I can't find the right place for me to post

[Moonstruck]

I don't know any more where to put a new thread if I make one, or which ones to join in. I always used Anxiety because that is my major condition but that has been relatively under control lately - I feel Depressed today - but I don't qualify for the topics there either. I'm depressed mainly because there doesn't seem a place for me. I love some of the threads and personal thoughts for example in Staying Well, but I can't join in there, because I don't have any tips for Staying Well.

I tend to have almost paranoid thoughts through over-thinking "problems" that I would like to talk over but don't know where to talk them over before they reach the paranoid stage...I want to avoid that. I join in the Social threads saying light hearted jokey things because thats the only place I seem to belong.

I dwell on any problems my adult sons have in various aspects of their life and want to "fix things for them" - our relationship is very loving and close though - they are wonderful to me - so there is no real "problem" with my relationship with them....so I don't seem to belong in the "relationships, family" section either do I?

I worry about them all the time - when I tried to express this on forum I think it was misconstrued that I had "empty nest syndrome" - trying to adapt to my sons' leaving home....No, that's not it...they've been gone for years and years...I am a grandmother.

I liked the Getting to Know You, or is it Me? thread very much - but have been given suggestions how to start my own thread and what section to use etc and get the feeling I'm being steered away from there too.

So I am still confused. I don't feel particularly anxious today, so this shouldn't even be in Anxiety! Do you see my dilemma?

In fact the more I write the more I feel like crying - I don't know where to go next.

[Moonstruck]

Dear Croix.....perhaps you missed your career calling...perhaps a professional counsellor would be ideal for you....I invariably call on you when facing another "travelling" challenge although others' advice and help has been comforting and reassuring too....yes you guessed it. another trip!  Its one occasion I really don/t want to miss, neither does my son who has a milestone birthday in about 6 weeks and its interstate....he is having a big celebration there and really wants me there.  I can't fly direct to his capital city, fly to my state capital and get connect flight etc....no big deal?  His celebration is in an outer suburb..and I wake every morning in a terrible state saying "You can always say No, you've been in too much pain, you are too old to travel, its too involved for my brain to sort out". I am a wreck until I get up and into the day , begin to think logically.  I will talk to his brother tonight who when we last spoke was considering doing a road trip with his son to the party...he lives a lot closer than me.....whether we can co=ordinate our movements and stay at the same accommodation seems like too much of a challenge......then of course I have dates to work out for care of my cat and the list goes on...it all seems too much, but will I regret not going to this as it seems very important to my son who I rarely get to see anyway!    (as I could have predicted, the pain seems to have subsided a bit since this has taken over my stupid but ruthless mind!!).....thanks for listening once again!  Love Moon S

[Croix]

Dear Moon~

Of course you must go, one of the big mistakes in life is missed opportunities and this sounds something were you are wanted, and want to go yourself. So it may be the travel is a little more complicated than a direct flight, however yo have handled planes and trains in the past, now is now different. Remember they really want you  and will try to help with the travel where they can.

True the cat might not be delighted to be separated from you, but htat makes it all the more pleasurable when you get back together again.

I'm glad the pain seem better, it will be even more distant when you are surrounded by the ones you love

"To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all."

Croix

[Moonstruck]

Dear Croix...think I have completed all travel bookings. Still unsure how to get from A to B in Sydney but will work it out with sons in coming weeks.  Feel drained and we are in middle of very long and intense heatwave with unbearable humidity, everyone lethargic and just "not feeling good" I am probably dehydrated. Temperatures this high do occur here but only on odd days with some reprieve...this is day after day with no relief in sight.

Won an award for being the best bowler....couldn't even get very excited, what's wrong with me? Everything has been happening one after the other these past weeks..medical appts changed, screen door lock broken, can't lock it, booked Cat into Motel, family birthday gifts to be bought and posted, all going on alongside the over-thinking my travel plans.  How will I walk around Sydney Airport if this pain has not improved? There seems fewer employees in uniform just walking around waiting to "help people" they are, like us, in a big hurry to get from A to B...its hard to find the right person to "help"...everything is "do it yourself". very hard for elderly folk, particularly if a bit disabled and slower than usual....see? See how I over-think everything?

Just wondered....why you seem the only person who ever answers me? My other friends on here used to have conversations with me but they don't seem to be around....you're all I have!

I look at that impressive Award and it seems odd that my name is on it. I can't imagine the nervous old woman I am today doing anything to win that!!  They must have made a mistake!...take care....Moon S

[Croix]

Dear Moon~

I travel by QANTAS and they provide free wheelchairs and movement and people movers (golf buggys) been terminals. It may be other airlines provide the same service, once I get to the QANTAS counter I have no more walking to attempt.

I also wear a sunflower lanyard to say I have a disability and airport staff know I need assistance. Your local airport may be able to post you a lanyard.

All this stuff is free.

Between at least some of that you should be OK.

Being given an award may not seem that exciting right at first, but becomes something to reflect on with satisfaction in the future, and why it should be funny your name is on it (unless you pinched it:) it is pretty obvious how much talent you have.

Which friends are you talkng about? Sometime people do step back for a bit due to their own hassles.

"I can believe anything provided it is quite incredible"

Croix

[CMF]

Dear Moon,

I'm still here. Sorry we haven't spoken for a while, I was off the forums for a bit. Congratulations on your award, a wonderful achievement. You seem to have alot on your plate at the moment. I haven't revelled on a plane for a very long time. Going to the airport makes me nervous, let alone flying. I hope you can find some assistance. Croix seems to have sound advice. 

Luv ya Moon 

CMF

[quirkywords]

Moon

i read the posts and answer when I can. I also have recurring problems  with my password. I write it dowb

[quirkywords]

Oops sent too early. So I have many techno problems that mean I am off line for ages and it is frustrating..

[Moonstruck]

I am trying a new neuro linguistic clinic (I think that's what its called) re some hypnotherapy type work on this pain as I am pretty sure a lot of it is caused by the messages from my brain....the wrong messages.....

[CMF]

I hope it works for you Moon.

I'm interested to hear how it goes.

[Croix]

Dear Moon, wiht a wave to CMF~

I'm glad you are trying various approaches to the pain, I'd have to echo CMF and say I'm interested in the outcome to

I've tried acupuncture which  punctured my wallet and did nothing else.

Have a more gloomy quote  from you know who:

Sympathy with joy intensifies the sum of sympathy in the world, sympathy with pain does not really diminish the amount of pain.

Croix