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Someone to talk to / vent my frustration

Guest_3847
Community Member

Hello all need someone to talk / vent to

My wife and I have been married for 22 years with have two late teenage boys

My wife suffers from has depression and trauma induced PTSD she has made 4 attempts on her life since Dec the last one was the day after my birthday

I feel like I’m a slave in this relationship as I do 90 to 95% of the house hold chores And I work full time

my wife has no attention to detail and forgets to do things because of her depression which causes issues in your relationship

her depression is dragging me down into one as well as I now longer want to do my hobbies

I no longer talk or communicate with friends or family

i don’t want to say anything in case I’m the cause of attempts or be accused of gaslighting

3 Replies 3

Sophie_M
Moderator
Moderator
Hi  Guest_3847,

We are so sorry to hear about what you're going through; it sounds like it has been a really tough time. Thank you for being part of our forums, it takes a lot of courage and strength to reach out for support and we are so glad that you have done so. We hope that you can get some support here, the community will be here to listen and chat with you, and I'm sure someone will be along soon to offer some of their wisdom and caring support. 

Please don't forget that you can also reach out to Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636 to speak to a trained mental health professional (completely confidentially - 24/7), or even via our webchat service here: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/support-service/chat

We also have some really helpful links to information that may be helpful for you:
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/personal-best/pillar/supporting-others
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/supporting-someone

Living with depression, and with someone who is depressed is not easy and we understand that it's been hard for you as well. Please take care of yourself, and continue to reach out - we're here for you.

Kind regards,

Sophie M

Sophia16
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi,

Thank you for being open here. That sounds very difficult to deal with. You have been very strong throughout your relationship and should be proud of yourself.

You mentioned that you can't do any of your hobbies anymore. I know that you care very much for your wife but you are also a human and you deserve to live your life. Maybe on the weekends, make time for yourself away from your wife and try to hang out with friends.

Stay safe and i am always here to chat.

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello Guest_3847, I'm sorry you are in a very difficult situation and although you do most of the work at home, a position like this can cause someone like you to develop depression on your own, but pretend nothing is wrong and still fulfil the chores that are needed.

It is certainly a great worry for you knowing what your wife is capable of doing and wonder if she has been admitted to a hospital, which you are entitled to do and ring the police for her own protection, then she can get the help that's required.

If this is done, then you need to get the help for yourself because this mustn't be ignored and also for your kids who can contact Kids Helpline 1800 55 1800 by phone, web chat or online, and for you the best place to start is with your doctor, they can then advise help for you as well as your kids.

Sophie has also given you some links to look at and please there is much more to talk about, so hope you can get back to us.

Geoff.