that all I needed to do was sleep more and stay nourished. Which is bs (but they will be evaluating me properly by Monday with psychiatrists and stuff). Now I'm regretting telling anyone, because I'm not allowed to be home alone by myself, and my phone is taken before I go to bed. Along with my computer. I regret telling my parents because I suspect the most that will happen is that I will get a psychiatrist. But I don't want to exist in the immediate future. There's no way I'm going to a psychiatric hospital, even though I suspect its the only thing that will stop me from killing myself. My parents (my mum especially, my dad went to his rural job - locum, he's a general practitioner today) don't really seem to genuinely think that I'm this close | | to killing myself. I don't want to make an attempt just to get them to listen. Does anyone have any advice? Please help me. Thanks

Loser_les I can’t feel any lower
  • replies: 2

Hello I am really struggling with life lately, I have been to the doctors and been prescribed a couple different medications for depression I am on a high dose of medication at the moment and it was somewhat helping. my partner has decided that she i... View more

Hello I am really struggling with life lately, I have been to the doctors and been prescribed a couple different medications for depression I am on a high dose of medication at the moment and it was somewhat helping. my partner has decided that she is separating from me, we have an 11 year old son as well. she is still living in the house and has just shut me out of her life, I used to work away and wanted to be at home with my family which I love dearly but once I made that decision she told me it was over. I have never been so hurt it’s been nearly 3 months and I’m feeling so low she says she is working and stays out most of the night I know it is no longer my business but it is killing me inside. I struggle to sleep at night my mind just never stops tormenting me, the other night I had a severe migraine and tried to get ready for work then awoke in an ambulance they said I had been on the kitchen floor unconscious for sometime before I was found the hospital scanned and X-ray Ed the crap out of me, blood Test galore but found nothing I don’t know how to help myself out this hole I’m starting to think about suicidal things I cam just so alone and broken

ReachOut83 Unimportant
  • replies: 4

All the time I feel plagued by loneliness. Sometimes I feel as if I am the only lonely person out there. in my adolescence I was the odd one out, because I was big and tall and people just seemed to stay clear of me (not that I acted tough, and never... View more

All the time I feel plagued by loneliness. Sometimes I feel as if I am the only lonely person out there. in my adolescence I was the odd one out, because I was big and tall and people just seemed to stay clear of me (not that I acted tough, and never thought that I was). I was in a relationship in 2017-2019, where I was used and bled dry constantly. When I go to cafes, or restaurants by myself I look around and see groups, pairs, couples and families out together, and it makes me realise how unimportant I am. Even just one person to talk to weekly would be good. I enjoy walking, going out for coffee, cooking, and walking my dog. I have been referred to as a people pleaser. I don’t know? I just think that it is easier to be nice and accomodating, then selfish. I ask myself often whether it is worth being here anymore, or not? Sometimes I think how peaceful it would be to not be here. Just a thought.

Stacey92 No one cares, no one to tell
  • replies: 2

I’m so confused and don’t know how to feel, I thought at almost 30 I would have beaten this illness. I noticed feeling worse and worse over the last couple of weeks, finally got the courage up to tell my partner. He seemed understanding and I felt be... View more

I’m so confused and don’t know how to feel, I thought at almost 30 I would have beaten this illness. I noticed feeling worse and worse over the last couple of weeks, finally got the courage up to tell my partner. He seemed understanding and I felt better letting it out. we had a bad argument today and he mocked and made fun of me, and saying things like it’s all about me, and I’m sad all the time. Even called my family and ranted to them. I wish I could show them how I feel. I have never felt soo ashamed and more like disappearing. We fight soo badly, it gets so intense. I’m pregnant, and have 3 kids, I feel even more ashamed at these factors. I just wish I could make all the shit stuff go away!

blueeyes25 New and alone..
  • replies: 3

Hi.. I honestly have so much in my head right now that I just don't even know where to start. I know I'm scared to share more about myself in case this and my future threads are found or read by people I don't want them to read. I just know I need so... View more

Hi.. I honestly have so much in my head right now that I just don't even know where to start. I know I'm scared to share more about myself in case this and my future threads are found or read by people I don't want them to read. I just know I need somewhere to be able to go when I feel like I do right now. Completely alone and at the point where I have regrets and wished this life was different or it just wasn't even happening altogether. I am a mum to 4 children. Two of them have special needs. There is so much more I wish to express but I feel like deep down I already know the answer and I'm afraid to actually read it. I just know I'm tired of being a no one. Tired of being the ONLY one that does anything in this house, the one that does all the running around, the helping of everyone else, actually GIVES A DAMN and yet they are all still angry and spiteful. Everything I do is never enough. Like ever. Already suffer from depression and anxiety. I've wanted to increase my medication.. I don't want to feel anything anymore.. but psychologist wants to see if my current situation these last few months, changes and see if that helps how I feel. I am so done.

