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Constantly explaining and apologising
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Dear lovely lady, Sen
Thanx for sharing this – and wowee, what a powerful post it is.
You’ve probably thought of this so often anyway, but just thought I’d mention it as one of the first things that springs to my mind – was how awfully you were treated those years ago!
And this is by people who would be paid damn well in their respective professions – paid well, and at the same time, have a key responsibility and you’d think similar duty of care for their patient. But no, I didn’t read that at all for what you experienced.
You were screaming for help and what did you get – some crap woman who smirked at you and some other tool who said that’s really silly of you! Boy oh boy, that makes me angry about them.
And now you’ve got some people that you’ve recently dealt with, yeah, who are bringing up these instances from your past?? While it’s absolutely fantastic that you’re now off medication, and you’ve been doing all these wonderful things to keep yourself on a positive path forward, it just shows unfortunately that if you get obnoxious idiots in your life, how they can trip you up and cause jolt in your recovery process. We need to weed these numbskulls out of our lives.
I am so glad you’ve come here and explained it – my last attempt was about 6 years ago (at the time, I had a 10yo son and a 7yo daughter). I don’t know how I would react if someone said that I was dumb or stupid, etc for what I attempted then. From mine, my partner knows obviously as well as my 3 mates who saved me. Nothing has ever been spoken about it since – it’s difficult Sen, because it all depends on who knows and how they take it. It’s a bit like announcing at work about your depression – you just never know how someone will take it – and could use it against you.
You’ve got physical scars (as you’ve mentioned) but emotional scars as well to deal with every day.
Can I just say though, that if you WANT to moan/groan/vent/let off steam, etc etc, you now what I’m talking about – Sen, you can do it here and you can do it over and over again.
We’re here for you. We’ll support you. You’re embedded deeply in this Beyond Blue community (family, if you will) and you’re safe in our collective arms.
Neil
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Dear vip
Small towns - yes, news can spread quite quickly can't it.
Damnit, again I get so annoyed when I hear accounts of someone in deep trouble, deep stress, but only to be spoken to or dealt with badly by these so called, "professionals". You'd hope that nothing ever happens to any of their close relatives like this and for them to suffer the same kinds of awful treatment.
Yes, vip, it's a matter of battling along each day. That's also another good way of answering the age old, "How are you?" "Oh, I'm battling - just battling away".
I would love to shake your hand one day. 🙂
Neil
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Yes it is.
Life is roller coaster, we just have to ride it.
Something is a mystery and da dah dah dah ...
Ronan Keating I think - but vip, we've just gotta sit, hold on tight and ride it.
ps: I hate roller coasters - the only one I've ever been on is the one at Movie World on the Gold Coast - it was the Road Runner one - for kids, and all the kids had a wow of a time - it freaked me out like you wouldn't believe.
Neil
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