So, how was your day?

[Doolhof]

I've had a busy kind of day that went very well. I have managed to work, go for a swim, had lunch in a park, enjoyed a coffee and biscuits with a client and looked at the second hand tent we have just bought ourselves.

I went down to the chook house to check on my "ladies" and had a chat with them while they clucked away waiting for me to feed them. I also had a look to see where we can set the tent up in the garden this weekend to try it out. I'm already thinking of places nearby where we can go camping. I will also ask my sister and nieces if they would like to join me sometime.

Please feel free to contribute and share how you have spent your day.

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools

[Doolhof]

Hi All,

I had a busy and enjoyable day yesterday. I needed to have a blood test done. The lady in the clinic suggested I pop my hand bag and coat on the bed and sit in the chair, I told her I would pop my things in the chair and myself on the bed! Ha. Ha. I am feeling a little faint just thinking about the blood test!

I had packed my breakfast, drove to park and ate it there listening to the birds. I had time for a short walk then went to assist my first client. That all went well and she was very happy to see me.

Had my lunch in a different park and read a little bit of a book about exercises. I hope to actually try the exercises sometime and not just read about them!

I started to develop a headache and hoped it didn't turn into a migraine so took some headache pills. I went to the pool as I had intended, thinking a swim might help relieve some of the tension in my back and neck.

The pool was full of kids learning to swim. The noise was amazing. A girl of about 7 or 8 had a chat with me for a while which was so sweet. I stayed for a while and the headache increased so I took a migraine tablet and went to my next client.

I'd helped her clean her curtains last week and she was still singing my praises! The dear thing. I felt so pleased she was happy with the result. She had even been outside to see what her curtains looked like from the street!

I guess that is a little like the satisfaction you feel Anne when you have been able to help someone. Especially with the food hampers. They must make a huge difference to people.

Came home and took more medication to try to get rid of my jolly headache. We had planned to go out for dinner as we had a voucher to use for a hotel.

The meal was delicious. I thoroughly enjoyed the sweet potato chips. If you haven't tried them, then do so. We are going to cook some here at home.

When I had first woke up yesterday morning I didn't want to get out of bed! Look at all the happenings I would have missed out on if I had slept all day!

I'm hoping to have more time on the computer later tonight. Time to dash off for another day of happenings!

Cheers to you all from Lauren

[Hopefullseeking]

Hi Lauren

Sounds wonderful having your breakfast and lunch in a park, would be wonderful with the sound of the birds etc.  My friend and I when we go to the beach always take our lunch and eat it with the sound of the ocean behind us, bliss. Oh I forgot, with the sound of seagulls too. Ha, ha.

Not good about the headaches, I don't get migraines thank goodness. I hope you mentioned them to your doctor.  Sorry a bit of a mother hen at times,

Doesn't it warm your heart to have someone appreciate your hard work, I wish all your clients were like her.  I do get appreciated at my volunteer job which is heart warming especially when you know it is genuine.

I have friends that swear by sweet potato chips, should try them some time.

I saw my psychologist this morning, another incredibly emotional session.  I asked her if she thought the depression would ever go, she felt at the moment it is overwhelming me, she said most likely it would get better but not go away completely. It is something I have to be mindful of, very disappointing.

Then I went to Sizzlers for lunch to help celebrate a friends 80 th birthday, I really gave it my all and tried to enjoy myself but I failed.  Others wouldn't have guessed that I was struggling except two people who know me well, they guessed.

Obviously now I am home and my cat is demanding my attention.

Better be off.  You take care.

Anne

[Doolhof]

Hi Anne,

Yes it is a very nice consolation when people say thank you for something you have done for them. I don't expect it all of the time, but it is heart warming when it happens as I am sure you can relate to.

Sometimes dealing with issues can be very difficult. I feel I need to let go of the pain in order to be able to heal. Too much hurt isn't all that good. I hope you can find a balance and the difficulties will soon change to a more settled state of feelings.

Regarding my migraines, yes my Dr. knows about them. I was in hospital last year for three days hooked up to a drip due to migraines! I try to knock the headaches down before they turn into migraines. It is a bit difficult with my line of work to just leave my clients and go home.

