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Alone..Depressed..Sad..

Ggrand
Community Champion
Community Champion
Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..
5,647 Replies 5,647

demonblaster
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hey sweet Grandy 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 and all lovelies here and reading 🤚

 

Ahh darl you’re still having such a rough trot aren’t you. Poor love that’s quite a bill but yes as Pawsy said they are acts of a good person. I too liked Kitty and Croixy ideas as well. 

Grandy it’ll be really good when that’s done. May not be much comfort now but ahead you’ll have security with it not causing this grief again. 
You’re certainly due a good break hun eh. It’s wearing isn’t it and I imagine the stress has affected any chance of good nights sleep that adds to so much tension doesn’t it. I’m sorry you have so much going on. 

sweety these blokes have a job to do and it sounds so big. I’d think their focus will be to get it done so they’d be getting stuck in.

Grandy you really are stronger than you think dear friend.

Please lovey try to throw reason into the negative thoughts that provoke fear. We run only with the down thoughts. I’ve found in the past it helps a lot because it keeps our mind busy with problem solving and internal debate allowing more constructive thought rather than following the downs. We owe it to ourselves to stand up for ourselves. Internal bully has no place here. 

I too have been wondering and hoping that your arms are holding with pain levels. Geez it’s hard isn’t it you poor love. 

Always you’re in my thoughts darling friend. Please be as gentle as you can with yourself. Remember we’re all here for you. 
We’re there in spirit too always Grandy. 

Really love you sweet lady. Yes loving this place thanks hun. Not far drive from the beaches which we at times go to. I think of you then too, I know you love the beach. You’d love it here actually everyone would it’s really lovely. Very happy and with this beautiful dear love Mr Deebi 😍 he’s a darling man. 

Hope you’re all going well. I’m reading a few email notifications at times so not completely gone 🤗 Care very much about several people here. Tc 💗

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩💗🌈👀☀️🌸💭

Hello Grandy,

 

I hope yesterday went well for you lass & that everything is now working as it should. I was thinking of you all day & also wondering how your furs were coping with strangers in the house. 

I hope you rewarded yourself with something yummy for tea.

 

Hugs

Paws

mmMekitty
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Please, Grandy, how did it go with the electricians?

Like Paws, & I am sure, DB too, I have been thinking of you, trying to send out feelings of strength, security & confidence your way.

Hugzies

mmMekitty

Ggrand
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hello Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩, mmMeKitty, Paws and everyone….🤗..

 

Thank you for your caring posts…

 

My power in every room of my house is working now…I am so grateful that I don’t have to step over extension cords or keep turning my fridge of to wash….I can even cook some toast while my jug boils….Life is much better now…

 

Only 2 young men came, an electrician and an apprentice…I sat outside on my veranda mostly, to keep out of their way, my dogs followed them around until they started banging, then the little ones hid from them…..(they don’t like noise)  my rescue dog then stayed with me……at times I could here them swearing when the had some trouble up in the roof, that frightened me a bit, the word they used is very often triggers me….I kept telling myself it’s not directed at me, but at the wires…

 

The 2 young men were very polite and respectful with me….after around an hour I was starting to feel calmer, my anxiety and fear started to ease off…until I had to use the bathroom….the position of the man hole required a ladder that blocked the bathroom….Luckily my neighbour (Mrs nsc) saw me sitting on the veranda and after about 3 hours asked me over her place for a coffee, which I readily accepted….I needed the loo more then a coffee…I think I took her by surprise by accepting so quickly😁…I stayed a half hour then went back to mine after thanking her so much for the coffee and the use of her bathroom….

 

They were around 4 hours repairing the wiring….I felt silly but had to ask them to please secure the manhole cover with some double sided tape because I have a huge fear of an open manhole…the apprentice laughed at me…which hurt a bit and made me feel silly,  but the electrician took me seriously and did what I asked….and also said a few words to his apprentice about him laughing at me….the apprentice apologised to me…..

 

When they were finished and loading up their truck…my 3 dogs escaped from my yard…the 2 men then refused to leave until they got them back inside my gate, it was a bit funny watching my dogs run to them and just as they went to reach out to pick them up…they took off again😂…after about 15 minutes they caught them and deposited them back behind my now closed gate….It wasn’t at all like my anxiety imagination though it would be like….

 

Now I’m starting to stress over the price…it’s about 6 hours all up….that has been spent at my house over the past 2 weeks concerning my electricity…..while I’m stressing I’m also extremely grateful that I can pay him off….the first couple of electricians wanted money up front…..so I’m very lucky…..I found that company, they were the ones that put in my air conditioner a few years back….but also they wanted at that time money first before they installed it…..

 

I learnt a lesson on Friday….of trust, that there are some good men around….that are kind and respectful….

 

Hugs everyone, 🤗🤗🤗,

 

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy…

mmMekitty
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi Grandy

How wonderful, a job well-done for them & you! I hope you realise how well you coped  with the men being there & are proud of you.

Maybe they oughtn't to be swearing when working in someone's house, even though it is in frustration over some aspect of the work. When someone comes to your place to do work they ought be polite ALL the time. Next time someone is there working & you hear them swear, you can ask them to please son't swear. Remember, your home - your rules.

It was very good that the electrician had a word to the apprentice when having a laugh at your fear of the manhole being open. As things are here, they ought not be making judgemental comments or indicating with laughter, or any other sign of disrespect towards their customers if they do think anything you do or say is 'odd' in any way.

