Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[Ggrand]

Dear Hanna, Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 ...and everyone...🤗..

Thank you both for your posts..

I really do try hard..making choices is still fairly new to me..and definitely not easy at all...

I talked a bit about choices with VS Counsellor yesterday along with how my anxiety has a huge part in decision making and choices...to look for the positives and negatives, write them out and if I still can’t decide then try again later on, after when my mind has had a rest from thinking to much about it..few tears about past decisions, but doing okay today...I need to sew a pocket on an apron that I use at work...That will keep me busy for a while..then maybe I’ll find something else to sew once I get it out...😷..

Oh thank you Deebi..I think in England that what we know as Sparrows..They call them Thrush..I might be wrong but they do both look alike...

I don’t think that my Boss will see the year out at work..He really doesn’t look well at all..and he forgets things...He forgot he drove his car to the fish n chip shop last Tuesday and walked back to the shop...Then when he wanted something from it..thought it got stolen..😂😂bad me for giggling..Karma is good...

I didn’t realise how much one day a week is beneficial to my mh...I hope so much that the boss doesn’t come in much on Tuesdays.....

Please enjoy your day the best you can everyone...I hope your weather isn’t as hot as mine is...

Thank you all for being the beautiful people you are...

Big love and care dearest bbff..that golden thread is getting thicker each day..impossible to break..💚💫💚🐻🤗.

Love to everyone with my care and hugs🤗💜🦋.

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy..

[Hanna3]

Hi Grandy,

I'm sorry if you have been sitting here for a while unanswered - I didn't see your post... Gosh we are in for a long heatwave, how are you and your furs bearing up? Remember to drink lots of water even if you don't feel thirsty, dehydration is the main reason people get sick in the heat...

I am so pleased that you went to the shop and yes, even one day a week makes such a difference doesn't it? I look forward to my music all week! I get to sit and chat with someone, it's so nice, and we get to make music, it's lovely. I'm so pleased you're enjoying the company there again - I was truly worried that you'd decide not to go back, and that you would get like my friend in my old coastal town, and just give up doing anything at all...

I'm sorry the man is sick... but perhaps if he leaves things will be easier for you.

Making decisions is exhausting! I think those of us here on BB don't have much confidence in ourselves, and constantly think we will make a wrong decision. I'm so glad you made the right one!

I am putting a piece of Schmako into the bottom of a cup and little Sam has to find a way to get it out - he tips the cup sideways, and rolls it over, and he puts his paw on it to try to hold it, but he hasn't worked out putting the cup upside down to get the treat to tip out!!! Hé;s having lots of fun trying to reach it.. he loves games like this!

I had a friend over for a cuppa this morning, it's so rare I get to have company I'm out of practice, but it was so nice to have a visitor.

A very hot week ahead Grandy, do take care of yourself and your furs won't you... hugs (except it's really too hot for hugging!!!) I'll send cool breezes your way instead!!! oxoxo

[Hanna3]

Grandy (and hi Deebi!)

Do you have a shady verandah you can sit out on? Mine is shady at the front in the morning, but very hot in the afternoon... the back is too hot as it faces west. It's lovely to sit on the front porch in the early evening and look at the hills - it's calming. I hope you have a cool shady verandah were you can sit out.

My friend who came today has an old rocking chair on her lovely verandah at her home... she got it from an Op Shop... it's so soothing to sit in and rock it slightly... I couldn't believe how calming a rocking chair is.. just a thought but maybe if you could get yourself one... it might be a real help to you? I would love on, but I need a porch big enough to put one on! My friend loves sitting in a rocking chair too, and looking out over her garden.

Hugs! Sam is still trying to get the treats out of the coffee mug!

[Ggrand]

Hello Hanna! waves Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩..and everyone..

Thats okay Hanna..no worries...There’s no pressure or expectations for replies...

Yes it’s going to be very hot..I stayed inside mostly today because I woke up to late to sit outside with my cuppa..it was to hot and sunny..It’s very nice to sit outside when it’s dark..but need to use plenty of aero guard ..😂 mosquitoes really like making me itchy...My furs sit one each side of me..so nice to just and relax in the darkness..

Kya & Ebony..Have been running around the back yard today..in this heat!!..I have always the front and back door open for them..it’s their choice to be inside or outside..I think because they have been with me..one since 5 weeks old..the other born here..I think that they are used to the weather...I know when they are to hot, when they lay with their bellies on the vinyl floors...They love having those Zooper Dooper ice blocks ...😁..um so do I..😂.

I agree Hanna..it’s exhausting trying to know which way to choose....Yes I think most people struggling with mh find it hard to make life choices...It’s a matter I think of practice and trying to be gentle on ourselves..once we have decided..

Thank you for reminding me about hydration...I have a few bottles of water in the freezer...as well as lots of ice..I love watching my furs chasing the slippery ice all around the lounge room when I give them one each...They play with them and eat them at the same time😂..

