Struggling to go on

[Tess2]

Life is being really hard for me and troubles keep compounding. I cannot face wading through what is needed to move forward I feel isolated and alone. I have people who care but I think they can be overloaded with my despair and it can be a burden. There seem to be obstacles all along the way.

Two years ago I lost my job. A career of 50 years. I am 66 and have no partner. I have not coped well with this loss and now have significant financial problems too. I have to sell my home. Pay off my mortgage and buy a new place. I live with my son who is very caring but I have suppported him financially and emotionally through the family court. His ex is trying to remove him from his daughters life. I feel I have reached my retirement years with very little and no joy. Depression has been a big part of my life. But I have managed. Now I also have severe anxiety. It paralyses me. And panic attacks. I don’t know how to do each day.

[Tess2]

Dear lee, thank you for your message I appreciate you thinking of me. I do intend to look for some work but I am struggling with the energy required. I find Monday’s very hard for some reason and am struggling with it today

tess

[Lee lee 73]

Hello Tess,

Hope you're going ok. How has your week been? In response to you saying it sucks getting old, I forgot to say - my clients continuously tell me to not get old....

Maybe try to plan to do something different on a Monday? ? Just thinking out loud dear friend. It may help for an hour or so....

Thinking of you

Lee

[Tess2]

Dear Lee,

thank you for your post. I have not had a good week for some reason, a few things went wrong and I don’t deal so well any more. I feel a bit better today. Yes, I have to do something about mondays. I am going to fix up my cv this week and look for some work. That will be a big effort for me.

How are you travelling? I think of you so often, but have not been posting

tess

[Lee lee 73]

Hello dear Tess,

It's a relief knowing you had a better day today dear friend . I'm hoping that, with whatever went wrong, you are able to put behind you?? It sounds like you have. Good on you for wanting to update your cv Tess. It's a step forward.

I'm going pretty good at the moment thank you Tess.....and I'm making the most of it!!!

Thinking of you often too dear friend. Please be kind to yourself. Remember, you can always write here with whatever is troubling you. I. ..and we, are always here to listen if needed.

Love Lee

[Lee lee 73]

Hello Tess,

Are you going ok?

Lee

[Tess2]

Hi lee,

thanks for the contact, I know I have been very quiet on here lately. I am ok thank you. I have been a bit up and down . But I have been following you and Grandy to see how you both are. You seem to have been feeling better lately I am really pleased. And on line dating, good for you. I am too cowardly for that. I also have no inclination for a relationship.

the weather has turned a bit milder here the last couple of days. It is a pleasant change. I like autumn, but do not look forward to winter at all.

i hope you are ok and taking care of yourself

tess

[Lee lee 73]

Hello Tess,

Glad you are going ok. Being up and down is hard and can also be tricky, but at least there are less downs.

You take good care too Tess.

Lee

[Tess2]

Hi

i am feeling really really low. So sad and down, hyper anxious and just don’t think I can go on like this. Life overwhelms me, there seems to be no meaning left in anything. I do try so hard to make a go of things, but it is such a struggle.

i want to feel joy again

tess

[Ggrand]

Dear Tess,

Im really sorry that your struggling so much..

Hang in there hun...Hopefully this will pass soon,

your stronger then you think you are try to believe that this will pass...Believing is the first step to getting through hard times..I’m here for you holding you tight with my hands, I’ll not let you go..

You have a beautiful sister and a lovely son, these are two good reasons, plus their us here on BB..more reasons to continue to try to go on..You have many people that care so much for you here...Please hun keep trying..

I can relate to life overwhelming you..it does me as well, but we must keep trying and then try some more.. I believe that life can be beautiful, we have to keep looking...Some days I can see the beautiful things in life and other times I see darkness only, but the day here or their that the beauty come into our life is so much worth it...

Tess..cry if you need to cry, It releases the hurt in our hearts as well as toxins..it’s a release..my shoulder is always here for you to cry on, while my arms are gently holding you tightly...

Breathe dear Tess..concerntrate on your breathing to get through your high anxiety, maybe light some scented candles and watch the little flames dancing in the breeze, You need to try to bring you back to the here and now..Sitting in the sun, letting the suns healing warm into your skin...listening to the birds chattering away, watch the clouds float gentle across the sky..just something to try to take your mind away from negatives and back into positives and the here and now...Please try dear friend...

Sitting with you, Tess..

Sending you some love and caring hugs dear friend...💜🤗.

Grandy..

[Tess2]

Thank you dear Grandy,

your words and advice mean a lot to me. My son and I had a terrible row yesterday and he really lost his temper. He hurt himself, not there is all that to set right. I am so sad. But I do have a beautiful candle and I will burn that and try to think of some way to distract myself.

I know I have not posted on yours much lately, but I follow you and know that you are struggling with things. It has just also occurred to me that yesterday was the 23 anniversary of my husband death, I always feel crap at this time of the year.

It is selfish, but I know that he would fix things for me if he could. I miss him.

tess