I only had a half day of work today so I caught up with a friend for lunch. A bit like you struggling to enjoy yourself at Sizzlers, I was struggling a little to really feel engaged with my friend. I still enjoyed myself though.

Tomorrow I will be a little bit busier and in the evening have my Country Fire Service Training so will see what we get up to. This evening it has been bucketing down with rain, so if it is like that tomorrow, we will probably have some kind of inside training.

Hope you have a good day Anne.

Cheerio for now from Lauren

[Indra]

Hi Lauren - at times it is difficult to get out as my 15 year old is a runner. We tried getting him out and about today - pupil free day and his brother was at kindy. Didn't go all that well - didn't help when my partner  got a CFS call out half way through the outing. Most people aren't interested in catching up - I have tried, but either get stood up or people are hesitant because of my son. When I feel up to it there is a my time group I attend, but generally don't discuss much about myself and I don't always feel comfortable there. I am in SA as well in a regional centre , I moved to be closer to my son's school. This has been a great help already - knowing someone is listening. I  do apologize if I come across needy - but it feels like grabbing a hand that is saving you from drowning. I enjoy reading about your day - get to live vicariously through others lol Anyway small steps forward - one day hopefully can feel myself again. Enjoy the rest of the evening

[Hopefullseeking]

Hi Lauren

A balance yes, I have been working incredibly hard with my psychologist to do exactly this, we are working on a form of Exposure Therapy to do with my brother, it is working but slowly and it isn't easy.

I just discovered today that I have Vertigo, I looked it up on the net, I just thought I had stress related dizziness.  Don't need more complications but I do feel slightly better knowing exactly what it is.

It is hard when you catch up with friends but don't feel completely there and engaged with their company, happens a lot with me.  I do socialise a lot as I know it is good therapy so I do my best, some days I really enjoy myself, others I would rather be home in bed.

Hope you enjoyed your Country Fire Service Training, sounds like fun.

Its really windy here at the moment, hoping it settles tomorrow as I wanted to do some gardening.  I brought sugar can mulch to put on the garden but in this wind it would all blow away.

July and I are getting along really well, we have so much in common.  Thank you for putting me in touch with her. 

Have a good weekend, hope you do something special.  I am making some more cards.

Until next time

Cheers

Anne

[Doolhof]

Hi Indra,

I have been quite busy lately with lots of stuff. Some of it has been CFS related regarding an unpleasant incident. I'm sure your partner can relate to that.

Thankfully my husband has been very supportive over the weekend as he isn't generally! Ha. Ha.

Sorry to read that your older son runs away. I don't know how it would be to have those issues.

I'm not making light of your situation at all, but I have a funny story about a child running away from me. I used to work in After Hours School Care and at the time my back was really sore. One girl ran out the door and I was told to run after her.

I couldn't run very fast at all, so I called out to her and asked her to please stop because I was a really old lady and was about to have a heart attack. She stopped and we both had a good laugh. We had a slow walk back to the centre and a good chat as well.

By the way, you don't come across as needy at all. I am pleased I am able to make a small difference and hope your feelings of self esteem, self worth and your confidence pick up.

About 20 years ago now, I suffered a back injury which required an operation. I spent about a year living on the floor as I couldn't get in and out of a bed. During that time a friend went on a world tour, so I had my husband borrow a lot of travel books from the library. I had my own world tour through books.

Hopefully you will be able to discover something you are passionate about and work on it to help you feel better about where you are at right now.

I'm sending you a cyber hug full of care, from Lauren

[Doolhof]

Hi Anne,

I would like to congratulate and encourage you to continue with your sessions regarding your brother. I will not say that I understand how tough it is, as I have no idea what you are still going through.

Hopefully your vertigo will pass. I had that quite badly last year along with a 4 day migraine. Not much fun at all.

I'm so pleased you and July have connected. It must help to be able to chat with each other as you comprehend what each other have and will continue to experience.

The County Fire Service Training can be very interesting. I sometimes have trouble remembering things as my mind is easily muddled, but the trainers have a lot of patience with me! We have just as many females as men in our Brigade.

Some of the incidents can be rather horrific though. So far I haven't witnessed anything too gross first hand. Our brigade deals with a lot of road accidents as well.

