My story- just keep moving

[1113]

My depression started 20 odd years ago. So many bad things have happened in my life that remembering them is not something that I am able to cope with at the best of times. Some of these things have caused depression, some of them because of depression. It also hits me hard for no reason when all is going well. Its the major depressive episodes when I become to ill to cope, its like my soul/ existence leaves completely. Anxiety goes hand in hand with depression, and my anxiety is matching the level of my depression, just going outside is a painful experience. High level anxiety can last for days on end. Negative thoughts impact my everything, fleeting, unrealistic/uncontrollable. I forget who I am, where I put things/day it is. I don't think that I am good enough. This is not true, I know that from past experience. It effects every part of my life, family, friends, work. Most people don't understand why.

Why can't I have fun? When will I be normal? Why is this? Questions sometimes cause more problems and all I can do is take every day one step at a time until the major depression passes (its been 3 months already) or until the medication settles. Medication changes for me have side effects which can escalate other present symptoms. Mental health is so important. Don't hide it, with every ounce of your being tell someone. Get help. Reach out. Except. Go against what you feel. You are worth it.

I hid myself from society for many years because I felt that nobody understood. This was a mixture of anxiety and my naturally reclusive mentality that depression moulded me into. Its extremely difficult for me to decipher at times with all the chatter of negative thoughts what is reality or not. I never let anyone close to me so that I'm not a burden on them and I'm untrusting to others because of the fear of being hurt. People have a natural ability to push away the weird and undesired. So this makes it easier to do but not right.

All these symptoms mashed together make psychosis and inevitable agrophobia. Luckily this only effects me for a few weeks but the time it takes to recover from that to being able is far longer.

Its time for me to be me again. Clarity is still far away but there is always a light at the end of the tunnel, you just have to keep moving.

[1113]

Ps

It takes my brain awhile for stuff to sink in. I appreciate the references to utube. I just need to catch up.

Hug a dog, doesn't matter who's

Peace

Six

[SourceShield]

Morning bro!

You're so onto it!

LOVE the idea of looking for 'patterns' in the written word as well.

Just as we can 'see' a person in their non-verbal communication/body-language...looking at the way a person expresses with the written work, and identifying algorithms...could be one way that we could track the psychopath etc.

Good work, brother!

You are a genius...but I already told you that!

And, remember there is no rush and this is not a competition - I am just gonna keep on referring other teachers and resources for you to look up, but you take your time, and just feel it out...eventually the right and best teachers and resources will come to you, and itll feel right.

Did you see that I also replied to your - Whats Cooking Good Looking, thread?

Take a look at what I wrote, and get back to me...when you can, okay?.

HWJT

1) Clean my room

2) SNORT

3) Pray, or-more-so...connect with the more wiser and intelligent part of self...more meta-physics for ya!

4) Studies - Continuing to look at the above topics, as mentioned (Psychopathy and Path-liars)

5) Walk Bundy

6) Eat Well

7) Meet up with me friend...wink wink nudge nudge...

😎 Reach out on BB, whenever and wherever I can - as we become healthier, reaching out becomes part of our over holistic health plan!

And, when your mind has woken up...lets discuss some of the things that I have written about - Healthy debate is good brain-exercise!

Glad you slept well...me too, and Im feeling good!

MuchLove my bro.

[1113]

Bro,

Metaphysical is awesome....because it's real but actually not at the same time.....sweet!

I'm a bit tired today, not in debating mood dude.

This focusing on the real world is hard work.

Genius.....your inflating my ego........cheers bro.

I did everything on my hwjt the best I could, so that is awesome.

When I've got me down pat, then I'll reach out and help too.

I'm switching threads to see your response.

Today is real

Tomorrow is real

Yesterday is in the past

Six

[SourceShield]

Bro,

All g.

But for those of us that fully understand and accept metaphysics...it is the only thing that is 100% real.

Take your time.

HaveFun

[SourceShield]

p.s.

Much study has actually gone into and has proven that reaching out and helping others...is not just good for the benefactor, but also the giver!

The act of kindness, which is what we are talking about here...heals all.

And thats now hard-science.

Reaching-out helps us to put our own issues into perspective and wisdom, clarity and courage is granted to the one that is reaching out...its a win/win.

There is no rush, take your time on this one, but just know that being a generous spirit...dissolves much of your woes!

“There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up.”
― John Holmes

[1113]

Brozza,

Makin up names again.

I enjoy helping others, I have a generous spirit.

I just can't seem to find that part of me atm.

I'm going to add that to hwjt. Maybe it doesn't always need to be on BB either, I could volunteer for something. Mulling that one over.

Like you said take my time. But on that note...I've noticed you haven't reported on your hwjt today

[SourceShield]

Patience young grasshopper!

Thats your new nickname!

Thats because some things on the list are still in process...

Of course it doesnt have to be on BB - the point is to just do it, but be honest about it!

Once it gets a bit darker...will take BDogg for his walk.

And, am meeting up with me new friend at around 9pm.

Aside from that...HWJT for today, is all sussed.

Peace

[SourceShield]

p.s.

Though its true that there is no rush...we must also remember that tomorrow never comes!

Its all about harmonious-balance.

Dont put off for tomorrow, what you can do now.

Im really doing my best to minimize procrastination.

My aspirations deserve to come to their ultimate expression and fruition.

[1113]

Bahahahahaha grasshopper.......another one to catch with chop sticks.

So weird...bugs are important now that we have a new lizard as a pet. Today I've been catching bugs for food.

Oh and your metaphysical messing with me. Love it.

Going to clean up a bit and get my boy off to bed.

Have a good one brozza

Grasshopper out.

[SourceShield]

Night Grasshopper!

Heres one for ya...metaphysics is the one and true 'thing' that can clear our 'messy' heads!.

Understanding ones place in the wholeness of All-That-Exists, allows us to understand that there is NOTHING wrong with us at all.

For all that exists is perfect, in its imperfect way.

Without the bugs, the lizard would have no food.

And yet, we are taking one life to give to another.

This is the way of life and death - for there really is no such thing.

Chaos and order must exist for the other to occur.

In truth, there is no such thing as depression...we have just believed it into being so!

Release the limiting belief...and life becomes limitless.

We can now see this on a sub-atomic level...our feeling-thought processes can alter our genetics!

In other words...happy and healthy thoughts heal!.

Thats science now...not just hocus-pocus.

Life mastery is the mission.

The metaphysical and physical are one and the same.

Sleep well brother.

You are on the right path...we all are.

We just have to believe that for ourselves!

Peace&Kindness