Lost my husband to suicide not coping

[Forever_lost]

I lost my beautiful husband 6 months to suicide and I’m so lost and lonely. He was my soul mate the love of my life and now his gone. His family have placed the blame on me and have said some very horrible and nasty things about me it’is pushing me over the edge and I’m felling more and more like I want to go with my husband. My husband had suffered from depression and alcoholism due to a very traumatic childhood and he would not seek the proper help he need he would always say I’m ok Baby. We loved and adored each other and to think people are saying my husband didn’t love me is breaking my heart 💔. I don’t know how to go on anymore I have been in hospital twice since his death. IS IT MY FAULT MY HUSBAND DID THIS? I need help to understand why his family blame me so harshly I loved them. We had a fight the night before due to his drinking and not working for over 2 years things were getting really hard financially as I was the only one working this got so bad we had to start selling our personal belongings and were going to be evicted from our rental house I should have kept my mouth shut and never said anything to him I live every day blaming myself and than to also have others blame is just to much. Even though we had our ups and downs like all couples do we never stopped loving each other I just want my husband home with me.

[Sophie_M]

Hi Forever lost,

We are so sorry to hear about the loss of your husband. We are also very grateful that you have been brave enough to share your story here with our online community. Please know we are here to support you during this tough time. It’s normal to feel so lost, grief has no set pattern, and everyone experiences grief differently.

Our Support Services are trying to reach you via email as we are worried about you.

We would strongly recommend giving our wonderful friends at Lifeline a call - 13 11 14, they can talk to you and help you through difficult moments.

Keep reaching out to us and letting us know how you are when you feel up to it.