My mum knew- and did nothing. *Trigger Warning: Child Abuse*

[Sia1]

When I was roughly 8-9 years old, my grandfather was over at our house all the time. My parents left me alone with him- not knowing what a nutcase the man was. I was continuously molested throughout my childhood. It would happen every time he was over. I told mum and she believed me, but she wouldn't tell me dad (as it was HIS dad molesting me).

I grew up in an abusive home, my mum was too scared to tell- and so I suppose I suffered for it? Eventually she tried to keep me away from him, I was little and I didn't quite understand just how serious the situation was. It didnt work. It kept happening. I am now 27 years old, and the older I get, the angrier and sadder I get. I grew up being too exposed to sex and sexual encounters- we lived in a house that was NOT sound proof.

As an adult, I am now disgusted at anything to do with sex. I get flash blacks of my childhood- of times when I was inappropriately touched, physically assaulted by my mother, and yelled and screamed at by my dad. I cant help but be angry with them, even at my age. I am so saddened by my family's behaviour towards me. I dont know how to deal with this, I've been hurt for many years and have not known where to go or who to talk to

[Kombie390]

Hi Sia1, I'm terribly sorry to read about what you went through I also was betrayed by my mother as she walked into 1 of my brothers rooms & caught us having sex she turned around & walked out & shut the door. I told my dad that evening when he got home from work so my mum couldn't lie to protect her son & he did nothing either. So I believe we have a right to be angry at them, our parents or other family members who raise us have an onus to protect us I get when some individuals might say if they were also an abuse victim it's in some way imprinted in their minds that behaviour becomes some what normalised & we are just another generation within a family to loose our childhood.

I can't offer much in terms healing & moving past it as I have bottled up my childhood & teenage years for over 30+ years. As much as I have relived moments or an entire situation & woken up from nightmares all these emotions are very raw I have found a therapist who I hope will be the 1 but we all know this is not a perfect world, 1 fact or piece of advice I can offer bottling up everything you are feeling hurt, anger etc will eat you from the outside in, it'll make you sick. My husband knows absolutely nothing about my sexual abuse from all 3 of my older brothers nor my teenage years. All I can say is be kind to yourself & take care

[Vero]

Sia1, sorry to hear this happened to you so relatively not that long ago. You were quick in confronting the experience. It took me into my late 30s to start doing something about it. And then I did now what is happening to me and stumbled on many therapists who were almost helpful. I’m now in 50s and my recovery accelerated with the current psych. I have interviewed 3 psych recommended by GP over the phone with my preamble explaining reasons of compatibility, comfort, trust I saw necessary. I had some 3-4 questions and the answers were important but also the way therapists felt about answering and how they answered. My story is similar to yours and I benefited from the work with this selected therapist who helped me express anger, hold hope, rationalise uncomprehencible, learn how to relate to myself with dignity and is there when I need her. Take care

[eagle72]

hi Sia1

i am a mum of an abused girl. she was two and i was giving birth to my son when she told me. hence, the pain and blame i feel for leaving her to give birth.

we went to court....he got supervised visits....and now she is 14yrs old and ......lives with him.

when i read your words and others....i learn the pain from my girls eyes not mine...

she does blame me for not stopping him.....she hates me now...and i want you to know how much it hurts us mums and how the courts let us down.

if the courts had done their job my daughter would of been protected and she would still be with me.

obviously her father manipulated her mind.

i suffer in silence now....it hurts me everyday that he took my girls body....and now controls her..

i am so sorry your mum didnt do what was required...

the courts however do not do the right thing eithor.

i feel your pain and hope you learn to smile and trust again.