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2 years ago my brother committed suicide

GeneM
Community Member

Nothing feels the same since my brother passed. He struggled with mental health issues for majority of his life. The year before he died was the hardest year. It felt like I was watching him die in slow motion, I couldn't help him, nothing could. Unfortunately support from "friends & family" lasted about as long as the flowers so I've been dealing with this loss alone. I think about him everyday, little things will bring him to my mind all the time which feels like a blessing and a curse. I've been experiencing alot of emotions lately and I think its just my grief trying to find an escape. I feel like I have to hide my grief because its been 2 years, but it feels like it happened last week all the time. I guess I wanted to share my story to connect with others who may have gone through something similar and maybe find some support. Cheers

1 Reply 1

Croix
Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear GeneM~

Welcome here to the Forum, a good move as you are not getting the support or understanding you need.

 

There is no time-line of greif and loss, and it can come and go, and of course affect your life. There is no need to hide it, sadly it is a part of life. The suicide of your brother would be particularly hard to bear, as not only do you have the grief of loss, but also the sense of waste, of maybe feeling you did not do this or that  which might have prevented it -the "what if's" so may endure.

 

The plain fact of the matter is no one person can keep another alive, no much you love or want the best for them. The hard part is realizing this, and you did your best, which is all anyone can do - no magic formulas I'm afraid.

 

Even so there are some tihngs that cna help such as planning what to do during anniversaries or significant dates. Trying to see the good times you may have had together, and maybe talking to someone who has been though the same thing and is properly trained to be a comfort.

 

I"d suggest the Peer CARE Companion Warmline where you can book a chat with someone else wiht similar expereince and see how they coped

 

Another is the Standby Suicide Bereavement Counseling Service, unfortunately SBCS and Peer Support is only available in NSW,QLD, VIC and NT via 1300 727 247, however they do offer up to 4 sessions with the same councilor.

 

I think you would be surprised how many people are in your situation and have the same feelings, not being alone does make a difference

 

You are always welcome here

 

Croix