One the weekend I caught up with my older niece, then my younger niece and my sister and brother in law. It was a lovely day. Sunday we had visitors and then we went for a walk along a trail we have only recently discovered. I knew about it for a couple of years, just hadn't managed to find the time to get there. The track is only a few kilometres from our town and goes through farm land and a small gorge.

I'm hoping to spend some time with the chooks outside tomorrow after work if all goes well.

Cheerio for now, from Lauren

[Indra]

Hi Lauren,

My fiancée has been to one nasty car accident so far with CFS, he joined last November - he enjoys it immensely and has been very dedicated and I support as much as I can. Even if it is just having the keys in the right place! That's a nice change that your hubby was supportive over the weekend - take it and run with it I say ☺ It is highly stressful having a son who is a runner and he is very much the opportunistic escapee as well. I have had the police involved twice since I have moved here. I did like your story - it made me smile - and I am glad she stopped lol Oh and no making light or seeing the funnier side of things is a good coping mechanism. 

I was sorry to hear of your back operation - the pain and frustration of not being able to move properly, escapism into books is something I have done since I was a child. I have had a long and dark life, another story for another day though. A positive was last year I got to meet my favourite author Kate Forsyth at Supernova and had a chat and got my favourite book of hers signed. A really lovely and friendly person. 

A big hug back to you Lauren and thank you for caring xx 

[Doolhof]

Hi Indra,

When you son makes a run for it, does he go to any particular place, or does he just take off and go where ever? It is a good thing the police have been involved already as they will now know your situation and your son if you need help in the future.

Another story about someone escaping. I heard of an older lady with dementia who used to wander away from home in a small town. People knew her and would take her to the police station until a family member could pick her up. In the end, she went straight to the police station herself as they always gave her a cup of tea!

Congratulations on meeting your favourite author. That must have been a wonderful experience for you!

I'm trying to write a book about my experiences around loosing our babies. I am about half way done but just don't seem to find the time to get back to it! One day I will.

One day you may want to share more about your life, and if you do, this is a safe place to do so. No one knows who the other person is, people here care for each other and want to help. Just knowing there is someone the other side of the screen who is willing to "listen" is half the battle sometimes.

Wishing you a good day!

Cheers for now from Lauren

[Indra]

Hi Lauren,

Thanks for the positive thoughts - I  did actually have a bit better day. I had my regular check with my GP today - it's primarily for my blood level check (I am a lifer on bloodthinners ), but we also discuss how I am coping with my depression. He is still pushing for meds - I am hesitant about doing this - so for now just working on other strategies. 

As for my older son - we have narrowed down 3 spots that he will head too - it's also thanks to us watching him plan his "trips" on Google lol I have to laugh at some of the more stressful things at times otherwise I would reach breaking point much faster. Country is sometimes a little safer in that respect people will help out - this was the case in the town we lived in before.

l was so pleased to hear that you are writing about your experiences - not a happy one but I hope you find some solace or some sort of therapeutic feeling from this. You are a strong person Lauren.

My life has been a struggle all along and I had been thinking about a few things today. I grew up in a violent household where I witnessed my brother being beaten due to ny father's jealousy through drinking. My brother was from my mum's 1st marriage. My brother's father died in a car accident 3 days after he was born. When my brother moved out of home I bore the brunt of being hit to a lesser extent - my younger sister never went through any of it. My brother and I  are closer and have a bond and understanding of this. However he doesn't know and neither do many that I was also sexually abused starting at age 11 by a family friend. I have never really gad the courage to speak about this much and usually don't want to remember either. Last year I finally had it out with my mother about this. I had tried telling her when I was younger but she didn't believe me or more to the point didn't want to know. I wasn't angry as such - just wanted to know as a mother why she didn't protect myself or my brother. I guess she couldn't handle what I had confronted her with and changed the conversation to be being about herself. Not really the ideal childhood and I think the only way I  got through was keeping busy and my best friend when I was younger, not that I told her much but I think she knew, tried to have me stay at her house as much as she could. Sadly we drifted apart as we got older. 

Wow, I didn't realise I had said so much and this is just a start......

Thank you for listening and for being a friend 

Indra