FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Alone..Depressed..Sad..

Ggrand
Community Champion
Community Champion
Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..
5,671 Replies 5,671

demonblaster
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi beautiful Grandy love 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 And everyone

 

I thought you’d get on well with them sweetly which isn’t the issue I was thinking but glad you do. 

I do understand how you’d be feeling and yes it comes back on you which isn’t fair esp that you’re saying what needs to be done. 

I love that you’re conscientious and do feel for you sweety.

I think they do sound like they expect an awful lot without much gratitude. Pfftt.  


I too wouldn’t at all like you to leave. It’s good for you being out and amongst others and a break from home Huns 🤗


That’ll be lovely having a party for Betty. Bet there’ll be some yums there too 🙄 😂 how cools that eye rolling emoji. Here’s some other neat ones 🤪😜🫥😶😵💫🥶

 

Dear love thank you for that beautiful visit at mine I’m getting there today. Always good being with you Grandz 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 

We had our 4th Covid jabs yesterday all ok I think just a bit sore at the site but ok. 

Dear sweet lady you’re always in my thoughts with unbreakable 💫 strongest love dearest friend you mean the world to me 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩💜🦋🦄🌈🌸

 

pubAok lysvm yAdimh sss be safe and we’ll my gorjy  🤗 huge deep love Grandy 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩💜🙋‍♀️😇

mmMekitty
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hello Grandy,

I've been reading the last two pages of posts here, & it occurs to me to ask, have you spoken to your boss about this problem? Have you spoken to your staff about how you are affected by their non-compliance with the instructions you are giving them, as per what the boss wants done?

Their refusal to follow instructions is putting you in a difficult position, between them & your boss.

mmMekitty

 

ecomama
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Good morning Grandy, lovely lady! 

 

How are you doing today? 

 

The birds are up EARLY and happily chirping away in the garden this morning. 
It's FREEZING cold though ughh. 

 

Hope you're doing okay. We all care deeply about you. 

 

Love EMxxxx

Ggrand
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hello Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩, Paws, Hanna, Quirky, ecomama, mmMeKitty, and all…🤗..

 

Thank you all for your caring posts.

 

No, I haven’t spoken to my boss about what’s going on at work…to me that’s like being a snitch…..They are all elderly women, been their longer then me….I just feel sad, that people donating their clothes and things to our charity…put their trust into the fact that their donations will go to the needy in and around this area….and not be thrown out or sold to overseas….It really is sad to see this go on….I told Betty to not keep coming to me and telling me what the girls out back are doing…..Betty works with me in the shop…but keeps going out the back to I think check what donations are out their….then tells me what she sees happening…..Last Monday, when she done this….I asked her to stop telling me….

 

I have been on an emotional roller coaster the past few weeks….yesterday was the point I broke down…I hit a pot hole that I couldn’t avoid…getting closer to the shopping town..my tyre went flat….The road I travel on is not a busy road… I went to try and change it, only to discover that I had no tools to do the job…plus the Jack was and still is stuck in its little hidey hole….I sat their for over an hour completely broken and in tears….realising I have no one I could ring to help me….after another hour or so the police came…they stopped to see if I was needing help…I wasn’t doing really good by now….after much refusal  from me…they called an ambulance…They took me to the hospital, only after the police promised they would organise for my car to be towed to the tyre place for repairs…I was given some calming meds…released a couple of hours later…my old support worker’s organisation called to take me home…

Today, I’m waiting for a phone call from the tyre place so I can pick up my car….I don’t have the money to pay for all this…towing, repairs and a new tyre…my car will probably stay their until I get my pension on Tuesday.

 

Am I doing okay?…emotionally not really…been through this emotional episode before and know it passes….wish it would hurry up and pass though….I need a lift back to the hospital today for a review of me….Thankfully I’m better then I was yesterday…I asked Betty…she is going to take me…

 

Kind thoughts, my love, care and hugs everyone..

Grandy..

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hanna3
Community Member

Hi Grandy

 

I'm only here briefly as I'm taking a break from all kinds of social media for a bit... i am sorry you had that experience with your car - have you thought about joining the NRMA, they provide free roadside assistance, it's honestly worth paying the membership for peace of mind when things like that happen!  I'm sorry you had such a fright but I'm glad the police helped you - and it's a lesson learnt the hard way!!!!  I guess you will have a towing fee and yes a new tyre... but at least you are home safe and the car will be OK.  Do look at joining the NRMA dear lady!!!  Take it easy and rest up for a couple of days now after that adventure!