Stay as cool as you can dear Hanna...I’m so happy about your visitor today..I read on your thread who she was and the beautiful thing she’s doing for you...

My love hugs and care Hanna, Deebi and everyone...

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy..

[Paw Prints]

Hello Grandy,

I have the Zooper Dooper ice blocks as well... they are yum... especially the green ones.

Hmm.. maybe the running around outside in the heat is a little dog thing??? Woofa gets to the back door... goes nope it's too hot & turns around back to the couch under the cooling. I had the little portable fan in my room last night as it stayed hot all night... of course Woofa hogged the best spot on the bed.

I just heard the weatherman say things are staying hot in NSW until tomorrow night... I do hope the cool change comes through earlier than that for you...

I'm pleased for you that you want to continue volunteering at the shop... your right it is good for your mh to be able to get out & about. I'm sure Betty & the others are glad to see you back.

Stay cool lass

Hugs

Paws

[startingnew]

💜💙💚

[Ggrand]

Hi Dear Paws, Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩! Starts....and everyone..

Thank you Paws..I think I done the right thing...it was nice to see the other girl again last week....It’s nice and cool here today..bit upset with me that I couldn’t get myself motivated enough to mow....while it’s cooler...Will have to wait for another cool day....but that’s okay..only will be harder because it grows so much and so quickly...

Yesterday...Betty rang me and sounded not good at all...I went down hers and had to call n ambulance...She is home today..she was diagnosed with....Costochondritis it’s a painful condition on the ribs..not life threatening...nothing can be done except pain relief..I was so worried about her and still am.....

My furs are enjoying the cooler weather today...sitting out front on my glass outdoor table..sticky braking at everything.....😂 and letting anyone driving past that they are still here....

Ahh...Little Butterfly 🦋..It’s so good hearing from you...I hope that you are managing okay...will pop over to your soon...

Hi Deebi....Its okay bbff...I know your going through bp atm...and a few very painful physical things....I how hard it is to manage that....When your up to popping over..we will sit on my veranda and have a coffee and cake together, while our fur girls give you lots of hugs...me as well...love you bbff...💜🦋🤗..gentle hugs..

My love, hugs with care everyone..

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy..

[Moonstruck]

Hello Grandy......I'd love to know how others cope with various pains and injuries that happen to our bodies as we get older...seemingly out of nowhere.

I find it is getting me down terrible, not to be able to just walk a few blocks, or along the beach, or do housework, clean the yard, etc...without something giving me pain. An injury I thought was healed, fixed...seems to flare up depending which way I stand, move, sit, whatever.....even driving, keeping my foot on the pedals is painful exerting the muscle effort required stopped at red lights.

How do you all keep your spirits up when your body won't let you do things....and I can't get "motivated" either and others make me feel guilty telling me what will "make me feel better, and it's good for you" etc etc..."You'll love it, make sure you go" I feel like a failure when the motivation just is not there....be happy...Moon S x

[Ggrand]

Hello Moon.....Don’t feel like a failure ever..You do the best we can..and believe me..we can’t do any better then our best... I think the people who tell you what’s good for you or t,Ray this and that...are only trying to help you...in their own way..out of concern for you..

My daily motivation is really bad...It’s so hard getting motivated when you live alone....I can’t find a reason to do anything for myself...only the usual household chores...which gets done before my mh supporter visits me...

Im sorry an old injury flares up from time to time...that’s no good...just be careful when your driving...or walking..

My Dr, told me once that just because we are getting older...doesn’t mean we should get aches and pains....She is youngish...she might change her way of thinking as she ages..

I just do because if I don’t no one else will...I wish my sprits were up doing chores...Nope the are not...I have no pleasure in doing things...everything is a chore..and do them because they needed doing weeks ago🙂..Sometimes listening to music through earphones help to make things feel less harder to do....

I wish I could answer your question dear Moon...When my children were still at home....or my late husband was still with me..I had plenty of motivation...I think because we do for them and not us...idk...Living alone as I said earlier...I can’t find a reason why or what for to do things....

Sorry not much help Moon...I hope your day was good today..We had a very cool day...

I mowed my lawn today...only because mine was the only one with long grass...( guilt I think can be a source of motivation at times)..

Much love Dear Moon...You too be happy 😊..

Grandy..

[demonblaster]

Beautiful Grandy 👩‍❤️‍👩 hi everyone ☺

Hey lovey I hope you're coping ok honey. Always wondering how you are esp soon after VC.

Just a quicky drop in for now hun to let you know which I so appreciate that you do know that if I'm not here in virtual person thoughts 🗯 always are and I always read and keep updated.

Oh poor Betty I'll look that up what she's got it sounds very painful. Horrid when there's nothing can be done. Hope she's goin ok or at least eased off. You're a great friend as I well know 🤗

Thanks being so understanding but I do feel bad if it's too long away from you.

Have to choof now lovey c u later (L8r)

So much love 👩‍❤️‍👩💜🤝🗯🤗