But I don't think your fear of the open manhole is odd or irrational. I think about one here, on my way on the path between my front door & the front gate. It's not opem  just loose, & I think I'd feel much better if I don't step on it in case it suddenly tips & becomes an open hole for me to trip up & fall ,& get my leg stuck in. My concerns have not been taken seriously. I guess, just because it's loose doesn't mean it will actually tip & open enough for my leg to get stuck inside. Nevertheless, I try to ensure, every time I pass by, that I don't step on it.

I have had people in my place, electricians, plumbers, people from state housing to inspect the place, people delivering things, OTs, a physio, some people to install &/or fix my computer & my support worker, too, & none have been but maybe a little disrespectful or inconsiderate of my needs. Once I discovered one had lied when he said he was wearing a mask, when my support worker told me he wasn't - taking advantage of the fact I couldn't see enough to know he was lying. Personally, I think that's pretty bad, but not nearly as bad as any of my fears have imagined about what could happen.

It's great you are able to pay the bill off rather than all at once. Still, I know paying the bill will be a struggle. I hope you can get help with that.

Funny thinking of the men trying to catch your dogs, who no doubt thought it was a good game.

It's all worked out quite well - you can cook & turn on lights, with the knowledge the wiring is new & safe. 

Hugzies

mmMekitty

Croix
Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Grandy~

That certainly worked out well 🙂  Your house has full electricity back and that is no small thing.

 

I think the bigger thing is you were surrounded by people that looked out for you - even if some of their  language away from you was not ideal. I'm not surprised you reacted to that, but as you mentioned, it passed.

 

They were respectful - even to the extent of setting the apprentice straight, they fixed the ceiling door and went to retrieve your fur babies - not part of their job, just kindness.

 

Your neighbor was (thankfully) considerate too.

 

To add to all that you have had men in your house and handled it well.

 

I'm happy for you

 

Croix

demonblaster
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Dear Grandy love 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 Hi to everyone too🙂

 

Heya sweety it’s so good hearing how it all went and boomer with a few definite plus’s

Isn’t it great having something so important and needed back. Happy for you Huns 🤗

There’s a lot we take for granted isn’t there until we don’t have it and the buzz of having it backs unreal eh. 

 

Dear Grandy it’s so good hearing that the anxiety was better than expected.

I think that’s often the case thank goods.
You I’d think would have something to do with that even if subconsciously. You’ve come such a long way through extremes of anxiety facing the demons. And again you conquer. You go girl! Your gaining the power. Our thoughts can so easily take hold as we well know but you still did what you had to.

 

I too would have felt not only hurt but angry at the bloke laughing. It’s bloody disrespectful derogative and small minded.

I liked that clearly the more mature decent bloke put him straight by the sounds and that he apologised. People don’t realise how hurtful there actions and words can be. At least maybe he’s learnt something, 

 

I agree with what the loves here have said about swearing esp at someone else’s place. 

Yes I too was full throttle thoughts about how you were going Huns on the day esp 

 

How beautiful Mrs neighbour looking out for you as she did. So good seeing the better side of her.  

I hope you’re at least giving yourself a little pat on the back sweet thing you didn’t take off and handled the situation as hard as it was. 

so lovely them getting the gorgeous furs in, hard not to smile hearing how it sounded like they were playing with them 😆

Precious Grandy how are you going in other parts of your life darlin🤗  I dearly hope the depressions more manageable and not so often now days. Such hard yakka isn’t it. And that the pains more manageable too. Is it reasonably, I doubt with the R) arm still hurting it would have backed off unfortunately by the sounds of the damage done but easier to cope with I hope and with finally pain relief. Geez took them long enough to give you something!

 

Really do love you dear friend 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 you’re in my thoughts 💭countless times daily with the best of love 💜and care sweet friend. 🌈🍫🌸☀️🧚🏼‍♂️

 

Take care beautiful people, we deserve peace and self love as well 👍🌸 we got the goods it’s about learning to use them I’m realising. 

 

 

Hello Grandy, wave to everyone,

 

How are you lass? No pressure to reply, I've just been wondering how you are & how your arms are?

 

The paddocks here abouts are full of lambs & calves cavorting about & being called by their respective mums. I still get surprised sometimes how loud the mooing & baaing can be, especially when there is more than one making all the noise. 

 

I did have a chuckle at the mental image of your furs playing hard to catch, cheeky little devils. We had a labrador when I was in my teens who if he got out would not come if called, but all we had to do was stand by our front gate & shake his metal chain lead & then he was silly enough to come racing back so he could go for a walk. 

 

Here are some big 🐻 hugs

Paws

Hello Grandy, wave to everyone,

 

Just swinging by to say hi... I have a triple choc sponge cake & a big pot of tea (or it will come out as coffee if you prefer)... I thought we could settle down on your verandah with a big fan to blow away the hot air & the pesky flies... I have doggy treats in my pockets to bribe your furs for a doggy cuddle or even just a tail wag... 

 

I thought I could do a walrus (don't tell Croix) & we could "talk of ship & shoes & sealing wax, & cabbages & kings" or anything else that comes to mind. Of course we could simply sit in silence & soak up the loveliness of nature & all the creatures/plants we can see.

 

No pressure for you to reply lass

 

Gentle hugs

Paws

 

 

Croix
Community Champion
Community Champion

I heard that! "Do a Walrus" indeed! What cheek

-C( the original)