Struggling with partner overseas

[Sarah-Jane112]

My partner of a year is currently overseas for a six week trip. We’re a couple weeks into it and I’m struggling with him being away, for a couple of reasons: 

- communication is okay (mainly via messages), but not as much as I’d like. He sometimes takes hours to respond even though I can see he’s active on social media and what’s app, but leaving my messages unread. This makes me feel upset and frustrated, and I don’t really understand why he does it. I’m worried to bring this up and make a big deal about it and fear I’ll push him away.

- I have insecurities as my last long term partner cheated and left me for another woman. My bf is aware of this, and I would hope that he understands I may need some extra reassurance at times. I have noticed he’s adding people on IG including other women he’s met over there. I’m not totally comfortable with this. And on one phone call we have had so far, he told me about a ‘really cool girl they’d met and hung out with a couple of times…’ which made me worry. Am I being irrational?

- I feel like there’s a distance between us (which I was feeling before he left) and I’m worried he’s reconsidering the relationship.

the reason for the post, is I’d like to get some advice and other’s perspectives - am I worrying too much and letting my past experience and insecurities get the better of me? (My anxiety, concentration and sleep have been really bad). Should I just give him the space he needs to think things through and not bother him? And let him come to me when he’s ready? 

[tranzcrybe]

Does partner have any doubts that you might not be there for him at the end of the six weeks? Do you think he (or you) should?
Not sure why you weren't on this trip also so it doesn't sound too promising, tbh, but constant communication may be defeating the purpose as you both could be reevaluating the relationship for where things can improve and what assumptions are being made.
His behaviour in your absence might be setting the precedent for future strife in your relationship if you just sit faithfully by your window for his return. What you will and will not tolerate is being tested and defined so be sure to differentiate your emotional needs from longer term requirements for a healthy and mutually respectful relationship into the future.

[Overthinking_m3]

In my opinion, you need to have this out with him. He needs to know how you feel about being left on read, because to be quite honest, as you should be the most important person in this gentleman’s life, taking time to reply should be a nothing thing. It does not make you insecure to be anxious about this behaviour, I’m sure most of us would feel the same way.