Distraction - the Best Medicine...

[Tonic]

Hi, Bipolar NOW (as of 2003), But Depressive since aged 14. Load O Sh*t Happening.

I Learned Distraction Early.. 15? My Mind was in Guilty, Depressive Turmoil every night, Insomnia and more.

I got a PILLOW SPEAKER - plastic disk with cable, small speaker inside. To Distract Thoughts, Break up the Negative Cycles of despair. First I listened to music& talk back radio, late at night. Learned some Interesting things - the 2UE/2KO Twin City Show (link up).

Then I got a cassette player that would keep reversing/switching and playing end to end.

Sometimes Music, sometimes Comedy Tapes. Monty Python albums, Billy Connolly, USA's George Carlin... I had more comedy albums than music aged 14 - 16. Learned some Great Routines too.

Very Good Distraction, cost me about $6.95 for the speaker...

When my Mum was going into catatonic depression after DAD passed away, I got her a Radio and Pillow Speaker - Just in case The Magic still worked... (It didn't really. Mum had one Course of Shock Treatment, worked wonderfully Well, No headaches, loss of memory and the effect Permanent, not transitory for a few weeks only.)

WALKING....

Got put on a NEW WUNDERDRUGG for Bipolar a few years back.

I stopped that drug immediately, but Going OUT for a walk was the ONLY Distraction that Aleviated it in any way... I read that the Panic Attack Thing happened in about 10% of Patients.

Dropped the SSRI, didn't seem to be DOING anything.

 I used to feel I was about a meter below the surface of the water, looking up.. Now I BOB on The Surface! 🙂 And Any DEPRESSIONS Not nearly so bad as before, Must Hold One's Mood DOWN further..?

Some stuff to think on!

Kindest Regards

TONIC the BARD

[Sophie_M]

Hi Tonic,

Thank you for sharing with us here about what has worked for you. It can be such a journey trying to figure out what best works for us and it is wonderful that you have found some great ways to take care of your mental health. 

We love to hear positive stories so thank you once again for sharing this with the community 🙂

Kind regards
Sophie M

[BlueLily]

Hi Tonic,

Welcome to the forum and thanks for sharing your very interesting post. I enjoyed reading that.

Sorry to hear that you've been suffering from depression since you were 14. But it seems you've learnt various tools along the way to keep yourself BOB on the surface!

I have a friend who's much more older and suffering from bipolar but too fragile to realise that he's sick. Therefore, he's not able to take any medication nor seeking proper help. So hearing your journey is amazing because I've experienced how difficult it can be. 

Also why not add other interesting hobbies to your list of distractions that not only keep your time occupied but also create new friendships. To name a few suggestions, board games, cycling and hiking.

[Tonic]

Thank you, Sophie and Lily 🙂

Drugs AND Therapy needed for Most conditions, and Mental Tricks like DISTRACTION are gold to have in your Tool Box.

I WROTE My way out of a hole in first and second Manias, about 8 to 10 weeks each. SO I was Able (with the Boundless FOCUS and SPEED of mania) to jam about 10 years of therapy into a couple of months. I could look at the Most HORRIBLE Parts of My Past (and a LOT of NEW RECALL) without Flinching, and UN Pick how those incicdents affect the Way I Gut React to situations.

I also got a REAL Therapist, and he's one of the 35% of GOOD ones out there! Ex Vietnam Tank Sgt, No Coddling, but a wonderfully Kind and perceptive man, and EASY to TALK TO about Gnarley Things... He also used to Train the Phone Crisis Councellors for the (beyond?) BLUE Knot Foundation, Aus' Go To Survivor Org. He has had a Lot of experience in Child Abuse. I have taught HIM things too, in Up moods, how to tease out the Really SHY ones, as *I* used to be, and How I deal with certain Emotional problems, for HIS tool Box. Good Karma ALL ROUND! 🙂 Win Win Situation. 🙂

I know a surprising amount of How MY Mind Works, and can apply it to others. Sometimes Great Suffering (Sadistic Predator aged 12) can Open Doors in the Mind that Most cannot venture. I add the Madness to that! 🙂

"Sickness will surely take the Mind

Where Minds can't USUALLY Go,

Come ON the AMAZING JOURNEY

And Learn ALL Your Should Know!"  - The WHO, TOMMY 🙂

I once sent another BLISTERING Line from THE WHO to a Friend in Pennsylvania with a terminal disease. Often awake at 2am HER time, and we could text chat for hours.  She was shutting down a bit, Very Sad at her Fate (died aged 34, single mom) after a Horrific Childhood also. I only changed Two Words, Mr Townsend.

CHeers

David/TONIC! 🙂

"I will share Nightmares and Cold Stormy Seas

I Will take Over your GRIEF and Disease

I'll Stay Beside you and Comfort Your Soul

When you are Lonely and Broken and Low.."

[Tonic]

CRYING THERAPY...

GREAT for Letting the Pressure Off! Another good tool. Do it alone or with a friend but Do NOT Film yourself doing it on tic toc for sympathy, please. 🙂

Another tool I discovered aged 9. When it ALL got too Much for me, I'd shut myself in my room and put on a mix tape of sad music, and cry into my pillow for a while, so No One would Hear me.

I always felt Better/Calmer/ more Tolerant and Emotionally Relieved afterwards.

Since Going Bipolar, I can turn it on and off like a tap at need.

GUYS too!!! 🙂

I have Broken through to some Guy Survivors by posting the CLip from GOOD WILL HUNTING - Matt and Robin (RIP) "It Wasn't YOUR FAULT" scene. THAT is Lesson No ONE!

Lesson Two is "You are NOT ALONE in What happened to you."

