Hi there minimoo
I’d like to extend a warm welcome to you to Beyond Blue and to thank you so much for coming here and providing your post.
Firstly I’d like to say how sorry I am to hear of awful news of your fiancée passing.
Just for a little context, I’ve lost both my parents and I also lost my brother, my closest mate back in 1991.
The tragedy of a life lost is something that is in my experience, the worst and hardest thing to deal with in this world. Especially when that person meant so much to us.
Pulling yourself back into life? That’s a toughie – and really what works for one person, may well be of no use to another person. So all I can suggest is to provide you with things that sort of helped me through. But just before I get to that, I just hope that you’ve been given a stack of support over this past year – professional assistance, counselling, gp appointments, etc.
That’s kind of where I started off – and all the while, I’ve always been an active person, be it running, or lifting weights. I used to play cricket and that helped me with the release of a lot of aggression and anger about what happened, or just the release of other pent up emotions. And yes, I’m on medications, which again are another helping factor.
You say that small tasks can be too big – but stick with them, stick to it. Because what might be too difficult one day, you just might find that another day, you are able to get in and give it a go or even complete it.
I think the other thing it helped me with is putting things into perspective. You see life and you see how quickly it can go. Though because of this, I’ve found I’ve had a lot of disagreements with my partner about different things – where I possibly trivialise certain things because when I look at the bigger picture, I just try to decide what is REALLY important and what isn’t. Though this thinking still doesn’t help me with my mental illnesses, unfortunately.
Would love to hear back from you.
Neil
