Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

Pinned discussions

Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section

replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

Sorted by:

Start a discussion

Depression Sucks

replies: 4

Hi guys, This is my first post on here so I don't even know if anyone will come across my post. I am 23 year old single mum with a daughter who is 5 years old. I recently got Diagnosed with Depression back in 2020. Ive been taking medication for it since then and I feel my depression can be good for months & other times it is so bad that I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like I cannot talk to my family and friends as I am a huge overthinker as well and I feel like if I am to tell them I am falling back into my dark place that they will think 'here we go again'. I have put them through hell the past two years and I don't want to worry them anymore than I have. I live in a small town and the two friends I have live 8 hours away from me & I feel that sometimes they just don't take my depression seriously or care as much as I wish they would. I would post that I'm feeling upset and they will see it and not even swipe to see if I'm okay, I know people have their own lives but I feel like sometimes I just have no-one to go to. Hence why I am posting on a page, I feel like I am more comfortable speaking to strangers about my depression then the people I know personally. I am currently 3 months clean from self harm but I still have the urge to go back and hurt myself again. I do not want to tell my family & friends as I feel like half of them look at me like I'm attention seeking. I just wanted to post on here to see if anyone else is feeling the same way as me and if anyone has any advice on what to do when feeling like depression is taking over your life again.

Life is for winners

replies: 4

Sometimes it appears success comes easy. Other times you are sinking, watching the sharks circle. 30 years of uninterrupted water wearing away at the hull tends to beat you up slowly and surely until there's nothing left in the tank. The only thing that improves with age is the clarity to which you watch. It never gets easier, only increasingly more obvious to where the ship is heading. Holding on for the sake of family means over time that same family become objects of blame. "If not for you this would be over". "If not for you I would be free". It's unfair, but it's where the mind altered by depression and neglect takes you. I don't know why I've reached out here, but it seems significant. I'm fatigued, and it embarrasses and angers me to find me so weak, but it is no surprise. live your life and be happy if you have even a small part of your mind that still finds hope or joy or love... or SOMETHING. It is a blessing and it hurts when it is gone.

what to do if person who saved your life no longer talks to you?

replies: 7

Hello, roughly a year ago I attempted to take my own life, I was stopped only by a phone call from my best friend after I sent what I thought would be my last message. He literally saved my life and made me feel like I was supposed to be alive and that at least someone wanted me to stay. However after he went to uni, he hasn't contacted me much as he has been busy. recently I have had similar thoughts of hurting myself, and some very distressing thoughts about how if the person who told me I should be alive no longer talks to me, should I not be alive? it is very distressing and I'm not sure how to deal with it, currently, I am safe though I have had to use my safety plan a few times, however, these thoughts won't go away. I feel forgotten and unwanted, I don't know what to do. Another friend who supports me a lot is about to leave for uni too and I just feel alone and helpless without them. I am autistic so I don't make friends easily, they are the only two people I have ever felt cared about me and that I feel close to. I'm frightened of what may happen when they leave, they are the only two people in my safety plan I can talk to if I'm worried I may hurt myself... I want to talk to them about how I feel however I get worried about talking to them as I fumble my words and sometimes go mute when I get upset, I'm worried they won't understand what I'm trying to tell them and I don't want to bother them with such issues when they are both busy and doing exams. I just do not want to be forgotten about because I know what I might do to myself and it frightens me. Any advice would be appriciated

Relapsing after 5 years..

replies: 2

Dealing with so much right now, covid has separated me from my support system and for the first time in 5 years I've considered self harm... I just can't stand this feeling of being so alone even tho I live with my partner... I have alot to be greatful for but these feelings of overwhelming sadness and anger are becoming to much.. my normal coping skills are failing me.. I just don't know what to do anymore..

Last Resort Harm

replies: 2

I hoped to not return to these forums. But I do believe I'm facing a serious problem that I wish to receive advice on. The nature of this post isn't positive in any means and may leave you feeling disturbed. I don't wish that upon anyone accidentally reading an excerpt while scrolling, so here's a warning that this post will contain thoughts and intent of self-harm, anxiety and depression and in general, me being paranoid as usual. I'm facing the possibility that I'm returning to self-harm as coping mechanism. I'll admit it, I haven't been clean for very long, being almost 2 weeks without acting upon my malicious thoughts. I self harm to stop myself from crying, to not make a fool of myself, to not panic, to not eat weird in public, to not to anything that draws attention. These first couple of weeks back at school have been an uppercut to my face. I've chosen my subjects for next year and started a new study regime in order to keep my place in english extension. I had to have a meeting with my math teacher due to the bold D-grade screaming in my face on my report card. Neither of these events had negative results, both were relatively neutral. But I felt a pounding ache in my throat and chest whenever the future was mentioned. The future where I'll be in ATAR working as hard as I could so I could go to university. But what if I'm not good enough, like I am now. What if even with my best efforts, with countless sleepless nights, overcoming my laziness and procrastination for my exams, it's still not acceptable. Something happened only yesterday that shocked me. Another one my friends, is grappling with suicidal thoughts. What. What do you mean I might have to report what she says? What do you mean she might do something she'll regret? I've dealt with these sorts of thoughts before, but now I'm not on the receiving end. What am I supposed to do? She doesn't really want to die, does she? I don't want to draw attention to myself, this isn't about me, but my urges are getting worse. I was on the verge of tears for an hour after I first heard about the situation. I sincerely hope that she's doing alright.

