Hey meekamoo,
I'm a little bit concerned after reading your post. I understand that when you get really angry, and hurt, it can be really hard to control your emotions, but physically hurting each other should be avoided. Typically what can happen in these situations is that it will start with something small, something relatively "harmless", but over time, this pattern of behaviour can snowball and turn into something worse.
Year 12 can be a really stressful time, so I can just imagine how stressed you both are, but there are better ways to deal with the pressure than to fight with each other. You say that he might not realize that what he's saying is hurtful, it might be a good idea to sit down and have a conversation with him and try to explain that. Usually schools have counsellors, so it might also be worth having a chat to them, or for the both of you to see them together if that is possible. It might help to open up a healthy conversation.
In any case, it's a good idea to check out 1800RESPECT, specifically their page on Healthy Relationships. The page provides some information on what a healthy relationship might look like, and may be helpful for you to consider where to go next. They also offer phone counselling and online chats, so this is also a good option.
In the mean time, if you're feeling stressed out, some things that you can do to manage the stress include:
- Exercise: this is a big one, it can release pent up energy and help both of you de-stress
- Spend some time doing things that you enjoy: sometimes you need a mental break, from school, and from other people. Finding something you enjoy doing, and taking time for yourself is really important.
- Mindfulness: Something that I've learnt recently is that when we "multitask" we're actually switching our attention constantly, which can be even more exhausting than completing one task at a time. Practicing some mindfulness can help reduce exhaustion and perhaps help with emotional regulation
LT.
