My husband suffering major depression

[Teags83]

My husband and i have been together for over 15yrs he has suffered major depression many years was treated. He decided to decrease medication as he wanted of them is now on on slow realese tablet. The Last 3 months have been quite hard due to we decided to sell our property and try and move into a bigger property with his mother. During this time His work got cut went downhill very quick and is also trying to support us all. I did get into a fight with his mum as he wasnt turning towards me then Told me needed space while dealing with this hard situation didnt no if he loved me anymore. We have 2 beautiful girls so i left him as didnt think to be in a heathly space at the time we have had many arguements over the yrs. He doesnt want to see me gets so much aniexty the thought of me and stress in everyday life i still love him and want to be there every step of the way im worried that this depression and aniexty is the end of our marriage.

[geoff]

hi Teags, welcome to the site and it'd good for you to post your comment.
There are a couple of issues that hit my in the face straight away, and that firstly is that your husband has decided to decrease his medication whether his doctor has agreed to this or not, because what often happens is that only not him but others who do the same do tend to fall back into how they were before they started taking the AD.
The second concern is that he has confided in talking to is mum rather than speaking to you, and what normally happens to someone with depression is that they want to be alone or leave the household and are not sure whether he still loves you or not, but that's depression talking, and doesn't actually mean what he says, it is said because he thinks that it won't stress you anymore, but that's wrong, because of course it does.
The finances are a great way for him to worry about how the bills will be paid, so this also adds onto his depression.
I know that he is on slow release or perhaps they maybe extended release, however what does concern me is that if you do move into his mother's house there maybe some conflict, because already it's started, and if you all live together then contact and communication is only going to be twice what it is now.
Does he have regular appointments with his doctor so that his medication can always be reviewed. Geoff. x

[pipsy]

Hi Teags83. Is your husband seeing his Dr regularly for monitoring his mood swings. With any sort of depression, your mind clouds and trying to maintain marriage, work, family gets muddled. Also when there's conflict either with hubby/wife or extended family (in-laws) that tends to make the problem worse. Do you normally get on with MIL or has there been issues with her in the past. If you and her are disagreeing, hubby's in the middle and trying to keep peace between two women make most men run for cover. He's in a very difficult situation with work, home etc and with depression, it makes it harder to sort things out. Reading back over your post, I gather you are apart, trying to talk to him while he is so mixed up is going to be extremely difficult as he might not be able to grasp what you're saying. Perhaps you might like to consider seeing a guidance counselor to get some ideas on how to communicate that you are concerned. A Dr might be able to get you a referral or suggest how to get in touch with someone. If you can get some help, then contact him to talk, he may see the difference in you and it may benefit him too. He could be scared about the 'stigma' attached depression/mental health. Is his mother a supportive person or would she turn her back. Depression can be scary to the uneducated.

Lynda