Tonight my toddler unknowingly saved my life!

replies: 4

I have been really struggling with self harm and suicidal thoughts for the past few months. When I was younger my stepfather committed suicide, because of this I know the devastation and heartache friends and family feel. I don't want my friends and family to ever have to feel that way because of me and because of that I have been very open with my husband whenever I felt like I wanted to take my life. Tonight was different, I didn't want to tell my husband, I didn't want anyone to stop me. Long story short I couldn't handle living like this anymore, I knew my family would be hurt but in time they would be ok. My daughter gave me a big cuddle and asked me if I was ok as she rubbed my back. I couldn't get words out. She then told me she will get me food to make me better. I hate that she seem me like that but I am also so thankful. She saved me! She reminded me of my reason to live!

How do I help her?

replies: 2

My sister has been suffering severe depression and been in therapy/medicated for 17 years. She has attempted suicide more than once. Both of us suffer PTSD from very brutal violent and mental abusive childhood. She has survival guilt for having it 'less' violent and mental abuse than me. She asked me yesterday if I'd be angry with her if she was able to get euthanised. As much as it broke my heart I answered honestly that I'm pro euthanasia for intolerable suffering. Mental illness is as real as any other you can see on a scan. Of course I don't want her to do that - I want her to live. But she's only getting sicker and live only for her family and friends. I looked into it and she can't get euthanasia because of where she lives, Belgium and Holland require you to be a citizen and Switzerland is too expensive. I worry that once she realises that, it'll make her feel even worse. Then this morning she messaged (we live in on opposite side of earth) and asked: What do you think would be the big difference between receiving active euthanasia and ending your life yourself? Except with approved active euthanasia relatives could could possibly be present and that they get a chance to ay goodby. Why do I say to that? It sound like she’s looking for my ‘permission’ to end it. She doesn't dare to bring it up with her friends out of fear that they will have her committed. I'm really worried, more than usual. Please help.

Am I just faking?

replies: 3

Hi, so this my first time asking for help in a while...I don't know if what I write will be triggering or not but I'll try my best to make sure its not. I had been three years clean...I don't really remember how long its been. That was the first time it happened, but I started again a few day ago...how do I know if I actually need help or if I'm just doing this because I'm bored... I feel like I'm faking this because it'll happen but then I'm fine the rest of the day and I can't really explain this to my parents cause they're foreign to this stuff and don't understand. and lockdown isn't making things any better. its not like I want to do it but I would be sitting and next thing you know I am on autopilot and it just happens...idk

SH and other tings ✨

replies: 6

Hello, I've been thinking about self harm since I was 12. I always thought of it as really gross and scary. But I'm 14 now and soon turning 15, it's been two weeks and I've done it nearly every day. It started when I was having a really bad mental breakdown and decided to do it. Something comforts me about it, I'm not entirely sure why I do it. The first time I did when I was crying like mad, I felt sick to my stomach and wanted to stop and I did. ALSO, I don't know if I'm doing it for attention. But I also think I'm doing it for a cry of help. BC I dont like talking about things, especially my opinions and feelings. Its starting to get bad again. I wanna see someone (psychologist or sum) but sometimes this feeling of sadness is comforting in a way. I don't even know anymore I just don't wanna feel like a burden when I'm sad around people.

I WOULD DIE, IF THING's were different, I am In HELL

replies: 0

I am 26 Year's Old, I am a IN JUSTICE I have been Mis Diagnosed with Psychosis at 18, but also far worse Schizophrenia at 19, I was than placed on compulsory med's at 21, and than at Just 22 I contracted Pre Diabetes Type-2, and than at 25 I had my Gallbladder Removed, I have been asking my Mother and Parent's for Year's to take me for a Second Medical Review, at the Mental Health Tribunal, and they haven't considered helping me, I have NO understanding how to do It, My Parent's are narcissistic and continuously gas light my Intelligence, and threaten to call the police to take me to a mental ward, and to take my medication, They don't care about my FUTURE at all, My Father Is a lot to list and Is SELFISH, and mentally abusive In many way's, and my mother takes responsibility, and than make's It seem Justified, Than If I try to make responsible Independent change's, She get's protective or sensitive like It's threatening or anxiety I have had a In ability to get my driver's licence, I had to wait 11 month's to get my learner permit form eligibility rather than 3 month's due to the mis diagnosis, I also have had up to 6 Instructor's, The first 3 were useless after the first lesson, The 4th randomly Informed me She was going to QUIT after 2 Lesson's, when thing's were going well, because I sent a message about my problem's, mistakenly to Her Instead to my mother, She expressed concern, A few days before She canceled I try'd telling Her that It's nothing to worry about, It was only a natural MISTAKE, The other 5th & 6th were not the most reliable, and one of those was very un professional, the 7th was fantastic for a sufficient amount of time, until we quit agreeably, because He became very arrogant and accusative, the one I have now I have now had four lesson's with Him, His the 8th Instructor so far and His going good at the moment, I had a Occupational Therapist O.T. and had to change Her because She undermined my duration of my length of driving beyond those Interval change's of Instructor's, so I had to find another one, Plus all these covid 19 corona virus lock down and extension's, I have to have now a second O.T. Off Road assessment needed and also a On Road O.T. assessment, medical review's, not Just 1 but as now 2 per year, between my GP, and Psychiatrist, and since changing the O.T., It's always hard to find experienced Instructor's, and In the region with O.T. correlation capability

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section replies: 0

Depression Sucks replies: 4

Life is for winners replies: 4

what to do if person who saved your life no longer talks to you? replies: 7

Relapsing after 5 years.. replies: 2

Last Resort Harm replies: 2

Tonight my toddler unknowingly saved my life! replies: 4

How do I help her? replies: 2

Am I just faking? replies: 3

SH and other tings ✨ replies: 6

I WOULD DIE, IF THING's were different, I am In HELL replies: 0