Just being diagnosed with PTSD

[Crikey01]

Hi first time here and bit nervous. I've been an absolute mess for couple months and couldnt understand what was wrong with me and that in it self drive my sanity spiraling. I conjured every disease and felt the symptoms and was so frightening. My dad died from taking a medication 18 yrs ago by his doctor who was his golfing buddy and since then I've not been able to take anything new for fear of dying, and I was also misdiagnosed 10 yrs ago for benign intracranial hypertension which also impacted me greatly . My son has just come out the other side of a super depression and was on suicide watch. Thankfully he is on the mend and a month after is when I went into a spiral of absolute sadness and fear . For all the above trauma reared its head but wasnt aware it could happen Was so scary I didnt know what was happening to me and has taken awhile to work through but I feel immense relief I have a reason for feeling crazy . I'm not sure if others have felt relief when told that's what it is . My body is so exhausted I can hardly get the energy to get up . I was prescribed medication yesterday to ease my constant anxiety and panic but with my pill phobia its petrifying . Read to many forums . I suppose I'm just hoping now I have a diagnosis I can understand why Ivd been like I have . I've started a new psychologist today so as it's new I cant predict the outcome but not keen on taking new medications for fear of side affects. I'm not discussing medications as I know everyone is different and no one can really compare I suppose I'm looking for assurance . Thanks for reading . I'm praying for a calmer day tomorrow 😍

[PamelaR]

Hi Crikey and welcome to our community forums

Life sounds so immensely difficult at the moment. Being afraid to take the medication that will help your anxiety and panic attacks doesn't help does it? I'm assuming you talked to your doctor about this when it was prescribed for you?

I've found that doing many different things has helped my anxiety, i.e -

• taking prescribed medication
• grounding, mindfulness, breathing (slow and controlled)
• living a healthy lifestyle - eating well, exercising, limiting alcohol, socialising
• journaling - write in a journal on a daily basis

These have helped overtime. It doesn't happen immediately and it takes ongoing management. Life on the otherside is so much worth the effort.

Working through phobias is difficult and my thoughts are to talk it through with your new psychologist. My technique for managing my phobias, e.g. fear of heights has been to desensitise myself. I have put myself in situations that cause my fear to rise and I have challenged it. Now, I am able to stand on a glass bottom carriage over the Blue Mountains, go swinging in an enclosed cage across a 3km gorge at 180km an hour.

Not sure any of this helps. You're not alone Crikey. Keep reaching out if and when you want to.

Kind regards

PamelaR

[Wraith]

Gday Crikey

PTSD doesn't discriminate it can raise its head anywhere and for any reason, mine is from a workplace accident nearly 7 years ago that is still unresolved, and tomorrow I go in for my 23 surgery, this 1ns to eliminate the pain, Im having an implant to disrupt the nerve pain, after so many and the fact the hospital gave me golden staph, I rattle from pills when I walk, constant blood taking to measure renal function because after all we can cure you but the medication may screw your kidneys . So I get your medical reluctance to, the depression not understanding WHY you feel the way you do. The worry that others may look at you differently, or even whisper behind your back, about how mad you are. Even your own family might tell you they understand but you know they dont. I have come to realize that the only person that can judge you is you, no one else has the right to put you in a place you dont want to be, my psychiatrist tells me most of my anxiety comes from the unresolved legal battle, that my depression comes from not being the capable MAN i should be, my psychologist tells me my anal behavior is in an effort to preserve my sanity, they are people with experience and have seen similar cases like yours and mine, so they draw from that. But ultimately only you can pull yourself together, and being here being able to put into words how you feel is very cathartic, I know its why I am here.

So good luck, talk it out, tell us what your feeling, the forums are here for you to vent.

So vent, let it out.

It cant hurt but it can help.

Cheers

[Idkme]

Hi Crikey,

Yep, I had that feeling of relief... to know you aren't 'actually' going crazy and that the diagnosis 'sits well with you'. When I read the symptoms of Complex PTSD I felt like someone had been stalking me and wrote down all the things I felt... it was so strange and yet strangely invigorating also...

However... I do have to warn you... I unfortunately became so 'triggered' by my revelation that I couldn't STOP thinking about it... it obsessed my thoughts and functions (still does a bit). The best advice I can say is find a psychologist you can be COMPLETELY open and frank with. Build a relationship with them... if they don't feel right after a couple of visits then change. There are plenty out there. But talking about your issues can help make you more aware of the feelings you are experiencing and start to piece back the tiny bits of your fragmented life.

I hope you can find some help moving forward with your challenges. You've made all the right steps forward so far. Keep in touch here with updates on your progress... it's a long journey but the ride is worth it.