So, how was your day?

[Doolhof]

I've had a busy kind of day that went very well. I have managed to work, go for a swim, had lunch in a park, enjoyed a coffee and biscuits with a client and looked at the second hand tent we have just bought ourselves.

I went down to the chook house to check on my "ladies" and had a chat with them while they clucked away waiting for me to feed them. I also had a look to see where we can set the tent up in the garden this weekend to try it out. I'm already thinking of places nearby where we can go camping. I will also ask my sister and nieces if they would like to join me sometime.

Please feel free to contribute and share how you have spent your day.

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools

[Doolhof]

Hi Anne,

I am not sure if you want to "chat" about your son being in jail or not, but if you do I will certainly be here for you.

There has also recently been a lady who goes by July who has a son in jail at present. Her thread is under "Grief, loss and separation" and her thread is called "Sadness, grief and regret over a son's incarceration."

July sounds like another lovely lady, you might like to contact her.

If I am sticking my nose in where it is not wanted, just let me know.

Hope you are feeling okay today and the family visiting on the weekend went okay.

Best wishes to you for a happy and contented week, one I am looking forward to myself!

Cheers, from Lauren

[Hopefullseeking]

Hi Lauren

Glad to hear you went for an enjoyable walk, I do enjoy the countryside but don't get out much.

I did go to my oldest son Michael's place for dinner, he cooked veggies I took a chicken.  I didn't get a card or anything else so you could say I got cooked veggies for mothers day. I haven't heard at all from my youngest son Peter. 

I thought I had mentioned where he was, never mind the cat is out of the bag now.  I was expecting a card from Peter so have been quite devastated to not get anything.  I can't ring him in jail but he can ring me, but hasn't. I find him and his problems hard to take in fact it has contributed greatly to this bout of depression. I try to put him in a box and detach but at times like now it is my undoing and for some unknown reason I am having really bad vibes about him.  This is the second time he has been to jail and I don't know what for or for how long. 

I am definitely going to track down July's post and read through them then tell her my story, it might help the both of us.  You are not sticking your nose in it, I am grateful that you thought of her as it is very difficult to explain how you feel to people that have not been in your shoes.

Mum and I drove around a lot on Saturday, she gave up her car when she had a stroke and now is regretting it as she has trouble getting around.  I however am not because she doesn't have the strength she use to in her right side so driving could be an issue and so could her safety.

I feel I am in for a bit of a rough week this week and I know you can relate to why.  Besides mothers day it is Peter's birthday next month, I will send him a card but may not get a reply.  Its very painful but most of the time I manage to cope.

I am off to find July and have a chat with her, thanks once again for telling me.

Have a wonderful week.

Hugs

Anne

[Doolhof]

Hi Anne,

Thanks for letting me know I have not been too forward with suggesting you get in touch with July. I hope you have connected.

There was another thread a while ago from a guy who had actually recently been released from prison, but I don't think he posted for long.

A couple of the male " Community Champions" here at Beyond Blue have been one a police officer and the other a prison officer. I think you may find comments from both of them on July's thread as well.

I really do have no idea how you must be feeling. I will encourage you to send Peter a card though. That may make you feel better anyway.

There is a guy whom my husband likes to spend time with and I really don't like him at all. Anyway, when we are invited to their place or here, I try to make the most of the evening. If I think about how much I dislike the guy I ruin the evening for myself and probably for his family and my husband as well.

I'm glad you had a nice day with your Mum. Sometimes I think I should make an effort to visit my Mum but I make it seem too difficult. I need to travel for about 5 to 6 hours to get there including a boat ride.

Hopefully your week won't be as bad as you think it might be. Try to schedule some nice little interludes in-between so you have something to look forward to.

Cheers for now from Lauren

[Hopefullseeking]

Hi Lauren

I did find Julys post and left a long message explaining my sons circumstances and thought I would have heard back but have not.  Hope I didn't scare her off.

I read her thread and did see who replied to her.  A bit confused as to why she has not responded, may be she is not here very often.

Must be hard for you to go and socialise with someone you don't like, can't imagine it, I would probably not go but I do suffer from anxiety.

I discussed at length my son and his lack of contact and how I am feeling, with my psychiatrist yesterday and was extremely emotional and have since fallen in a heap but I am at my volunteer job today so can't show it.  Consequently I have been nibbling all day just to help with the emotions in check. I enjoy doing the work I do but at times my head isn't there.

I do card making so haven't much on this weekend so will be making a few cards, it helps.  I have to concentrate on what I am doing so card making is distracting.

Better go and do some work,

Anne

[Doolhof]

Dear Anne,

Hi. It is great you have tried to reach out to July. It might be that she is having a bad time herself, she could be on holidays, may have computer troubles, there could be a lot of reasons why she has not been back to you yet.

I know I quite often think people have not responded because they can't be bothered with me. That is just my depression speaking to me in total negativeness. So just wait a little while and see what happens.

Card Making...I used to do that. Haven't done so in ages. It is a wonderful way to use your creativity and express your own ideas.

At the moment I am crocheting a blanket and trying to make crochet flowers.

It is understandable that your chat with your psychiatrist has brought up all kinds of emotions in you. Do you have anyone at your volunteer job who knows about your depression or even about your son in jail?

If so, would it help to just mention to them you are struggling a little and would they have time for a chat?

You don't even need to chat about any of your issues, just chat about the weather, the garden, card making or anything. It helps me to feel better about life when I am able to do that.

Maybe you could make a card on the weekend and send it to your son. You could just write something like "Thinking of you" and then post it. I am not sure what you discussed with your psychiatrist and what they may have recommended. So I don't want to confuse you at all in your thinking.

I hope to make time for some gardening and craft on the weekend. I also need to give the chook house a good clean out and the canary cage too!

