Would you want to know?

[jojo05]

I've already gone into the details of my separation from my husband so i wont retell it all again, what im after is a bit of advice on something I've recently found out.

Last week i found out theres a strong possibility my husband has got the OW pregnant, i know he wont come forward and tell me himself because hes not exactly the most honest man around but i think it would be the respectful thing to do considering we've only been separated for 4 months.

I've thought about asking him straight out because i want to know if its true. We have been in contact most of the time since he left but over the past 3 weeks he hasnt contacted me at all and i think this maybe the reason, im just guessing thou.

Would any of you want to know and how would you go about asking?

[pipsy]

Dear jojo05. Lynda here. For my own peace of mind, I would ask him straight out. You know him, you would know if he was telling you the truth or not. Do you know the OW, would it be better asking her? How do you feel about this? Once you know, how will you react? There are some circumstances where not knowing is better. If you really feel that strongly and want to know, the best thing to do is ask him or her. Can you see him to ask, otherwise is there anyone who knows him that you trust to ask. It's a bit of a dilemma, either way. Perhaps write to him, email, fb, phone. Were you considering reconciliation, if OW is pregnant, that settles that. Find out once and for all, once you know, then the next call is yours. Be prepared for 'yes', more so than 'no.

[jojo05]

Hi Lynda, thanks for the reply.

No i dont know the OW, dont think i want to ever met her to be honest, we dont live in the same state at the moment so the only way to ask is email or phone.

I was hoping at one point we could sort things out but now im not really considering it. I feel pretty peed off about it especially only after the short amount of time we've been separated but I've always thought he left to be with someone else or already had someone before he left, i dont really know how I'll react if its true, i guess if its true then theres not alot i can do about it.

[pipsy]

Hi jojo. All I can add to what I've said, is think before you do anything. Do you really want to know? Once you know, how does that change what's happened. I feel sorry that you've sort of found out. Obviously you suspected, suspecting is one thing. Knowing is another. If it's true and you feel bad, upset, betrayed, if you want to 'vent' BB is always here.