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Community Member

Hi im tony 33 i have anxiety and depression im on medication for ive been thro some bad times

I was arrested and sent to prison for somthing i didint do. Ive lost my job my wife has left me and is stoping me from see my daughter . I have no friends or family i dont get out much im bankrupt and cant get loans

I dont know wat to do or were to go my life is destroyed

5 Replies 5

Community Member

Hi Tonygilly1111,

Firstly, welcome to the forums.

I understand you are on medication for your anxiety and depression, are you also seeing a psychologist? or simply seeing a GP?

Is there anything you enjoy doing that could help you meet new people and try to make new friends, maybe a hobby? Maybe doing some volunteer work even? I am just thinking of ideas to meet new people and to try and make friends. I would also suggest now that you found these forums that maybe going to the thread "BB Cafe", it is a spot where a lot of people who are also suffering from mental health conditions and just want to talk about everything else other than that, just talking about fun sort of stuff.

My best for you,


Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Tony~

As Jay says, you are welcome here.

Whatever has happened in the past you are now faced with a pretty big challenge to get your life back on track. I guess it is not all going to happen at once but if taken in stages I'm sure you stand a pretty good chance of getting things together again.

First off with your anxiety and depression. Are you getting the best treatment you can and do you know enough about it to treat yourself properly? The sorts of things I mean include getting therapy from a psychologist if necessary - your GP can get a Mental Health Plan to do this if he thinks it is appropriate.

Also living as healthy as you can, eating as balanced a diet as possible, getting exercise regularly, and learning what triggers your anxiety and depression and taking steps to combat them. Getting good sleep.

I'd suggest having a read of The Facts menu above on anxiety and depression to see all the current information, including the various treatments. You can also look around here in the forum for how others have coped.

Its a very sad thing to be alone and not even seeing your daughter. Perhaps in time that may change. The same applies to a partner. I don't know the circumstances, perhaps you may get back together or you may in time meet someone else - I did when much older than you.

It's probably a hard thing for you to answer at the moment, but are there things you enjoy, or have enjoyed in the past? I mean like making things, music, pets .. well I'm not you, can only guess.

Jay was right too in suggesting meeting new people and making new friends. As he says one of the ways to do that is by giving some of the organizations a hand, St V de P, Salvos and so on. They are normally needing people to help out in their shops and kitchens. The RSPCA is another who always need volunteers.

If you are a religious person there are church groups too.

Another thing to consider is doing a course. I don't know what is available in your area, the local Library or Council will probably know.

I guess it is time for me to stop. Your going to be most welcome to post again and say more about yourself.


Community Member

Hi Tony,

My husband worked with someone who was in jail...he openly admitted it at work...he has a trade qualification...and no one thinks any less of him...my husband thought he was one of the best people he worked with...

I therefore think you need to focus on getting work qualifications..horticulture, some sort of trade etc....that isn't precious about your record...and values your skills...

then you could even work for yourself....if I were you I would focus on what you can do...in terms of your future and not beat yourself up about the past...your life is worth living as you have a daughter...your wife can not legally stop you from seeing her...

to be honest my kids and focusing on them and realising just how much they need me gets me though my hopelessness...as a grown woman my father is still very important in my life and has been a life saver now I have my own kids..he and my mother have kept things going for me...and my father had a few run ins with the law as a younger man...

as for your daughter, i woul

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni
hi Tony, have been able to prove to the courts that you are innocent, I realise that this is going to cost you more money, which you don't have, however you should be compensated, and if you have been told, them find a lawyer, maybe legal aid, who will go to court with you, settle on an amount, and their services will have to be paid by whomever.
You will then will able to take your ex to court, however this could be very costly, although it may seem to be simple at first, but it could drag on and the longer this happens the more money you may have to pay, so it's a gamble.
Can I ask how old she is, and please don't answer if you don't want to.
It's been a huge ordeal for you to try and cope with, especially when you knew you were innocent, and I'm sorry you are now bankrupt, and any loans would be from 'shark dealers' where the interest rate would be enormous.
At the moment your life does seem to be destroyed, because firstly you can't see your daughter, and secondly you have been thrown into the pits of bankrupties, but you won't be able to get on with your life if you carry all of this in one bundle, I know that seems to be a stupid comment, but you have to look at each problem separately, and first of all is to meet other people, starting with 'The Men's Shed' maybe a good start, and once you find someone you can relate with, then slowly progress from there.
It's not going to easy for you, I wish this wasn't the case, but stay here on the site and talk with other people who maybe going through what you have been or even similar. Geoff.

Community Member

Hi Tony,

your post was some time ago but I just wondered if you are still active on here.

I was incarcerated for about 80 days before the charges were dropped. I can still close my eyes and see the painted brick walls in there. Roughly 3 years on and I can still visualise the faces of other prisoners.

There doesn't seem to be any support for wrongly accused ex prisoners and in my state no compensation.

I hope your'e still hanging in there.