Hope you have a lovely day!

Cheers for now and sending hugs your way, from Lauren

[Hopefullseeking]

Hi Lauren

Chooks how wonderful, before I moved into my unit my next door neighbour had chooks and I got eggs all the time.  Nothing nicer than fresh eggs, I was spoilt as I can only eat organic eggs now, the others taste horrid. Ha, ha.

I have heard back from July which was wonderful, he son is now where my son was when he was inside but it didn't last.  I so hope her son is different but unfortunately only time will tell.

I make cards on request from friends and have a 80th, 13th and male, cards to make this weekend. Will give me something to do.

There is only one person at my volunteer job who knows of my depression and about my son and that is the manager, she is away at the moment.  She has troubles with her son to so we support each other in that. I don't like to talk to much as I get teary with her and after all it is a work place and really she is my boss, at times I feel it isn't appropriate to talk and other times it seems ok. She has been so supportive of my depression I wouldn't still be there if it wasn't for that support.

It is my son's birthday next month but I can't make him a card, it wouldn't be allowed through security, being hand made it could be laced with drugs, that's their thinking anyway.  I will buy him a nice card and send that to him.  At least he will know I am thinking of him.

My psychiatrist can be blunt and often doesn't beat about the bush so she believes he is damaged goods and may stay that way.  Hard to hear but I do understand as I often think that to.  If you want to you can go to July's post and read my summary of my son, it's not pretty.

I want to do some weeding this weekend but at the moment I am in a lot of pain with my arthritis so that my not be possible.  I will wait and see.

My unit is finished now all I need is a new couch.  It looks wonderful, what a difference.  It's bright and homely, makes me feel good to be at home.

Have a wonderful weekend and give your chooks a pat from me.

Thanks so much for you support.

Anne

[Doolhof]

Hi Anne,

I did read your post to Anne. It must be very difficult for you both to have sons in jail. As I may have mentioned before, I can not begin to imagine how you both feel.

An example of that is I would never have thought for a minute that a hand made card might not get into a prison! There is just so much I take for granted before I am aware life happens differently for people!

It is great you and July have connected. Hopefully you will be a support for each other and maybe for people you may never know have been touched by your words.

Sorry to read your arthritis is playing up. I know when my back is aching it can be very frustrating when I am wanting to get jobs done here at home. I usually save up my energy and strength for work and then return home in pain and exhausted.

Today we drove to a River Murray town called Morgan where they have a "Fun Weekend" I think they called it. This is the second year they have held it.

The weather was beautiful, glorious sunshine and no wind or rain in sight. The river looked so peaceful and calm. There were all sorts of stalls along the bank selling food to clothes, port barrels to jewellery.

There were lots of things I would have liked to have bought, including jewellery, paintings, a coat from Nepal, a scarf with a clasp and so much more. We did buy ourselves some lunch so that was our treat for the day.

We wandered around and enjoyed the atmosphere. My husband drove so I was able to look at the country side. Some of it was still dry dusty paddocks and salt bush. Closer to where we live we have green hills and crops growing in the paddocks.

This afternoon I let the chooks out for a while. They can be quite hilarious. I gave them a pat from you by the way! I like it when they dig and shoot stuff all over each other. They don't seem to care if they get sprayed with dirt and grass, it is like they just expect it so it doesn't matter. We humans could learn a thing or two about that!

It would be a lot easier if we could let what ever is slung at us just fly off our backs so to speak!

A couple of chooks were practising "Synchronised digging" standing side by side. They made me laugh watching them.

Hope you have enjoyed your day and you find the simple joys in life as well.

Cheerio for now, from Lauren 

[Hopefullseeking]

Hi Lauren

Yes it is a bit of a shock when you see the other side of things.  I sent my son a note book once and it was sent back to me, not appropriate, I couldn't figure out why, then someone asked 'did it have a metal ring binder, yes it did.  That can be used as a weapon, I didn't even think of that when I sent it to him.

Yes my arthritis is bad atm, rain is coming, I have tried to rest up this weekend but it hasn't helped much and the pain doesn't help my depression much. I have a fatty liver so can not take antinflammitories or pain killers, makes life a bit tough sometimes.

Still I reached my goal for the weekend, to make three birthday cards, so I am happy with that.

You sound like me when going to the markets, I see so much I want to buy, everything is tempting but the budget doesn't allow it so I don't.

I hope the chooks enjoyed their pat.  If I lived on a property or even a big backyard I would love chooks but I am flat out looking after my flat.  My depression and arthritis hinder what I am capable of, if both are ok then I get a lot done otherwise I do what is essential only.

The chooks synchronised scratching sounds a treat, I love watching nature at work, love sitting on my patio and watching the birds in the trees.  I visit a friend who lives in a retirement settlement and their are two big lizards that roam around and will sneak inside if you leave the door open. Their is a tree snake to but I haven't seen it yet.

A new café has opened up across the road from me, last sunday and this morning I brought a take away coffee and sat on my patio with the morning paper, felt really nice, a treat, so might do it again next sunday.

Hope you have a wonderful week, will speak to you soon

Anne

[neleke]

i started my day quite good. Made pancakes for breakfast for everyone. Then i decided to make bread rolls in bread maker, they turned out great. A bit of time on my laptop. Then my son has to spoil it all and misbehave,  I had to give both my kids a smack today. They always play up when dad is out.

Had some quiet time in spare room, then did some sewing.

made vege soup for dinner.

[Indra]

Started early as usual - my older son who has Autism is not a sleeper! Day slid downward travelled to see the grandparents as my mum hadn't been well. Both boys excited to go, but for my older one it was too overwhelming and he had a melt down when he realized we weren't staying overnight. Got home and he settled  after awhile - just a normal day really aaarrghh