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Struggling with my parents

Community Member

So I've got ptsd from childhood trauma with both my parents 

I'm now 22 and have a nearly 3 year old 

My parents have always made me feel like yhe black sheep or that I'm not cared about compared to my 2 older brother who are like angels in there eyes 

My parents got angry with me when I feel pregnant and wasnt very supportive  in anything and after I had my son they have only showed up on his birthday and that's it 

They never make the effort with him or try he got the most stupid toy for his last bday (a bla kit for $10  that was just really sad cause my brothers child got something way more expensive   (brand new xbox and he's 6 )and he's not the blood grandchild 

I live 40 mins from them and they both work in the same town I live and has never pooped over for a visit or coffee nothing 

But they will make a 10 hr drive and spend $1000 of dollars on my brothers and there kids but won't take the time to see me and my son 

I get a big lecture  when ever I ask for something such as a bottle of milk or $10 

I have brought this up with both my parents about how I feel and how much my  son is the one missing out all I got back from them was I'm sorry u feel that way

I don't care how you treat me but my son deserves better grandparents  it's like my parents don't give a shit about me or my son or my partner 

We don't get invited anywhere 

I havet even been invited to my brothers wedding 

I was homeless and car less for a year my parents had a caravan a car they weren't using I asked to borrow  them till I find a place noooopppppeee 

My brother is now in the same situation I use to be in and he git given the car to keep and  both caravans  makes so much sense 

I honestly  don't know what I'm asking for Just if I'm in my right mind to be angry and for feeling like I want nothing g to do with them anymore cause I don't want my son growing up with such horrible grandparents  that won't put effort in to see him As I said I'm done and don't care with how they treat or talk to me anymore I've moved on from that I just hate that there now doing it to my son when he has done nothing to deserve  the isolation  there giving him 

It's braking my heart to see all these other grandparents  being so involved  and for my parents to be so involved in the other grandchildren  but not my son 

I  don't know what to do anymore 

1 Reply 1

Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Ontheedge19~

Welcome here ot the forum, at least we are friendly here. I can empathize with you and your situation and know it is really heartbreaking.


When one is growing up often kids will idolize their parents and it comes as a complete shock when you find out they are mean, self centered and not loving in the least. I had the same thing wiht my choice of partner and my parents never contacted our offspring, in fact they never met (my parents are now both passed away)


Frankly I'm not sure they were much loss as they were a toxic influence and who wants their children exposed to that?


Can I ask if anyone in the family is on you side - your brothers for instance? At least one of them must have been in the same sort of situation as you before he was rescued.


I don't blame you for being angry in the least, it is only natural and they do not deserve anything else from you


You love your son and want the best for him and I'm sure that will be enough even without grandparents


You know you are welcome here anytime, even if it is just to blow off steam