Guest_0784 About to loose another one, and can’t say goodbye. (BRIEFLY MENTIONS SUICIDE)
  • replies: 6

Hi everyone. I’ve just learnt a few minutes ago that I’m about to loose my Great Uncle who I call Uncle Moose. And the worst part is that even though I’ve lived only a 5 minute drive from him. And I’ve barely got to see him! And I can’t go into the h... View more

Hi everyone. I’ve just learnt a few minutes ago that I’m about to loose my Great Uncle who I call Uncle Moose. And the worst part is that even though I’ve lived only a 5 minute drive from him. And I’ve barely got to see him! And I can’t go into the hospital and say goodbye and have a decent conversation because of COVID restrictions. Or ring him on the telephone because now he is unable to talk. I’ve already talked before about my mental illness and disability here before. And already I was having problems trying to not kill myself. And I’m not quite sure I’ll be able to make it this time round. I was not aware that he was unwell until just now. But looking back, I can notice the signs already. He was giving me some items he loved, like information of the Queen Mary back in 1998. And the London to Sydney Air Race in 2001. And when I was having Afternoon Tea today, there were mentioning Uncle Moose in a solum way. If I knew he was sick, I would run down to his house to hang out with him. This is a repeat of what happened to my Grandad who I called Q, Uncle Moose's Brother. But we knew he was sick 9 years before he died. I don’t want any more of this! I am worried that this is only the beginning of the line. I’m worried I’m next. Then Marnie (my grandmother), Dora (my pet’s as therapy guide dog), and everyone else that I know and love. I feel like I’m coming apart for the 2nd time! I know we can’t change the past, but we can change the future. There is still enough time to go in and speak to him and spend time with him. But they won’t let me in to say goodbye. And that time is shortening extremely quickly. I need to go in and talk about everything. Because I know from my experience is, even if they can’t talk. If they’re obviously awake, like eyes open, eye contact, breathing. Well then they can still hear me. All I want to do from this evening onwards is to inside his room for the whole day and talk to him about all kinds of stuff that I would of talked about for all of these years that have gone. I really need help before it’s too late! Please!

Justalooser Why am I here
  • replies: 4

I tried to commit suicide three days ago ended up in hospital under watch. I thinking like that again now I need help

I tried to commit suicide three days ago ended up in hospital under watch. I thinking like that again now I need help

Kat_Kai1067 What do i do??? I broke my clean streak of 3 months. I don’t t know what to do. Pls help!!!
  • replies: 2

I broke my streak because something bad happened to me. It has left me empty and ashamed. I need help with 2 things. 1) my guy friend kissed me on the lips without my permission 2) I harmed myself again and none of the stratrgies i had in place are w... View more

I broke my streak because something bad happened to me. It has left me empty and ashamed. I need help with 2 things. 1) my guy friend kissed me on the lips without my permission 2) I harmed myself again and none of the stratrgies i had in place are working. Pls anyone help!!!!

hannalogy It's been a while
  • replies: 2

Hi, I first self harmed in highschool. My mum was on drugs and often acted in distressing ways that resulted in trauma for me. It grew in intensity till I was about 19 when I managed to find help and a way out. I was at least able to stop injuring my... View more

Hi, I first self harmed in highschool. My mum was on drugs and often acted in distressing ways that resulted in trauma for me. It grew in intensity till I was about 19 when I managed to find help and a way out. I was at least able to stop injuring myself badly. It's flared up once or twice since (I'm now 33) but not as bad as I no longer drink to excess (it was the combination of drinking and self-harm that really got me into trouble). Anyway.. Its been more difficult for me lately. I'm going through a rough patch. Its difficult (but probably good) because I have small children.. I'm basically never alone and things that leave lasting marks are not an option for me. I'm already wondering how I will explain my scars to them when they eventually ask. I think that is helping me not be too stupid. But in the moments when my emotions are so intense I can't cope I take myself quietly away and do something that hurts but will fade. Anyway.. I tried to bring it up with my counselor but she didn't engage with it at all. It was in the context of something else we were discussing and she just let it go by. Id actually worked up a lot of nerve to tell her about it and when she didn't really respond to it at all I felt terrible. Like I must just be seeking attention in her eyes or.. whatever. I don't understand why. Is what I'm doing not counting?? I don't know what I had hoped for, I think I just wanted to talk about it, to not have it as this hidden thing I was doing. I didn't want her to make a huge deal about it, but I wanted to talk about it.