Married 8 years, young when we married (22) & early on in our relationship he would drink a lot & often get angry with me, be verbally abusive telling me he hated me & regretted marrying me (often done in front of friends and/or family) & walk out and be missing for 18+hrs & returning home and expecting everything to be fine. I would tell him how is actions hurt me & he would make it out like it was my fault in the first place or totally shut me down and belittle me for feeling that way, like I had no right. This stopped & he rarely drinks now & we've been doing very well and for the most part been really happy.
He is very focused on saving and getting setup for life, hoping to retire before 50 (this is a target we've agreed on together). I went away for the weekend with a girl friend of mine, a trip we make evey year, before leaving we had spoken about the use of our joint account for spending with me stating any money taken from savings would be repaid, on my return he was very distant & the next day he told me he was unhappy with how much money I had spent & that he felt like I had betrayed him & I might as well have cheated on him. He then told me he had already packed a bag & was leaving me to go to a hotel as he didn't want to be around me and was no longer sure if he wanted to be with me anymore. A few days later I asked him to come home so we could talk, he told me I could have 1 hour of his time. When he arrived I told him I thought the whole thing was an overreaction as I'd said all money would be returned & I couldn't understand why he left. I asked him to stay & let me repay the money, he told me he didn't trust me & didn't know what he wanted, and left.We barely spoke over the next few days & I spent the next week coming to terms with the fact he had left me. I returned to work the following week.I returned home from work that evening to find him sitting in our living room like nothing happened. I was really angry. He had put his motorcycle away in the garage to hide the fact he was home and was expecting me to be pleased with his little 'surprise' homecoming. I told him how much walking out on me again had hurt me and he basically told me it was all my fault and I deserved it, and that I had no right to be angry at him. I spoke to my mum via Skype when he left and she advised me to get out, he has over the years been mentally and emotionally abusive (never physically), my mum is a medical professional and thinks he possibly has Asperger's.
