Hi everyone!

[TunaMayo]

Hello all,

I have seen a few forum posts throughout the year and I feel like it's time for me to make an account to ask advice for my anxiety/depression and hopefully help others.

Some background on myself:

- I suffer from anxiety and depression

- I was suicidal at the end of 2016 (despite nothing major happening in my life) and ended up seeing a psychologist from a GP reference. I started taking anti-depressants and I was sceptical at first but it actually worked.

- After taking anti-depressants on an ongoing basis, I found a job while being a student. It was great.

- Was able to get rid of my driving phobia. It was a harsh journey of being behind the wheel, sweating and shaking with lots of worries in my mind but I managed to pull through with lots of practice. Now I can drive anywhere!

Not everything was positive though, I had a few issues and some that will never be solved:

- My parents doesn't understand what depression is, even after explaining it to them in their native language. It has been 2 years since I've been to the psychologist and they still don't understand.

- Months later after I coming off anti-depressants, I felt it was back again. I took anti-depressants again which made me realise that I can't live my life without it and I am somewhat doomed to be stuck with depression for the rest of my life.

- I am Asexual, I would like to have friends without romantic feelings involved - which I then try minimise human interaction and distance myself. I end up feeling lonely but it is for the sake of them to not develop any feelings towards me which would highly likely break our friendship. In addition, I'm an introvert. I'll probably have near to no friends at this rate.

I'll be lurking around these forums and posting time to time.

I hope we get along!

[Croix]

Dear TunaMayo~

Welcome here to the Forum, as you have already been reading in here I guess you realize there are a lot of people that can relate to your story.

Actually there are a fair few things you say that sound pretty encouraging. To live with suicidal thoughts is no small thing. The fact you had the courage to seek help would not have been easy. A/D's that work are a blessing, and your telling of getting a job while you study, feeling better and overcoming driving hassles is all really good.

I hope now that you are back on them they are working as well as before. Depression is an illness like any other - diabetes for example. If you need to take meds permanently that is no big thing. I have to, many others do too. Going off when feeling good for a while can be a real trap (tell me about it:)

Parents are parents, and some simply cannot understand. You mention that they are from overseas, do you think there is any cultural barrier to their understanding? Some cultures simply do not accept mental illness as an acceptable matter. Do you have anyone in your family who you can talk to who cares and understands?

As for being asexual, can I ask how you know? That might seem a silly question however you have been under the influence of a pretty taxing life. Plus depression -and some meds - can really suppress all desire for intimacy. I was that way. Over a long period things changed as my illness came under control.

I would think being reserved under the circumstances is quite understandable, though there is such a thing as simple friendship.

I do hope you come back and talk more

Croix

[james1]

Hello TunaMayo,

Welcome to the forums. It is nice to meet you and I hope we can talk some more in the future.

Good job on working through your driving phobia. It sounds like you've got a lot of determination to get through that. And getting through a serious case of depression and suicidal thoughts by speaking up is a huge achievement too.

I also was suicidal about 2 to 3 years ago, but speaking with a psychologist who I still see has been so beneficial to my life. Like you, my parents just don't really get it. Mum has laid off me since I ended up in hospital, but she still is very insensitive about these things. She understands English, but it's just not in our culture to, I suppose, prioritise mental health.

Just on the antidepressants, I think it can take a while to come off them but certainly we aren't stuck forever. My own opinion is that people aren't just depressed people. I think we can be more prone to depression or just more emotional about things, and perhaps we can even just be more sad than others, but with tools and support, I think we can eventually learn to deal with things without needing anti depressants. Or at least I hope so anyway.

James