Hey splinter,
Just wanting to send you some support and encouragement. I wonder if you can pinpoint anywhere that the negative emotions might be coming from? Or is it more kind of amorphous, which I know those feelings often are? I remember how full on it was when I finished Year 12, so I wonder too if that was a lot to go through and then you are processing this new environment at uni with the new challenges it brings?
Sometimes I find not labelling emotions as negative but more allowing and exploring them helps them to become clearer. I’ve found trying to suppress emotions I experience as negative and overcome them with positive thinking sometimes doesn’t entirely work and I have to allow the emotion to be and listen to what it’s telling me, if that makes sense? Just being with it often helps to begin to alleviate it too.
When I was at uni I used the free uni counselling service and I imagine your uni would have such a service too. So if you feel you would like some counselling support that could be a good option. I was fortunate to get a very good psychologist to speak with at my uni.
I can relate to what you write as I spent much of my life being the person who was very outwardly positive and optimistic and often looking after others. I’m learning to prioritise myself a lot more now and getting better at self-care. It may be that you can build some self-care strategies into your daily life such as some activities you really enjoy every day. I can hear you are already doing this with things like focussing on aspects of health.
I would also say definitely don’t worry about comparing yourself to others. Just focus on what your needs are with tenderness and care. It can be easy to be hard on yourself but it’s so important to be kind to yourself. Perhaps there is a trusted relative or friend you can confide in too?
Go gently and I hope you can find some peace and enjoyment in your uni studies and daily life. Happy to chat more if you would like.
All the best,
ER