 

Grandy have you ever googled what it's like to volunteer at Vinnies?  People say things like it helps with their loneliness, they enjoy chatting with the other staff and customers, they get work experience... a few people have mentioned it can be a challenge to work with people with a different work ethic.  

 

Can you take the attitude it's a place where you enjoy going, it's good for you, but everything has its challenges too - so working with people who are elderly, get distracted, don't maybe concentrate too well, or don't have your work ethic - is one of the challenges you have to learn to deal with?  Well done for telling that lady not to keep gossiping to you about what the others are doing!  So can you find a way to cope with the ladies not doing what you say in a way that is patient and understanding and doesn't get you so distressed?  They're not doing it as a personal attack on you - they're forgetful or chatting or confused or whatever.  Can you find a way to get less distressed about it all and enjoy your time there more?  It's soooo important for you to have that enjoyable social contact.  

 

Big hugs!!!!!  Rest up, and phone the NRMA about joining up!!!!  oxoooxoxo

Paw Prints
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hello Grandy,

 

Oh lass am I allowed to say how pleased I am that the policeman persisted in talking you into going in the ambulance... being so low I think you would have been struggling to even think of it as being helpful... 

I hope todays review went ok for you... 

 

Lass be gentle with yourself... give your furs a cuddle... reach out to the help lines or pop on here. You don't have to do this alone... we all care about you...

 

Love & gentle hugs

Paws

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hanna3
Community Member

Sending some caring thoughts your way Grandy. 💞🐕💖🐩💝💌🌷🌼🌻💐

ecomama
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Dear Grandy, I'm so sorry to hear of the ordeals you've gone through, hugs! 

Certainly makes the shop bs pale in comparison to being high and dry on a quiet road with a flat. 

 

I'm grateful the Police came and helped you. 
Perhaps phoning the tyre place and asking them to break the tyre Jack free from it's stuck spot will help in the next flat situation? 

 

I'm sorry, these are stressful times. 

 

Go you telling them you don't want to know what's going on out the back! 
Some things are OUTSIDE our control and once we realise this, the boundary can go UP and even if their behaviours irk us, we can get on with our lives, not knowing MORE of what irks us. 

Well done you Grandy. Hugs! 

 

Looks like you have a compulsory holiday at home for the next few days? 
Maybe we might see you in the BB Cafe?? 
We miss you! Not ONLY the food you bring but YOU! 

 

Love EM

 

 

mmMekitty
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Oh dear Grandy, what an ordeal. I'm relieved police came along & helped you.

I'm sorry, it's really getting late. Before I forget, I wanted to mention, services Australia/Centrlink might be able to advance or loan the money you need to pay these unexpected bills. It's like an interest free loan from SA/Centrelink. You would agree to have a small amount of your pension each fortnight taken out to pay back Services Australia/Centrelink for a while.

Of-course dealing with SA/Centrelink is usually no fun & takes a lot of time. You might be able to apply online, but then I'm guessing, you'd have to register & all that mucking about.

I must get up & go to bed, NOW my legs are saying. Hugzies? 

mmMekitty

mmMekitty
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hello Grandy,

How are you today?

You said you have told Betty to not tell you what the other women are doing out the back of the store. Just because you can avoid seeing or hearing what is happening does not stop it from continuing.

Where I used to work, that was one of the problems I had. Having heard & seen some things I could not pretend nothing was going on, even though I was in no position to do anything about it. My boss was the manager, who actively encouraged some of the things that happened, even getting me involved. Also, the people at the top of the organisation were unhelpful, doing some illegal stuff themselves. It was very convenient for many people to close their eyes & ears. The place was a mess.

When my feelings awoke, like a volcanic eruption, the work environment, the relationship with the people & how it all 'worked' was a constant conflict for me, one I had to resolve. It meant I left.

To support you, I can only hope that if Betty tells you nothing & you can forget what you already know, you can resolve the conflict & continue to work & have the social outlet you need.

I guess, it's just not what I would do now. I am not you, though, right?

❤️always.

mmMekitty