Family Cancer

[DaffyDuck]

A recap of the past few years: 

- Mum was diagnosed with stage 3 lymphoma. 

- Grandma was diagnosed with lymphoma. 

- Grandpa was diagnosed with bowel cancer and skin cancer. 

- Mums uncle was diagnosed with bowel and oesophagus cancer and passed. 

- My great uncle is starting chemo.

- My cousin woke up paralysed from the shoulders down and spent 3/4 of the year in hospital.

It feels like 2-3 years of hell.. the consistent diagnosis. The hospital trips. The waiting for medical tests. Not knowing the outcome.. 

I am exhausted.. whenever things settle something else seems to happen. When I think we are finally safe and everything is okay it isn't.. so I can't relax. I am getting angry over every little thing at the moment. 

I hate feeling tired all the time.. and/or angry over dumb things. I don't know what to do any more. 

I have seen a counsellor in the past but it's hard to keep going when I feel like I don't always have something to talk about.

[Bob_22]

Hi DaffyDuck,

Thanks for your post. I am sorry to hear about everything your family is going through and you all have my thoughts and prayers. It is totally understandable to feel burnt out and irritated over any tiny mishap. It is a common sign of grief in my experience. Generally I found it goes away with time.

It's okay if you don't feel like sharing alot with a counsellor. It is not for everyone. It took a while for me to open up with my psychologist but I generally just like having someone to go to just in case I needed to get something off my chest (though it rarely happened). If you want you can always try counselling through the cancer council and I believe they have an online community as well here: https://www.cancercouncil.com.au/get-support/cancer-counselling/ 

In the meantime, do your best to focus and take care of yourself. The xmas and new years period can be stressful so try to have some time for yourself. 🙂

Bob

[Fern42]

Hi DaffyDuck,

I really want to acknowledge how much you have been through the past few years, I understand that it would have been tremendously difficult to deal with all this. It is understandable that you are feeling tired, exhausted and even in fight or flight mode given your feelings of not being able to relax. 

Is there anything you like doing that gives you enjoyment? example. Whether that is listening to your favourite artist, or reading a book? I know that you cannot change these environmental stressors that is going on for you,  but sometimes taking some time to yourself to really be just with yourself whether that is sitting in a silent room and listening to your favourite song or reading a book to take your mind off your stressors can shift your mood and your thoughts from what's going on. I know you may not always feel like doing this or be in a position too but even 5 minutes before you go to bed. Do your best to try and focus on yourself too. 

Take care