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I betrayed my boyfriends trust 😢

I_need_help1
Community Member

I've managed to push the last person I had in my life away from me tonight. The last year of our relationship hasn'tbeen the best. I've been so angry and upset at that that tonight my brain just snapped and I thought to myself "hmm what can I do to hurt him?"

I told him I'd make a case against him with my depression. I'm horrible. What person does that?

But he told me what trust I had...is now gone.

I need help. If anyone can recommend something other than medication or psycologist...please help. My intentions were to hurt and I've done much worse.

3 Replies 3

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni
hello Guest, when someone has a feeling of wanting to hurt someone they love, this normally comes under what we call 'intrusive thoughts', which would be good to google this or alternatively type it in the search bar at the top of the BB page, there it will show that so many have to cope with this, but more so try and understand why you have these thoughts.
After you have had a read of what it all says it would be good to hear back from you. Geoff.

JessF
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor
Hello I Need Help, I'm not sure if I understand your post. What do you mean "make a case against him with my depression"?

pipsy
Community Member

Hi Guest. Can I ask if you're angry with him or you? If your anger is self directed and you are lashing out at him, it could be it's easier to blame him than admit to being angry at you. Sometimes with depression the least thing said or done can cause a 'chemical reaction' to the system and we lash out to escape our pain by attempting to inflict the pain onto someone else, in this case your bf. If, too your bf (thinking he is helping) keeps asking if you're okay, this can be frustrating. Depression is not a defined condition, there are many causes and when we are constantly asked if we're 'okay' and we are unable to answer because we can't, this causes agro, big time. By all means google 'intrusive thoughts', hopefully it will guide you to understanding yourself and your anger/frustration better. I could be wrong about your bf's insistence about inquiring about your health. If he is ignoring you, this too can cause frustration and anger.

Lynda