My First Panic Attack

[HelloGail]

My first panic attack I shall never forget, it was on Balmoral Beach 1963 when I was 3. My mother made the yummiest Butterfly Cakes to take with my large family to the beach. I remember watching with eagerly eyes as my mother placed each cake into a large light blue plastic square container. My parents and 5 siblings were walking ahead of me and I lost sight of them. I still remember crying and screaming but at the same time looking for the blue container as that would be my mum. Suddenly my 9 year old sister grabbed my hand and I was alright. The Second panic was in 1972 age 12, one of my brothers was in jail for a brief period and this set it off. He was in jail over Christmas 1972 and our large family really missed his presence. We all use to visit him in Long Bay which reinforced my anxiety. After Boxing Day 1972 my other brother age 17 drove my dad and sister to Brisbane to visit our grand parents. During the night drive he turned on Pink Floyd and the song with the heart beat in it somehow freaked me out and I turned to my dad beside me and shouted you got to get me to a hospital I'm dying. My father gave me the hardest and quick slap across my face. I do not recommend slapping but the shock of him slapping my face shocked me out of this strange panic. And so, these attacks have come and gone, it broke up my marriage, my husband couldn't handle it as I began to fear travelling and just wanted to stay home in my fish bowl of a town which I was then residing. My main help has been change of diet, no sugar, no caffeine, no chocolate, no preservatives. I do have one of these occasionally but I feel better when my system is free of them. Also positive thinking and just sheer DETERMINATION. Thank you for reading. Hope it may help understand panic attacks. 

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

An informative post, thankyou.

I've learned also that some people are born with tendencies to react worse than others to trauma. I've heard people say to me "just forget about it" etc. We are prone to anxious events more than the majority. That means if we have anxiety then we need treatment and should make decisions that ensure we care for ourselves in terms of our mental health.

Anxiety is curable but it can be a long road and one should be ready for consistent relaxation exercises etc. 

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-how-l-eliminated-it/td-p/183873

So, the thread above outlines many ideas to rid yourself of anxiety. I found spiritual home is a good one too. 

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/staying-well/meditation-words-of-wisdom-it-helped-me-for-25-year...

There is some mental illnesses that are born from trauma. My psychiatrist in 2009 focussed on an event that occured in our backyard swimming pool when I was 13yo and my brother 16yo. He'd suffered a fit under water. He lived but that trauma stopped me talking for 3 months, not one word. I didnt associate it to that event oddly enough but 40 years later I was diagnosed with dysthymia (as well as bipolar, depression etc). It was remarkable how they found that diagnosis.

So professional help cant be underestimated.

TonyWK

[HelloGail]

Hello White Knight, 

The excellent psychiatrist who was able to relate that frightening event of your loved one, 40 years ago and to get a diagnosis, dysthymia, must have been a profound understanding and relief for you. In one of your other posts you mentioned Prem (DLM). Aged 17, Adelaide 1977 I became an Aspirant and eventually a premie, attended Hans Jiyanti 1978 Orlando but I became mentally ill. I believed it was from meditating for ours under a blanket but the psychiatrist at the hospital Jan 1979 said to never meditate again. But Maharaji's  knowledge is worth listening to, amazing, I have one of Maharaji's VHS. I loved Satsang.