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Gf broke up with me cause of her studies

Rete
Community Member

Me and my gf have been together for 2 yrs and things have been going great. We are both girls btw. This is my first relationship and I really thought she was the one. 2 wks ago she decided that it’s best we separate, she said she is choosing her studies over a relationship. I kept asking her how is that a reasonable explanation to break up and then she told me she doesn’t want to be the breadwinner. Then I just bursted and I wrote to her how she is so selfish etc and how she promised to always love me and we will be together forever. I found out today she deleted all our pics on her Instagram.

At the time she broke up with me she said that we could remain friends but after I lashed out she blocked me. I don’t know what to do now, I want to be with her. I have no friends at all and she was the only one to keep me company and now she is gone I have been crying everyday.

I don’t understand her reasoning? Why did she suddenly break up with me out of the blue? Is she really happy now that I’m not in her life?

11 Replies 11

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Rete, thanks and welcome to the site.

I'm sorry for what has happened and understand what has happened.

I just wanted to let you know that I will reply back to you tomorrow morning if that is OK, I only say this because a couple of people start first thing in the morning and for me it's time to logoff as I begin at midnight, but please don't take this as being you haven't been recognised, you certainly have.

Geoff.

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Rete, sorry I'm late in getting back to you, but from what you've said I think it may be more than choosing her studies over having a relationship with you, especially as she has blocked you, I wonder whether she has met another person, and I'm so sorry to mention this and hope I haven't upset you and if so, my apologies.

If you can get back to us then we can talk about it a little more.

Please take care.

Geoff.

Rete
Community Member

Hi Geoff, thanks for your reply.

I don’t think she has met anyone yet cause she has been distant from her friends from what I know. However, Her reason to break up due to her studies is a bit odd and I’m struggling to accept it. I still want to remain friends with her tho and I’m tempting to email her..

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Rete, has she replied to any of your emails?

It's awful when someone you want to be friends with or even love decide to close the door on you because there are so many memories when you are left in the house by yourself.

I'm sorry it's not easy and hope you do hear back from her.

Geoff.

Rete
Community Member
I haven’t written her an email yet cause I’m not sure if I should just leave her alone? It hurts me that she hasn’t contacted me again or unblocked me.

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello Rete, I think that's the million dollar question, but this decision is something you have to make, whether you want to try and contact her or the effort will drain you.

Is there a chance you could ask her if you can have partial contact with her only by email or SMS, and if this happens, it's still going to give you expectations that may not eventuate.

This is what is going to worry me, your doubt and hope which can cause many misconceptions about whether she still loves you.

Have you seen your doctor, but please can you get back to me .

Take care.

Geoff.

Rete
Community Member

Hi Geoff, it really is driving me insane. I know she will be on break the whole of next week so she would be free. I am just wondering what she is doing right now.

I think I will try to refrain myself from contacting her until she does first. Cause if she still wants to talk to me then she will. It still hurts so much.

No, I haven’t seen a doctor and I have social anxiety.

I wish and hope she will talk to me again. I feel extremely lonely.

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Rete, oh boy, I know how hard it must be for you, losing the love who has just cut you off.

The test will be while she has a few days off and if there is no contact, by any means, I think her decision has been made, unfortunately.

As you have social anxiety a doctor can refer you to a psychologist on a mental health plan, so you can talk on a one to one basis, and I'm only saying this because of your friend who may have led the way.

Are you able to make some changes in your life that may help you.

I'd be interested to know what you do and what you like to do during the day.

Take care.

Geoff.

Rete
Community Member

I’m really in a mess right now I keep replaying all our memories together and well we used to get along. I don’t know how she changed her mind so fast.

I’m still crying over her..

I don’t think I can see someone outside to get help. I don’t know if it can helped.