Yes Grandy has some good advice, oh how far she has excelled!
I'm often amused by anniversaries - not being sarcastic, you know me that well Elizabeth.
Anniversaries are a man made thing. Before time was measured man treated anniversaries as just another day. It is purely a point at which the earth is positioned to the sun. And the time of day, where, the spinning earth is positioned to the sun. If the time zone wasnt just east of New Zealand, another man made factor, then the anniversary time would be different.
As an example, my old school friend lost her dad as a child. It was before daylight saving was introduced. Every year on the anniversary of his passing and the time of his passing (3 pm) she'd grieve heavily. But after daylight saving her anniversary was actually one hour out.
This example is to display that anniversaries are in our minds and less relevant than reality. If you adopt that view then anniversaries become less traumatic.
In my case, my fathers day of passing is never remembered. My grieving days are purely based on when I feel that grief coming on, anytime, any day.
So, I worry about your attachment to this anniversary. I dont blame you for feeling the trauma as I was only one hour from those fires and have fought fires for the country brigade, but you might be inadvertently adding to your trauma.
I hope I made some sense.
TonyWK
