Wanting to keep the baby but my bf want to abort

[Fany910]

Hi there

I am 40 years old this month, I was accidentally pregnant with my bf. I am on 4 weeks pregnant now. We lived together for 10 months now. We both have a job. I am on 485 visa now but my bf cannot sponsor me as he had sponsor 2 women before. I want to keep the baby no matter what. I even offer my bf to provide financially as I have saving and my salary is higher than him. But he said he is not ready to have baby now as he still have a personal loan ($8k) and need to help his mom for nose surgery. Other thing is he is not mentally ready as he broke up with his ex gf last year (Nov 2022). So he is still emotionally not stable.

Why I want to keep the baby because I am 40 years old now, not sure if in the future I will have a baby again. I know my visa will be on risk but I don’t care as long as I can keep the baby.

Can someone please help me to decide? I can’t tell my sisters or my parents as I am Asian and they will judge me if I am having baby before marriage. Thank you so much

[Sophie_M]

Hi Fany910,

Welcome to the forums and thank you for sharing your story with us here.

We are sorry to hear that things have been so hard on you recently and that you are having to go through a pregnancy without much support. We can only imagine how difficult and scary this time must be for you, especially considering your visa difficulties. Please know that you never have to go through this alone, and support is always here for you.

If you would like to talk to someone, the Beyond Blue Support Service is available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 1pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport  One of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk through these feelings with you and can offer support, advice and referrals.

We also strongly urge that in any overwhelming moments you get in touch with our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) or the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467).

We hope that you will find some comfort here on the forums. Please feel free to keep reaching out here on your thread whenever you feel up to it.

Kind Regards,

Sophie M