Hi J&M. Being let down by anyone is hard, when it's someone you thought was a friend, it's harder. I would say this girl possibly doesn't realize what being a 'true' friend is. With severe alcohol abuse, as she obviously has, she may not even remember any promise she made to you regarding confidences. If she made certain promises to you while she was 'under the influence', there's an extremely good chance she has no recollection. I'm not excusing her behaviour, it's just that I know from experience, people who have drink problems can turn nasty, even violent. There's nothing you can do to change her, she needs help. Alcohol abuse also means selfishness. Even though she is probably aware of your problems, her alcohol addiction means she will drink before doing anything else. I am a recovering alcoholic and I know I let people down, repeatedly. I have been 'dry' for over 7 months, but I have been where your female friend is, many, many times. I quite likely betrayed my friends too, I have no idea. I do know how hard it is to stop drinking. If your paths cross again, which, no doubt they will, be careful, but don't provoke her. If she asks to see you, just tell her 'no', your job forbids patronizing with customers. She may abuse you for this, but stick to your guns. After a while, her need for alcohol will force her to go somewhere else. I'm hoping for her sake, she gets help. I'm not siding against you, just talking from the 'other side' of the coin. Alcohol abuse is damaging, you lose everyone and everything. Admitting to being an alcoholic is hard. It's only this year, I finally admitted. I started drinking when I was at school. I'm in my 60's and for the first time ever, I can remember things I've said and done for the past 7 months. It's cost me friends, my home, I almost lost my kids, g'kids.
Lynda
