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Separated and need to move out

Community Member

I've made the heartbreaking decision to leave my husband after 14 years of marriage. I have had enough of being gaslighted and feeling physically and emotionally neglected in the marriage. Couples counselling did not work for us because he wasn't honest and deflected his issues my way. I've had individual counselling and was told that my husband may have Avoidant Personality Disorder.

My physical health is suffering from the strain of living with him. I've told him my intentions to leave. He acts dejected but does not make any attempts to save the relationship. I don't want it to be saved. I want to move on and learn to be happy again.

I'm wanting to move out but I have no regular income. Rental applications ask for income details and I only have savings. I don't think I'm eligible for any benefits. I've been a stay at home mum. I've enrolled to do some industry refresher courses in the hope to secure some part time work.

I'm not comfortable living at home because my husband is unpredictable. I don't think he would hurt me physically but it's very hard not feeling heard where I am now.

I don't know where to go or what to do. I have family but they're unable to have me stay for a while.


Mumma Petal
1 Reply 1

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion
Hi, welcome

In 1996 when my marriage failed I purchased a caravan, towed it to a caravan park and paid weekly rent.

Depending on the agenda and number of your children this may or may not be feasible but it's certainly an idea. It can also a temporary set up and you can move around at will.

Futhermore, you could in time move it to a back yard of a friends house.

If you do this, my advice is to make sure your caravan has an ensuite. If your car can't tow the van pay someone to tow it and down the track buy a large car to tow it.

Best of luck.

Beyondblue topic the best praise you'll ever get