Take it AWAY Matt & ROB!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQht2yOX9Js&t=15s

[Eagle Ray]

Hi Tonic! 🙂

Welcome and I just wanted to say I loved reading your posts and the way you have expressed things.

I know what you mean about crying and how it can help, and how sad music/songs can help us feel and release our pain. I once heard the musician and producer Daniel Lanois speak about this. There is a principle in sound recording/engineering called phase cancellation where the same two frequencies directed directly at one another cancel one another out. He extended this to the experience of sad music which he calls emotional phase cancellation. The music resonates with our own sadness and allows its release thus easing our pain.

That is a powerful scene from Goodwill Hunting. Thank you for sharing it. It’s a message many of us need to hear 🙏

Thank you for sharing your experiences and what has worked for you. I agree distraction is wonderful! Mine is photography. It can take me out of suffering and I get completely absorbed in it.

Very best wishes,

Eagle Ray

[Tonic]

Hi Ray! 🙂

"Glad to Be of Service!" - The Sirius Cybernetics Corporation 🙂

Music and Writing MY THINGS, but better writer than Musician, as a younger guy. I didn't Practice enough, if I couldn't play a song Easily/Quickly, I'd shelve it. Keyboards/Bass guitar/Celtic Harp (22 stings, a little one)/Tin whistle. Thinking of getting a Theremin, but would love a Valve/TUBE one, no digital Auto Correct thank you.

I ran an 8 track Demo Studio when I was 22 - 23. TASCAM 80-8 & Tascam Desk.

Emotional Noise Cancellation - Cool. I have about 8 Different kinds of Sad SOngs for Certain Moods. Up lifting, or resonating sorrow... Love Daniel. Heard of him when he Produced for Peter Gabriel, who I love. We used to do his song "Jolie Louise" in a Folk Band I was was it. Cool sad song, I WAS a Rum Drinker, and I like how you can pick out the French, from Context, or obvious repetition in English. "En belle maison ala fontaine.." In a nice house by the fountain?" I sing two songs in Phonetic German too, and one in Latin.

Glad you enjoy your Photography! I have a friend who still does black and white FILM from choice, and was able to get some Amazing Cameras cheap when film started to die out. Hassleblads and Rolliflexes and the like.

Got to have SOME Hope and Purpose in your life, or you are Only EXISTING, Not Living. 🙂

Nice to Meet you!

David/TONIC

Here is a SONG of Mine, recorded for me by a Friend who was a MUCH Better musician than me, and SUNG by him also. Jason (Paris) does an Elton John Show.

Just got this song LYRIC (About Breaking THE Silence of Abuse, Huge First Step, took me till age 43, 36 years silence). The LINK to it was printed in the BLUE KNOT FOUNDATION newsletter. They have printed stuff of mine before. Only song of mine with Lyrics! They came in about 40 minutes, one Madness.

Enjoy!

D/T

[Tonic]

Your LANGUAGE!! 🙂

I don't know much French. Did one term each at year 7 of French, German, Spanish and Latin. My Big Bro did French so a LITTLE more there - he used to translate the School's FRENCH editions of ASTERIX the GAUL. 🙂

He was a Sweet Big Bro who did not know my inner Horrors, and Even tried to teach me MATH! 🙂

"You don't even Speak your own LANGUAGE!!!!!!!

You don't READ it any more,

You Don't WRITE IT any more,

The FUTURE, Your LANGUAGE!!!!!" - Frank Zappa. Not an Uber Fan, sometimes his stuff sounds Crap to me, and COMPLEX for the SAKE Of Being Complex. Crap to MY ear! But a FUNNY GUY!! 🙂

Love the SOUNDS of ALL Languages. Even German, in Music, had a Vienna Boys Choir record that melted my heart as a kid. Latin Awesome.

I had a FRIEND in Columbia South America a while back. He spoke 8 Languages, was learning his Ninth, Irish Gaelic. Told him it was My Most BEAUTIFUL SUNG Language. He said PORTUGEUSE was Prettier. We Agreed to Disagree, it was a bit a bit Harsh and Gutteral to me, compared to the Musical CHUCKLE of Irish. 🙂 Sana played Spanish Guitar, his Wife Played CONGA Drums along with him, and he sent me a Beautiful Tribute to be read out at my Mum's Funeral, they had ALL Loved What I had TOLD of her, over the Years.. 🙂

But I have MASTERED *ENGLISH!* 🙂

[Eagle Ray]

Hello D/T!

Wow, you ran a studio! I wanted to be a record producer at one stage, from about the age of 17. I was actually inspired by a Daniel Lanois documentary I saw where he was so supportive of the artists he worked with. He is such a nurturer of the artists and their talent, not just someone managing the sound/music production. I love Peter Gabriel too. His music seems to come from the most raw place, like it is not filtered but is coming from the gut almost. I was 11 when his album So came out and somehow several songs just connected with some deep part of myself that was looking for solace and healing (largely unconsciously at that age) because there was tension and trauma in my family environment. The song Red Rain has always powerfully connected, like it is the rising of anguish and the diminishing of anguish - the full processing of emotional turmoil before coming to a resting peace. Several more tracks I love from that album too. I know "Jolie Louise". Daniel has done so much interesting music over the years, starting with those French Canadian cultural roots.

I learned to process black and white film in a media class in high school. I loved it. I only shoot digital now but feel privileged to have had the opportunity to do film processing. It was my favourite thing in high school, followed by music class.

D/T, I'll see if I can find your song in the Blue Knot newsletter. I won't look just now because I really have to go to bed after a poor sleep last night, but I will look it up. I have found Blue Knot to be awesome. I have called them a number of times. They get trauma and the sorts of things needed to feel safe.

Sleep well!

Eagle Ray