We are all human and need time out for self care

[MsPurple]

As a community champion I love coming on the forums and chatting to everyone on the forums. However recently the black dog decided to stick it's head back in and was a bit more persistent than most. I had to take some time away from the forums for self care. I used to not want to overshare on the forums, because I want to be a strong community champion. But I have learnt that most people value that we are going through the same things you are and just like you we are human and need time out for ourselves. Being strong doesn't mean the black dog doesn't come, it's by putting our hand up and saying, I need to take time out, increase self care and follow what my therapist says. I want to thank everyone for their support while I had some time away from the forums.

So my question to you is. What do you do when you take time out for self care?

I tend to watch movies, take a warm bath and meditate before bed to help me sleep.

Glad to be back and thanks in advance and I'm so glad to be part of a supportive community 🙂

MsP

[White_Rose]

Dear MsP

Great to see you back. I have to put my hand up also to being strong and not sharing everything. But you it right as I have discovered. No use in keeping all our problems tucked away from the daylight. It is those difficulties that give us the empathy and compassion for others.

Mary

[MsPurple]

Hi Mary

Yeah I like to share, but not necessarily overshare. I think on the forums I try be a rock, but sometimes we need a break from being the rock and just need some support or time out. So I had some time out. Plus work has been busy and I have been working 7 days on with a day off. We have more staff now so that is over thank goodness

[quirkywords]

Ms Purple,

Welcome back. I think we need to show that we are all human and have weaknesses and strengths.

I think the first step is acknowledging it is time for self care and give ourselves space .

Sometimes we know we need it but we keep saying I will take time offf when...

Self care is not a luxury or an indulgence it is a necessity.

Thanks for starting this thread. It is great to see your name back on the threads.

Quirky

[Lici]

Hi MrsP,

I just wanted to say that I love this "Being strong doesn't mean the black dog doesn't come, it's by putting our hand up and saying, I need to take time out, increase self care and follow what my therapist says" it took me so long in my life to realise that!

To answer your question, if I'm feeling down etc but still have energy I'll take my camera out to a conservation park and take photos of birds. I find taking photos of fairy-wrens always puts a smile on my face, they're so tiny and so full of life.

If I'm feeling less energetic I'll go to my bookshelves and pick out a series to start reading again. I love young adult fiction (even though I'm far from being a young adult!). I find escaping into a fantasy world full of supernatural beings relaxing and a great way to take my mind off things for a while.

I'm new here so I haven't seen you around yet, but I'm glad you're back and hopefully I'll see you around more 🙂

Kind regards,

Lici

[MsPurple]

HI Everyone. Thanks for the support

Lici going out in nature and taking photos sounds like an awesome idea. I just got a new phone with an awesome camera so it is something I should do when I need some time off. I have also read Harry Potter a few times. I love going to that imaginary place. I should find another book series to read. I have read hunger games as well (need to finish divergent series) haha if you have anything to suggest please share.

I'm lucky. I have a supportive family so they are good when I put my hand up. My family get it so I am lucky. I wish everyone had the support I do.

I like to sometimes go for a drive if stress. Usually to somewhere with coffee.

Hope to see you guys on here more regularly. Hopefully the black dog continues to behave. It is still around but not as bad as it has been

[Lici]

Hi MsP,

Uh oh! Asking me about book series is dangerous! I have three bookshelves full of books and then more in a bookshelf that's in my bed frame haha! One I did really enjoy though is the mortal instrument series by Cassandra Clare. There's 6 books in the main series, then there's a prequel series that has 3 books, a series set after the events of the main one with 3 books. There's also another few collaborations that she's done based on characters from the main series as well. I just looked at Cassandra's website and found out there's more! I'm a little bit excited now! The world has everything, angels, demons, nephalim, werewolves, vampires, warlocks. All set in teen angst and first love etc. It's one of my favourites to escape to!

I haven't read Harry potter myself but want to buy the books one of these days! I have read the hunger games and the divergent series. I love dystopians as well!

I better stop now before there's a huge wall of text!

[Quercus]

Hi MsP and everyone joining in or reading 😊

Agree with Quirky...Self care IS a necessity. A child health nurse told me recently she tells every new mum (although it applies to everyone) that they require a daily "hour of power". Every single day! One hour to do something for you. Time out from the world.

I also read a blog about how the words self care have been adopted by the media and the meaning butchered to make money.

He wrote that self care doesn't mean doing something fancy so you can post it on social media and impress others. He also wrote that the best kind of self care is not always worth photographing 😊. This struck a chord with me. My self care is gardening. It is for nobody but me. And sometimes it is as simple and unglamorous as digging a hole. Smashing rock with a pick. Sweat and aching muscle.

That said young adult fiction is also excellent self care. Getting lost in a book. If I am not in a Harry mood... My go to is Patricia Briggs. And I'll admit I do own the Twilight saga. The shame 😂😂. Easy reading and toned down violence. That appeals to me.

[White_Rose]

Great to read the posts as they piling in. Great thread MsPurple.

How come no one has mentioned The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings? For the younger set and those who are young at heart there is the C S Lewis series The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe. For more sci-fi have you read the Anne McCaffrey dragon series? I wonder why they have not been made into a film. All good fantasy books.

I have to admit I need some self care at the moment. I am a bit of a worry wart so making decisions about big things in my life can be be fraught with options not to mention wanting one thing and feeling that another is the best way. Oh how we love to complicate our lives. So my go to distractions ATM are stitching, scrapbooking, meditation and music. The picture of wolves in my avatar is a sample of my cross stitching. It's very much a favourite of mine.

Nat what are you talking about. I still read The Famous Five when I want something that does not tax my brain. I also enjoy Agatha Christie. I agree with your comment that self care does not need to be 'out there'. Gardening is good also.

Having a supportive family is fantastic. So many people with a MI cannot even talk about their problem with family because they are then labelled attention seeking or drama queen or some other derogatory label. I have two daughter who help when I need it.

Quirky I love your words. I think the first step is acknowledging it is time for self care and give ourselves space .
Sometimes we know we need it but we keep saying I will take time off when... Self care is not a luxury or an indulgence it is a necessity. The real problem with giving ourselves some care is by the time we need some serious care we have forgotten how and what to do. This is why Nat's suggestion of "an hour of power" Looking after ourselves and making it a part of our routine is essential to prevent or at least reducing the bad bits in our lives. When it becomes as normal as brushing your teeth I think we are putting ourselves in a good way to help ourselves.

Mary

[MsPurple]

HI everyone

I didn't mention Lord of the Rings because I have never read it. I read the first few pages and it was a difficult read so didn't go through with reading it. I should read the Cassandra Clare books. Something different. Maybe it will help with self care other than watching too many youtube videos.

I am glad I took some time off, however I did miss coming on here and helping others out. But I would read a post 5 times and nothing was sinking in. My mind was elsewhere. So I decide o take some time out

I am also obsessed with baths at the moment. Especially now that it is getting a bit colder. I am am looking at some oils to put in the bath to have some aroma therapy as well as a relaxing bath. I feel like espon salts don't do too much and are expensive.

Mary I am so glad I have a supportive family, and room mate. He understands mental health as well because he has depression. We mutually support each other.

I am still struggling a little with concentration, however it is coming back in bits.