Dear Nivaessa~
I've read your other post and quite understand that even with medication your depression and anxiety is present, and can become worse due to the person you are caring for having down times too.
I guess the first thing to say is you are not alone and the second is to ask, if I may, if you are undergoing specialist therapy as well as meds? My illness (PTSD, depression ,anxiety) came abut though quite a different cause however has responded to these over time and I'm now in a much better place
Long term injury, which is what has happened to you on so many levels means there are many things involving possible guilt, powerlessness, being alone, fear ... and all the rest. Even knowing what things should be like is just about impossible.
It takes skill, knowledge and experience in a psyicatrist, or other medical professional, to help deal with these. Perhaps the most important things is forming a realtionship with the therapist where you can feel secure. This I beleive is what has allowed everything else to happen, my confidence in them, their ability in return to see if they are being effective.
I know being a carer takes up all one's life, it is not something that can be done without support, and without time and reward for yourself. Do you mind sayng if you have support? Family or friends who you can talk honestly with who care and will try to help?
My wife had to look after me when I was at my worst, as well as work, run the household and look after the offspring. If it was not for her mum being on hand and a constant source of encouragement and strength I doubt she could have kept going.
You mentioned court. Many people blame themselves or feel they have a lack of courage by not going to court. In fact the chances of a successful prosecution with a custodial sentence are minute in every state or territory, and the experience can be as harrowing and damaging as the original event. Sadly the court process does not lend itself to such situations. One has to be particularly robust and unusually strong to survive a prosecution, and even then conviction is not guaranteed
An alternative is to work to the system to change, something with the potential to do more good than just one case. You might consider joining an organization that lobbies for legal reform on the matter of sexual abuse.
I'm presuming you are well beyond your 20's now. Would you like to as a little more abut your life?
Plus what has helped, what has not?
Croix
