Dear Franzi,
It is great you are reaching out when you are feeling this way. It is a big thing to move to an outback town on your own and coming out of a toxic relationship. I moved to a regional town last year following a very traumatic period in my life. I didn’t know anyone in the town and was struggling alone in a kind of traumatised collapse. So I can relate to some of what you describe. But very slowly I have got to know people including some nice neighbours and some lovely, friendly ladies at a local cafe I visit from time to time. But I’ve also needed my solitude too as a kind of self-recovery thing.
I’d just thought I’d mention those things as I’ve found it’s a process of being gentle and kind to yourself. Over time you are likely to gradually get to know people and feel less alone. It just can be quite a disorienting thing at first being in an entirely new environment and also dealing with processing coming out of a challenging relationship. It’s totally understandable you would be feeling unhappy and lonely. I think with time it will gradually become easier.
There may be some community activities you might be able to join, if there is something that you feel drawn to. I’ve found I’ve had to use my intuition about what feels right and what doesn’t. I started doing some volunteer work at a council run service, only a small amount a week, but the people there are lovely and that has helped me feel more part of something and connected to people.
It’s important to know too that connections can extend beyond your immediate town and there are online communities such as this one. I hope you feel safe and supported here and know there is a community of caring people. There’s some lighted-hearted threads over in the BB Social section if you want to engage in less serious conversations, and ones like this one where you can share your struggles.
I don’t know what the surrounding area is like where you live, but one thing that’s greatly helped me in my new home has been visiting surrounding nature places. I’ve found this very healing. This may or may not be your thing, but just mentioning it in case it gives you another form of connection. I’ve rekindled my interest in photography and go out and photograph wildlife, nature and landscapes. It acts exactly like an antidepressant for me. There might be creative groups in your town of some kind.
Sending support and feel free to post any time. Take care,
ER
